You are viewing gaelicspirit

Dean Salute
Hey ya'll!

How's the hiatus treating you?

This has been a busy, emotion-packed, roller-coaster of a summer here in Lawrence. We've been immersed in soccer (anyone watch the World Cup? June and July were 24/7 futbol in my house and anytime my Sporting KC boy, Graham Zusi, was on the screen w/ the USMNT, I was right there -- I mean, can you blame me:, kept Mo Chuisle busy with archery and swimming lessons, the hubs worked as a counselor for a youth CCFA camp, I busted my tail to keep my contracting gig at Cisco (long, complicated, politically-driven story that ends in "ugh, big corporations are insane") and balance the chaos and mayhem that defines my mother and siblings, and, sadly, we recently had to put down our 13-year-old Aussie mix, which resulted in more emotional exhaustion than I think any of us were prepared for.

With school starting for Mo Chuisle once more it feels as though everything should be getting "back to normal." But alas! We still have, what? Something like 42 days until the premiere of SPN S10? Not that I'm counting or anything. *shifty-eyes*

That's what I came by here to chat with ya'll about. I've gotten some interesting -- albeit flattering -- emails and PMs lately because I posted a story from another fandom and I thought I'd ramble a bit about the state of my brain when it comes to one of my favorite escapes: TV land.

Firstly, I will be continuing the post-episode Rambles here on my LJ with S10. If you enjoy reading and/or commenting on those at all, I wanted you to know you can return here to do so and I would love to see you. One minor complication is that it looks like I have to travel out to California for work during premiere week, so my Ramble will probably be a smidge late as I'll have to wait to download it on my Kindle, but! It'll be here. I would miss you guys too much! One of the best things to come out of my SPN adoration has been friendships; through this little-show-that-could, I have been fortunate to make some forever friends that truly changed my life. *sniff* *blinks away grateful tears*

That said, since I completed that post S9-finale one-shot, Hell Is Empty, I haven't felt the pull to write stories for our Winchesters as I used to. Something happened to me upon seeing Dean's black demon eyes. I felt like I couldn't easily see the Dean I loved to weave into my stories. I didn't stop being a fan or stop feeling invested in what the fate of my hero and his brother would ultimately be. It didn't stop my insatiable curiosity to find the answer to, "And then what happens?!?" But my muse...faltered. I couldn't summon the energy to create scenarios or ponder what ifs when it came to our boys. I had previously decided that From Yesterday would be my last SPN multi-chapter fic, but I left the door wide open for one-shots and it was rather disheartening to not feel really driven to create in this fandom. all.

So, instead I worked on my original novel (which, incidentally, has evolved into a possible three-book story arc and I am really pretty sure I'm totally insane for thinking I can actually pull that off but I fell a little bit in love with my main character and, well, I kinda want to see what he'll do). And I watched some other summer shows, like Teen Wolf (what? plot-schmot...they're witty and way easy on the eyes, even if I'm probably twice the age of most of them, and I REGRET NOTHING!), Outlander, and, most recently, The Musketeers.

And something interesting happened. My fanfic muse, which had been sleeping curled up in the corner of my brain, giving way to the heavier writing hand of Work Stuff and Original Novel writing, perked up her little head and began sniffing the air. I found I wanted to write stories again. Right now I'm in history-building mode with Original Novel where I have finally reached Level 4 and have cracked my character's tragic back stories, and am mapping out the city where they live so that I can keep track of streets, and am creating outlines so that I don't accidentally have someone discover something too early, and that's not really writing where one gets totally lost in the storytelling aspect, so...I've felt the lack.

But recently, I've found I want to tell stories again. About brotherhood and friendship and loyalty and the willingness to lay it all on the line for the sake of another. About bravery and betrayal and sacrifice and redemption. About boys with swords. And, for the first time since August 2006, it wasn't triggered by our Winchesters. I mean, sure, I've written one shots in other fandoms before -- Sons of Anarchy, Hawaii Five-0, White Collar, even The Young Riders. But they were truly one shots. One-off stories to see if I could pull it off. Create something from a show that I hadn't been living and breathing for the last ten years (or whatever amount of time it was when I wrote those get the idea).

