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Stream of Consciousness, Epi. 9.13

I'm learning never to trust the slant of the previews.




Really quick before I start -- thank you to everyone who commented on last week's Ramble. There were some really great, insightful comments -- not all of which agreed with my viewpoint. But everyone was civil (which is key for any good discussion) and left room for the fact that these are all just our own personal opinions of a show we're viewing through our own personal filters. I also gained a little bit of insight into a character I was really struggling seeing clearly, so I appreciate the opposing viewpoints being shared.

I didn't get to reply to everyone before this week's episode, but I read everything, agreed with much and appreciated the thoughts of the rest. Please don't take my lack of reply as a lack of interest; it's merely a lack of time. So keep your comments coming! *smile*

And remember -- quick PSA, here -- as always, this is just my opinion about this episode of our Show. One fan's thoughts, not meant to claim certainty or fact.

Now, on to The Purge.

Man, I'm trying to be good, watch what I eat, kill myself on the Boflex Treadclimber...I'd really like lose some pounds myself. And I'll be first to admit I've been tempted by those "lose 10 lbs in two weeks" ads on TV because who wouldn't want that, right? But I think I've been effectively turned away from the 'quick fix' solution. And all it took was one bad 'fish taco.' *wink*

So...there were good moments and amusing moments and a few aww moments in this episode, but I'm left sitting (as I did last week) with a sad, heavy heart at the end of it all. There's a line in the movie/book A River Runs Through It that came to mind in the final scene: "It's those we live with and should know who elude us. But we can still love them. We can love them completely, without complete understanding."

It's the "live with and should know who elude us" part that I'm caught on at the moment. I'll circle back to that at the end.

There was a lot more than fat being 'purged' in this episode...and I think that was kind of the point of the title. Sam has now had two episodes to get things off his chest, to be (literally) brutally honest in ways he probably hasn't felt free to be before -- not necessarily because of anything Dean has said or done, but because of Sam choosing to hold himself in check for a multitude of reasons. He's come clean about how he sees his brother, and how he feels about what he sees, and he's exposed a position in his view of their brotherly 'bond' that was completely opposite to what Dean has clearly taken for granted.

The truth is supposed to set you free, right? But when it's one-sided truth...I'm not sure if the same edict holds weight. Sam spoke the truth from his viewpoint, from how he saw the world and his assessment of Dean's reasons and motivations. But that wasn't Dean's truth, so how can it set either of them free? I don't mean to say that there isn't truth to what Sam said, but it's not the whole story, it's not the whole truth. And without that other side...what he said hurts without the opportunity to heal. Plus some of what he said had me wondering if he'd just flat-out forgotten what his brother has been through over the last 8 years, what he's been willing to do for Sam. Did the experience of being tricked into being healed by an angel through possession actually erase memories?

I think I get where the writers might be going with this. I'm just not sure why they're going there. I'm not sure why Dean has to be torn down so harshly by the one person he's literally given everything up for just to allow Sam an opportunity to stand on his own. An opportunity Sam deserves on his own merit, not at the destruction of his brother.

In life, if you strip away the assumptions that slip into place when you're dealing with family, you get a raw, personal reality that is rarely exposed because it hurts too damn much. We need our buffers of illusion and filters. We need our own truths to protect us from another's. Without them, we're all just left to shake together like skeletons someone forgot to bury.

I think Sam's anger was justified. He was hurt, he was wronged. I've never denied that. But the words he's now choosing in order to express the results of processing that anger are hurtful and in many respects untrue. I can see where he might be blind to that, though -- when we're wronged, we feel justified in lashing out. Especially if given the opportunity to lash out at the person who wronged us in the first place. There is an unspoken nod of agreement where we can say whatever we want to that person without fear of retribution because, hey, they wronged us, man. We are righteous in our anger! I cannot imagine there is a person among us who hasn't felt that at some point.

But, I honestly and truly hope the writers have just about gotten all of this out of their systems. It probably shouldn't mean as much to me as it does, but...dammit, it does. I think I'm going to have to once more process through the episode before I'm able to work through how tense and sad that last scene made me feel.

But before I suck out all the story from the episode just to get to the end (see what I did there), let's get to some lists. Because it was an unusual, entertaining hunt and totally bizarre MotW.

LOVED:


  • Dean's rough, tired voice at the beginning of the episode. He's always had a read me the phone book and I'm yours voice, but lately it's been deeper, raspier, like a rock star on a bender.

  • Plus also the scruff...just sayin'.

  • Dean and the Sheriff Hanscum eating powdered donuts.

  • Sam in spandex and a tank. Mostly in a tank. *bites lip* I think there needs to be more reasons for Sam to wear a tank. Like Ryan from The O.C. He was broody and moody, too, right?

  • Dean, in his suit, stretched out on the bed, laptop in lap. Don't ask. Just, nod and smile.

  • The Most Awkward Yoga Class Ever.

  • "Hey, New Guy. Stop flirting with the trainer and keep scooping."

  • "You're not the only one who's dated someone 'bendy'."

  • Groggy, mussy-haired Dean post-roofie incident.

  • "Doug's a dick. You deserve better."

LIKED:


  • Dean processing out loud why Slim Jim's wife might fall for Wayne McNutt while Sam shoots him stop it glares.

  • Dean telling Sam he's awkward around girls. Weird. Sam weird.

  • Dean in a hairnet. I mean, seriously. This guy makes hairnets look good. I can't even....

  • The MotW - a pishtaco. Mostly because it's the first time I've ever heard of them (I had to google the term to figure out how to spell it) and because it was totally gross. Plus also, I heard "fish taco" just like Dean and it had me cracking up.

  • The fact that pudding is Dean's undoing.

  • The fact that Dean knows what roofies look like at a glance...and Sam doesn't.

  • The fact that Marissa sounded like Penelope Cruz when she cried. Kinda looked like her, too.

MEH:


  • Until I'm able to end an episode without that feeling where you don't know if you want to yell, cry, get drunk, or drive somewhere really fast, I don't know if I'll be able to muster enough energy to 'meh' anything.

QUESTION:


  • Who do you think Dean was texting when he was in the kitchen?

  • I don't mind having episodes without him, but where do you think Castiel went? I mean, he was hanging out in the bunker in "First Born," healing Sam. And then Sam suddenly shows up in WI last week (which was apparently just a few days before this week's epi) and doesn't mention his whereabouts. He's not at the bunker when the boys get back there in this episode.... I mean, I know we see him next episode per the previews, but it just makes me wonder where he's spending his time if he's essentially Angel Enemy Number One.

  • Anyone else wondering when we're going to know what the 'cost' the Mark of Cain is going to be? Dean's not sleeping, he's drinking again, he's taking hits from his only safety zone, he's once more backsliding and clawing for purchase, and now he has a powerful 'mark' branding him.... *ponders*

THEN was basically our reminder that Sam can't trust Dean like he thought, Dean says they're family, but Sam's not so sure that really matters. Also, Dean looks gorgeous. NOW, we're in Stillwater, MN at a hotdog eating contest. Any eating contest in any story ever will always take me right back to the Barf-o-Rama from Stephen King's The Body (later the movie Stand by Me). Luckily, there wasn't any barfing...just some corny jokes, like Wayne McNut being declared the "wiener." Heh. Heh. Heh.

Slim Jim -- who lost to Wayne by one hot dog -- accuses him of cheating by sticking a hot dog in his pocket but Wayne makes a crude joke and is given the trophy, which he takes out to his car, laughing all the way. Turns out he did cheat and while he's chuckling in his car, he takes out the hot dog he cheated with and starts noshing on it (which...eww...hot dog with pocket lint). Suddenly, a hooded figure appears behind him and sucks the fat from his body. All. Of. It. Laugh it up, fuzzball.

At the bunker, it's apparently just been a couple days since they found Garth and Dean agreed to Sam's terms to hunt together again. Dean's in the kitchen, having some whiskey with his Cornflakes, and staring with tired eyes at the screen of a laptop. Sam comes bounding in -- looking really healthy and energetic, compared to how we've seen him in past episodes -- searching for breakfast stuff. He sweeps past Dean and asks off-handedly if Dean slept last night.

Yeah, that'd be a no. Dean sounds rough. And sexy as hell, but um. You got that, so. I'll move on.