Here's the most amazing part: I wasn't booed off the stage. People seemed to like what I created. Which only fed the muse. Now she's not just sniffing the air, she's prowling. She's moving through the forest of ideas, crouching low, shoulders bunching and bouncing, her eyes focusing on a target. She's ready to pounce. And it's exciting! It's exciting in a way it hasn't been in awhile, I'll be honest. I didn't realize that my muse had been languishing until I began to feed her again. I thought she had been fed nicely, but I think I was trying to keep her alive on black coffee and pie when I needed to ply her with something a bit...different.

The thing is, you really don't ever forget your first love and what I'm realizing is that I don't have to be totally devoted to our Winchester boys to be invested in their stories. I can wander, dabble, try different characters from different shows and my excitement for what is on deck for Dean and Sam wouldn't falter. I know the vast majority of you guys already knew that, and are most likely shaking your heads and tsking me, but it took me wanting to jump feet-first into another obsession and fall until my head was below the surface for me to realize that I can love SPN and also write elsewhere.

So, in response to those emails and PMs, yes, I am still following the plight of our favorite denim-clad mid-westerners. And yes, I'll be watching and reviewing as before. But, I honestly don't know if I'll write fic in the SPN universe for awhile. Or...again. It truly depends on what happens in the Show's storyline and if my muse catches a scent. In the meantime, until such time as Work Stuff and Original Novel take over the keyboard, there will be more boys with swords via The Musketeers fic (because I adored that first 10-episode season). If you like that sort of thing, I would love to hear from you. But, if not, come on by and talk SPN with me. I'll be right here waiting. *smile*
One For All
Title: One For All [Link to story on AO3]
Fandom: The Musketeers, BBC
Author: gaelicspirit
Characters/Pairings: d’Artagnan, Athos, Porthos, Aramis, Treville - GEN
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Nothing you recognize is mine.

Summary: Soldiers follow orders, no matter where they lead. Even if they lead to death. d’Artagnan discovers how far he is willing to go to save his brothers. Set sometime after d’Artagnan receives his commission (post 1.09, Knight Takes a Queen).

Author’s Note: This is my first story in this fandom; I loved Dumas’ Three Musketeers when I was young and have recently been smitten with the BBC show. I typically write in the Supernatural fandom, but that hiatus has been long and I felt a tug toward something a bit different. I was drawn to the brotherhood and heroism of these characters and, quite honestly, craved an outlet after being writing-dormant for about two months.

I’ve tried to tell this story through the eyes of five different men, and it was an interesting exercise as I feel I’m still getting acquainted with them. If anyone seems OOC, I apologize. I also hope you can forgive language not quite authentic to the 17th century as I honestly couldn’t get the cadence down. But I think a story of brotherhood can surpass linguistic accuracy.

I linked the title to where the story is posted on Archive of Our Own as I didn't find any communities on LJ for The Musketeers and have no idea what sort of interested there is for this sort of story over here. But! Just in case those of you who enjoy my stories watch and/or might be interested, I wanted to offer the opportunity to read.

*smile* I hope those of you who read enjoy!

“Life is a storm. You will bask in the sunlight one moment, be shattered on the rocks the next. What makes you a man is what you do when that storm comes.”
- Alexander Dumas
ovaries explode
Hi all.

If you're reading this, I already miss our weekly Supernatural chats. I'm being totally serious! You all are one of the best things about being so obsessed with this show. So, I hope the hiatus is treating you well and that you're enjoying whatever you spend your time doing when our boys are not taking over our lives on a weekly basis. I've been trying to do some writing since I completed my last SPN one-shot...aaaaand that's where the confession part of this post comes into play.