Dean: Rudy was on. (I'm with Dean - have to watch this every time it's on TV.) Then Unforgiven. Then I was just too jacked to sleep, so...research.

Oh, the irony that he watched Unforgiven and couldn't sleep. *pets him*

Sam: Gadreel?

Hello, Mr. One Track Mind.

Dean: And Metatron, the Mark of Cain...crickets.

He did find a case, though, and tells Sam about Fat Boy Slim in Minnesota going from 300 to 90 lbs. Sam says he's game.

Dean: It's a whore's bath for me. I'll be ready in five.

He gets up and heads out of the room, pausing in the doorway when Sam speaks up.

Sam: You sure you're okay?

Dean: Why wouldn't I be?

Sam: 'Cause...this isn't about what I said the other day is it?

Dean: Oh, the 'we're not supposed to be brothers'? Don't flatter yourself. I don't break that easy.

True. Took 30 years of torture in Hell.

Sam: 'Cause I was just being honest.

I kinda had to shake my head at that. What did he want from Dean? A thank-you? Good for you for being honest, Sam. Well done.

Dean: Oh, yeah, no. (heads out of the room) I got that loud and clear.

Sam: *sighs*

At the Stillwater police station, the boys are suited up with their Agent personas getting the 411 from Sheriff Hanscum - a pretty, if a bit plump -- blonde woman with a thick MN accent. She gives them the low-down on the 'unfriendly rivalry' between Wayne McNutt and Slim Jim Morgan and exposes them to the world of the Competitive Eating Circuit. Which is a real thing. Oh, yeah. You betcha. They eat all sorts of whackadoo stuff...including deep fried butter. *gack*

While they're talking, she offers them powdered donuts, which Dean happily accepts and closes his eyes with the bliss of deliciousness at the first bite...a bite that leaves his mouth coated in powdered sugar. Sam does that furtive you got a little something on your mouth move and Dean basically dabs at the corner of his lips, missing the whole sugar mess. While Sam looks exasperated, it doesn't faze the Sheriff and she and Dean happily munch on their donuts.

I want to simultaneous-donut-eat with Dean. Just sayin'.

So, the boys head over to Slim Jim Morgan's to find out what he knows. The dude is like a buck soaking wet and is mainlining lettuce as he talks -- because it stretches the stomach...he's in training, you see. Dean's all, reason number 437 to avoid salads.

Slim Jim says that Wayne was a weasel and a cheat and that Karma is a bitch. Good thing he's got a solid alibi. Dean notices charms and trinkets on a shelf and Slim Jim says they belong to his "old lady" -- who, as it turns out, is a gypsy. Sam asks to use the bathroom and takes the opportunity to poke around, finding what looks like a hex bag in their bedroom. He snatches it and leaves before Gypsy Woman emerges from the shower. They leave their card with Jim and head to the motel.

After doing some research, they discover that the bag really is a hex bag, though it's not the same as a witches hex bag, I'm guessing. Just as they get to that conclusion, there's a knock at the door -- it's Jim's wife. She wants the bag back. She didn't use it to curse Wayne; it was a blessing. She wanted Wayne to win so she could get a quickie divorce from Jim -- she and Wayne were having an affair.

Dean has to process this a bit. A little extra cushion for the pushing. Hah! Sam is shooting darts at him with his eyes, but when Jim's wife says sadly that Wayne called her his Princess Jasmine, Dean smiled a little sadly at that, as if empathizing with her.

Elsewhere, in a gym, at night, a lady is on a bike, using hand weights and working out to Love Lift Us Up Where We Belong. When the timer goes off, she heads over to the scales to check her progress and her face when she discovers that she's actually gained weight broke my heart a little. I know how you feel, honey. *pets her*

She hears a sound and instead of grabbing one of those hand weights and standing at the ready -- I mean, she's alone in a big ol' gym at night -- she weighs herself once more, just to be sure. Of course, the hooded bad guy is in there and clonks her on the head with the hand weight that she should have used. She falls, groggy and we see something slither up under her sweatshirt and suddenly...all fat gone. That death was sad.

Next day, the boys are suited up again and talking to the cops, the woman -- Carol -- covered up by a body bag.

Dean: What did she weigh before?

Cop (looking at driver's license): 165.

Dean: So...180. Known fact, all women lie about their weight and age.

Sam: You told that waitress the other day you were 29.

Dean: Mmhmmm (with a so what's your point expression)

Cop: So...anything else?

He tells them that the Sheriff is actually out for the rest of the week on vacation. Dean find a mark on Carol's belly that looks like a suction mark and they speculation that it could be a changeling...or it could just be a birthmark. They have to check out the morgue. Just then a pretty, fit, blonde woman comes in and is talking to the cops. Dean suggests they split up, one stays here and talks to the staff, the other goes to the morgue.

Sam: I'll stay.

Dean: Ain't gonna happen.

Sam: Why?

Dean: Because you're weird around girls.

Kinda cracks me up that they're both in their 30's and he still says 'girls'.

Sam: What does that mean, weird?

Dean: You're awkward. Weird. Sam weird. Sorry, man. I'm just being honest.

With that snark and a dead-eyed glance, he moves past Sam and heads over to talk to the girl. The conversation basically just makes me feel more sorry for Carol having to die (she was trying to lose weight for her wedding) and reveals that the pretty blonde has a mark on her back like Carol's.

Back at the hotel, Sam returns from the morgue and Dean is sitting on one of the beds, still in his suit, sans jacket, legs stretched out in front of him, laptop in his lap. I don't know what it was about that image that just...yeah. ANYWAY, Sam discovered that Wayne had a suction mark just like the others and Dean tells Sam about how he discovered Canyon Valley Wellness Spa through the pretty trainer at the gym. They watch the ad -- two thin, fit, good-looking people talking about no surgery, no diet, blah blah blah, only takes a week.... uh-huh.

It's only a couple of hours away, so the boys head there the next day and apply as personal trainers in what was probably the weirdest, most uncomfortable interview ever. Dean was just really really enthused about making people sweat, kicking ass, and taking names. *hides face behind pillow*

Sam redirects saying they both have a passion for fitness and helping people. This speaks to Larry, the husband in this married couple/owners team, who said when he met Marissa he was as big as a house, but she turned him into a lean, mean fighting machine. Dude goes all Bruce Lee for a second, causing the boys to draw back in surprise. But then, gives Sam the trainer job...Dean gets relegated to the kitchen.

Complete with hair net. Sam approaches wearing his form-fitting gray tank that just...yes, please.

Dean: Nice shorts.

Sam: Nice hairnet.

Dean: Why do I gotta be the lunch lady?

Sam: Since when have you ever complained about being around food?

He's got a point.

Alsonso, head food guy, calls Dean out for "flirting" with the trainer and tells him to get back to work. Sam says it's okay, his Yoga class starts in 5 mins.

Dean: How do you know anything about Yoga?

Sam (smirking): You're not the only one who's dated someone 'bendy.'

A guest asks Dean if he has any oatmeal and Dean's all I wish...tofu pancake? It's about then we discover that Sheriff Hanscum is at the spa and is about to have her spa treatment -- called 'cupping'. I'm hoping this is a totally made up thing. Not the slither-tentacle sucking maneuver, of course, but the whole...heating the glass and putting it on the skin thing. Anyway, the cop basically passes out on the massage table and never feels the tentacle that suddenly comes out of Marissa's mouth, attaches to her back and allows fat to be sucked out of her body. *GAH*

In the kitchen, Dean is leaning against a counter, texting someone. Alonso the Kitchen Dude throws a towel at him and tells him, "You got time to lean, you got time to clean." Heh. My Dad used to say that.

Dean grumbles that they have to eat the same thing as the clients -- it's rabbit food to him and he's starving. He's given a huge bowl of pudding and told to put into the little dishes -- the clients get pudding on spa day. Last hurrah before the "real work" starts. Dean tastes the pudding, approves, and slips a container into his pocket all, it's my spa day, too.

In the Most Awkward Yoga Class Ever, Sam's telling everyone to hold Downward Dog for 5 mins, which earns him loud protests, so he changes it to 30 seconds and walks around the room checking their posture or position or whatever it is yoga instructors do. He sees that each person has that red suction mark on their backs. Curiouser and curiouser.

Somewhere in the depths of the kitchen, Dean has found a hiding place to consume his contraband pudding. Only problem is, when he stands up, he goes pale and has to sit again quickly, his vision blurring. He tries to stand up once more and ends up face-planting into a sack of sweet potatoes. Not cool.