Since I started writing fanfic and posting the weekly SPN Rambles, I've made a point of replying personally to each comment and/or review. I feel like those of you who take the time to leave me a comment on an episode review, one-shot, or chapter are offering me a gift of your time and I want you to know how much I appreciate that. Not only do you help me remember I'm not alone in my obsession, but your input encourages me to keep writing and telling stories.

And without writing and stories, I now know I'd be a shell of a person. Your input saves me from feeling hollowed out.

But while I will continue to work through the reviews to my last three stories (bad Gaelic for getting so behind!!), I find I'm really struggling with replying to the comments made on the Ramble for 9.23, Do You Believe In Miracles. It's not the comments, per se. It's the episode itself. Every time I sit down and pull up the Ramble, I start to feel this strange hole inside me where my hero and muse usually resides.

I know it's just a TV show. You know it's just a TV show. But it's brought so many of us so much more than just weekly entertainment that it's come to mean more to me than just a TV show. The ending of Season 9 offered us all an enormous possibility in storytelling for Season 10, and I am anxious to see where they'll take the overall storyline, but I'm finding the loss of Dean in the last ten minutes of the finale something I'm not really able to get over and discuss in comment replies quite yet.

The interesting thing is...I didn't feel this sense of loss when Dean died and went to Hell at the end of Season 3. Somehow I knew it would end up okay, even though we saw him suspended from chains crying out for Sam in the last minutes. Perhaps it's because I hadn't really experienced loss myself at that time. In the ensuing years, loss has hit me a few times -- most recently within the last year with the loss of my father. Something about Dean's death this time just...felt real. That and those damn demon-black eyes has me just not really wanting to go back there quite yet.

So, I wanted to thank each of you who took the time to read the Ramble for 9.23 and offer your thoughts. I read each of them and appreciate the input, shared emotion, theories, rants, commiseration, all of it. But I won't be replying to these comments this go-round. Not that I expect anyone is losing sleep over not hearing back from me, but just in case there are a few of you who are 'miffed' I wanted to offer an explanation and an apology. I hope you understand.

I still plan on Rambling for Season 10 starting in October. If you enjoy these types of recaps, I hope you'll return. And I will still reply to story reviews (slowly, but I'll get there).

In the meantime, I'm working through story outlines, character sketches, plot twists, and the random hurt/comfort scene for my original story, Kill Creek Road. It's quite a different experience, knowing that anyone who reads it will be entering my world rather than both of us happily meeting up in a world we are jointly comfortable in. But I'm enjoying stretching my writing wings a bit, and if and when I am able to finish this tale, I hope some of you will read it.

My best to you always.

only to you

Title: Hell Is Empty
Fandom: Supernatural
Author: gaelicspirit
Characters: Dean, Sam, Crowley

Summary: Tag to 9.23, Do You Believe In Miracles. There's no pill quite as bitter as regret. Two brothers realize the impact of choices made and words said in the heat of the moment when their future lies broken and bleeding before them.

Disclaimer/Warning: They're not mine. More's the pity. Title and opening quote come from Shakespeare's The Tempest. Also, this tag deals with death, though if you've seen Episode 9.23, you're pretty much already dealing.

Author's Note: I didn't think I wanted to write this. I was asked to and resisted, thinking that watching the finale had been hard enough. But a week after viewing I realized I was still thinking about it and knew that one of the only ways I was going to be able to process was through writing. This is a one shot; I thought about taking it further but then decided I didn't want to get too far down the path of possibility this early in the hellatus.

As with all stories, this is simply one interpretation, one speculation, and one possibility. I had to pick a direction for my hero and I picked the one I thought I could deal with…but, that said, I look forward to seeing how our Show will move forward from the end point of the finale and how they'll mend our broken hearts.

So, this is for those of you who PMd and Tweeted, asking me to write a tag. It feels somewhat twisted and wrong to say I hope you enjoy this, knowing the angst and sorrow I'm about to put you through, but if nothing else, I hope you're able to process, as I was. And that we all feel a little bit of hope again.