As Sam's all good game, good game to the class as they leave, the sheriff is being wheeled back to her room and catches sight of him, calling him Agent Freeley. Whoopsie. Just then, Sam's phone rings and he's able to slip away before Larry (who is pushing her wheelchair) asks any questions. It's Dean on the phone and he sounds...wrong.

Dean: Sammy...need your help.

He's still face down, limbs all tangled, barely able to get the phone to his mouth.

Sam: Dean? What's wrong with you? Where are you?

Dean: Sweet potatoes.... (passes out again)

Sam starts to hunt for him, heading down to the kitchen, then finding a door to the basement, checking each door and calling for Dean. He finds him, still face down, and shakes him a bit to bring him around.

Dean (totally groggy): ...was drugged. Pudding. Supposed to be for clients. Couldn't resist.

Sam (sniffs the container): Salted caramel?

Dean (loopy smile): Yeah, man, best of both worlds. Salty and sweet.

Gotta agree there. That's why the Starbucks salted caramel mocha is my undoing.

Sam: Right. You stay here.

Dean: No, no, I wanna come with you. (barely moves...lays back down) Go ahead, man, I'll catch up.

Sam goes all growly when he finds one of the chefs and asks if he made the pudding.

Chef (coyly): Depends.

Sam: On what?

Chef: Whether you liked it or not.

Sam is like HULK SMASH and pins the guy to the wall, demanding to know what was in the pudding. He finds out that they put some supplements in it and brings the supplements and a can of soda to Dean, helping him sit up. Dean's all headache-face and mussy hair, holding his head in his hands and sitting on the bag of sweet potatoes as he drinks the soda. He looks at the supplements and tells Sam they're roofies.

Sam: How do you know what roofies look like?

Dean: How do you not know? Do you think I want to wake up in hotel bathtub...my kidney carved out...in Chechnya?

He asks Sam what he found out in yoga class, still needing to get his bearings. Sam is crouching in front of him, watching him drink the soda and tells him that everyone in the class had the suction marks. Dean's pupils are still wide from the drug as he wonders what the hell is going on there.

They decide to go talk to Sheriff Hanscum, admitting that they're working undercover on a connection to the deaths in town. They find out that she lost 10 lbs in one day because of "cupping" -- and that she had pudding right before her spa treatment. She tells them that she doesn't really give a flying fudge why it was so easy. Her husband, Doug, left her because he said she loved cookie dough milkshakes more than him.

Dean: Doug's a dick. You deserve better.

Meanwhile, Larry got suspicious and poked around and found the boys' fake ID stash in their glove compartment. Either he's a crafty spa guy and picked the lock, or the boys left the door unlocked. Either way. Not good. He shows the IDs to Marissa and they realize the boys are hunters and are here because of the deaths in town. Both instantly conclude what this means, though they don't tell us. Marissa goes to 'destroy the evidence' which is, apparently, big Tupperware containers full of *gag* fat. I can't even.... *shudders* She's about to go all slither on it again when Dean stops her, stepping into the room, gun pulled.

He ties her up and demands to know what she is she says she's pishtaco. Dean and I tilted our heads at the same time, probably with the same perplexed looks on our faces as he says, "You're a...fish taco?"

She says it's pishtaco -- a Peruvian Fat Sucker. Which just...eww. I can just see the writers googling for MotW and hitting that one with a, holy crap this could be totally gross isn't that cool conversation.

Dean: Never heard of it. So, like vamps with a sweet tooth for cellulite?

Marissa said that vampires kill; they're just parasites. She would never hurt anybody; that's why she and Larry started Canyon Valley. She could feed while helping others get thin. Win-win. However, there were two dead peeps in town who might disagree. So, Marissa tells Dean about Alonso...her brother.

Down in the kitchen, Larry is confronting Alonso, telling him he wants him out. Of course, Alonso takes this as well as can be expected...and kills Larry. Sam is down in the hallway -- I can't remember what he was doing down there, actually -- and hears Larry's scream of pain, coming across the body too late. After that, both boys are in the room with Marissa, telling her about her dead husband and finding out how to kill her brother.

Poor Marissa is having a really bad day.

They head down to the basement -- where Marissa said that Alonso spends most of his time -- armed with silver knives. They head to the basement door, but the lights are off. Dean finds flashlights and they go down the stairs, stepping over a smear of blood on the floor and split up, each taking one direction of the hall and checking the doors. Dean finds a janitor's closet with empty jars of what could have been fat...maybe tinged with blood? It was gross, that's all I know. Sam finds the pudding chef dead like Larry and keeps moving forward until he finds a portable closet of clothes.

Just as he turns, though, the closet is knocked over on top of him, pinning him to the floor as Alonso jumps on top of it saying that the fat makes him stronger. Sam's all, yep, that's what your sister said before she ratted you out.

Alonso thinks Sam is a lying liar who lies and tries to tentacle his face; Sam pushes him and the closet off, getting free, but losing sight of Alonso. He taunts him, drawing him out and they fight -- in the dark, so it wasn't that easy to see. Mainly Sam was holding his own until he got literally kicked through a wall (ouch!) then Alonso was on top of him, strangling him and trying to slither-suck his neck when Dean swoops in, cuts off the tentacle and kills Alonso, saving Sam.

In the aftermath, the authorities come in to take care of the bodies and such and Marissa is sitting off to herself, looking devastated. Sam walks over and she says in a small, broken voice that she lost her whole family that day. Dean draws Sam to the side and tells him that once the place clears out, they have to make it a family affair.

Sam: We're not going to kill Marissa!

Dean: She's a monster.

Sam: Who saved our asses!

Dean (eyes hard): You said that you wanted to keep things strictly business. Well, we're in the business of killing monsters.

Sam (bitch-face set on full): I wanted to keep things strictly business between us. But I still have a heart. What if I had crossed paths back when I was possessed by Gadreel? I would've ended up dead, too. Would I have deserved that? Would I have deserved to die?

Dean looks like he's reining in a torrent of words, swallowing them down and resigning himself to the fact that Sam will win this one. Again. With the exception of Benny and Amy, Sam's pretty much the one to decide which monsters get to live or die and Dean complies with his assessment. Except for Benny, Dean's been pretty black-and-white with his initial reaction to monsters: they die. Even when it came to Garth's new family, Dean wanted to kill them. He wasn't too keen on killing Garth, of course, but the family, in his eyes were monsters and he needed convincing they should be allowed to live. Sam's the one who plays Monster God and Dean knows it. When he's crossed Sam -- i.e., Benny and Amy -- it's wrecked their relationship for months and he can't afford to rip it apart more.

Dean: So. One-way ticket to Peru?

The boys leave Canyon Valley and head back to the bunker. Later, Dean's sitting in the bunker kitchen alone, sipping whiskey and Sam sticks his head in the door saying he's going to bed.

Dean: Hey. About what you said the other day.

Sam (leaning against the doorframe looking ready to be pissy): I thought it didn't bother you.

Dean: Y'know, Sam...I saved your hide back there. And I saved your hide at that church. And the hospital.

Sam rolls his eyes all, ORLY?

Dean: I may not think things all the way through, okay. But what I do, I do because it's the right thing. (Picks up his glass) I'd do it again.

He's never really been that great with words. I knew immediately the "right thing" phrasing would trigger Sam.

Sam: And that is the problem.

Dean freezes.

Sam: You think you're my savior, my brother the hero. You swoop in and even when you mess up you think that what you're doing is worth it because you've convinced yourself you're doing more good than bad. But you're not.

Dean = wounded eyes.

That hurt. I'll admit. I'm not sure what Sam is trying to do here, but what he is doing is totally breaking down every support structure Dean has in place that keeps him able to move forward every day.

Sam: Kevin's dead, Crowley's in the wind, we're not closer to beating this angel thing. Please tell me: what is the upside of me being alive?

Dean: You kidding me? You and me. Fighting the good fight together.

Like they both agreed they wanted to do, should do, would do. Sam's allowed to change his mind about that, but it's not fair to expect Dean to accept it and it's definitely not fair to blame Dean for continuing down a path he didn't realize Sam wasn't on anymore.