Hell Is EmptyCollapse )

only to you

Title: Hell Is Empty
Fandom: Supernatural
Author: gaelicspirit
Characters: Dean, Sam, Crowley

Summary: Tag to 9.23, Do You Believe In Miracles. There's no pill quite as bitter as regret. Two brothers realize the impact of choices made and words said in the heat of the moment when their future lies broken and bleeding before them.

Disclaimer/Warning: They're not mine. More's the pity. Title and opening quote come from Shakespeare's The Tempest. Also, this tag deals with death, though if you've seen Episode 9.23, you're pretty much already dealing.

Hell Is Empty, Part 1

Hell Is Empty, Part 2Collapse )

Stream of Consciousness, Epi 9.23

The Ramble on Wednesdays
For the first time in an SPN finale, I heard the lyrics to "Carry On Wayward Son" differently. Instead of focusing on there'll be peace when you are done, the words noise and confusion resonated for me. With as much that happened in this episode, right now it feels like so little was actually resolved and so much more was stirred up. I suppose that's the point of a finale: get us geared up for the next season.

The RambleCollapse )

I have to put this outside the cut, as not everyone reads all the way through the recap. I've been writing these Rambles each episode since Season 3; some of you have been reading and commenting since that time, some of you simply read, some of you are newer, some just happen by. I want to take a moment to thank all of you for the gift of your time reading and commenting, if you choose to comment.

I know there are tons of different places you can find reaction reviews -- many of you write one yourself. And I know they range from clever & funny to educated & insightful. Mine is just...emotion. With some thoughts and reasoning peppered in, but nothing ya'll wouldn't get to on your own. Not the best out there, for sure. But I hope they have entertained you. And I am appreciative of your comments; I'm going to miss you over the hellatus. I'm going to miss interacting with you guys almost as much as I'll miss watching our boys. *smile*

So...have a good four month break. And if you come back on October 14th, I'll be here. Carrying on...and hoping for that promise of peace when they're done.


Stream of Consciousness, Epi 9.22

The Ramble on Wednesdays
Right now I can't decide if I'm anxious for next week's episode because I can't wait to see what happens...or because I can't wait to get it over with. Like ripping off a band aide. I know it's gonna hurt, but I need to go through it. Maybe it's a little of both.

The RambleCollapse )

Stream of Consciousness, Epi 9.21

The Ramble on Wednesdays
Wow, so...that wasn't what I expected. But man, I'm along for the ride. Also, warning for length. I apparently had a lot to say.

The RambleCollapse )

Stream of Consciousness, Epi 9.20

The Ramble on Wednesdays
So. The spin-off launch pad. And probably the shortest Ramble in the history of Rambling.

The RambleCollapse )
only to you

Title: When You Break
Fandom: Supernatural
Author: gaelicspirit
Disclaimer: They're not mine. More's the pity. Story title from song by Bear's Den, as are the lyrics at the beginning and end of the story.

Summary: Missing scene from 9.18, Meta Fiction. Is there a moment you recognize the edge, or do you simply slip over, your exhale a helpless prayer that someone will be there to catch you and pull you back?

Author's Note: This might have been a bit more timely had I been able to write and post it directly after the episode, but life had other ideas for how I should spend my time over the last week. I'm not certain this hasn't already been written much better by someone else, but this moment wouldn't let me go, so I sat down this afternoon and decided to give it a shot. I wanted to try to see the scene in the abandoned factory – the aftermath of Dean beating Gadreel for information – from each brother's eyes before the die is cast in the final four episodes of this season. Turns out, it was a bit harder than I thought as Dean isn't completely Dean and Sam has chosen to hold himself apart from this brother. Still, I hope it resonates with some of you.

Also, this has not been beta'd. Or even given my friend's customary sanity read. It's first-draft raw. And…it's a bit angsty. And dark. You've been warned.

When You Break, one-shotCollapse )

Time is Relative, Stories are Forever

August 2014
Powered by
Designed by Tiffany Chow