Sam (big, frustrated sigh): Okay. (Sits down across from Dean, causing Dean to draw back a bit in almost instinctive protection) Just once, be honest with me. You didn't save me for me. You did it for you.

Dean (looking completely caught off guard, confused): What are you talking about?

Sam: I was ready to die. I should have died. But you didn't want to be alone. That's what all this boils down to. You can't stand the thought of being alone.

Dean looks hurt, shocked that this is what his brother thinks of him. This is what Sam believes is the honest truth. And the thing is, there is truth to that. Dean didn't want to be alone. He's never wanted that -- he could have found John on his own, but he didn't want to, each time Sam has walked away from him, Dean's sought for him to come back or accepted him back because he believes they're better together, they're more balanced as a team, safer as a family.

But if Sam thinks that's the only reason Dean saved him, then he really doesn't know his brother at all. The hospital was just the latest string in a series of choices Dean has made, all his life, to save Sam. He didn't save Sam because he was afraid of being alone, he saved Sam because he didn't want to lose Sam. He's been alone. He's been on his own. He just doesn't want to live in a world without Sam in it -- and he's said as much. The fact that Sam doesn't think about this side of the truth with that statement he threw toward Dean has me shaking my head.

Dean (gets up, turns away): All right.

Sam: I'll give you this much. You are certainly willing to do the sacrifice. As long as you're not the one being hurt.

Okay, sorry, what? This is where he really lost me. I don't even know if I can go the "he's hurting/angry so he's lashing out" route with this...it's like he's forgotten so much of their history. All Dean does is hurt. Physically, mentally, emotionally. Skipping over speculations of what happened before the show -- like Dean continually stepping between John and Sam to break up their fights and sacrificing his childhood to make sure Sam was cared for, protected, safe....

What about sacrificing his soul to Hell so that Sam could live? I can guarandamntee you that being ripped apart by Hellhounds hurt. Or how about killing his friend, Benny, to get Sam out of Purgatory? That hurt. Or leaving Lisa and Ben to rejoin Sam in the hunt because Sam was back and said he needed him? If Sam doesn't think that was painful, I don't know what to say.

But, while I was busy thinking of reason after reason for why what Sam said was the most ridiculous thing I'd ever heard, Dean decides to try a different tactic, perhaps thinking that it wouldn't do any good to try to combat Sam's purging with his own version of the truth when Sam was sitting so squarely inside his own righteousness.

Dean: All right...you want to be honest? If the situation were reversed, you'd do the same thing.

Sam: No, Dean. I wouldn't. Same circumstances, I wouldn't.

Dean looks like Sam just hit him in the solar plexus. He doesn't really look like he's even breathing there for a moment. As Sam heads to bed, Dean simply stands there, staring after him, looking gutted. And the interesting thing is, while I was immediately on the defense about the "you're not the one being hurt" comment, here I could actually see both sides.

For Sam, he's saying he'd give Dean the respect he doesn't feel Dean's ever given him. Same circumstances, Dean ready to die, etc., Sam would respect that and let him go. He'd have hated it, but he would've done it. In a way, it's almost like he's saying, see? I can do for you what you can never do for me. The bottom line is, he's saying he wouldn't do the same thing Dean did because it's not what he would have wanted. So, in a weird way, while he wouldn't be saving Dean's life, he would actually be doing the same thing -- Sam would be doing for Dean what Sam wants and not what Dean wants, just as he accused Dean of doing for him what Dean wanted, not what Sam wanted.

And now I'm talking in circles, but I think you get me. At least I hope so.

However, Dean...he didn't hear any of that. All he heard was that where he did whatever was necessary to save Sam's life as he's always done, if the roles were reversed, Sam would let him die. All Dean heard was that it didn't matter how much he'd sacrificed for Sam -- it didn't matter that he'd spent his childhood watching out for Sammy, or that he died to save Sam's life, or that he'd died to save Sam's soul, or that he'd killed one of his friends to save Sam's life...none of that mattered. When it came down to it, Sam would let Dean die.

And that hit him like a physical blow, you could see it in his eyes.

"It's those we live with and should know who elude us. But we can still love them. We can love them completely, without complete understanding."

These guys live in each other's pockets; they're so close they should be psychic. But because of that closeness, that co-dependency that we've all come to depend on, they've put up walls and made assumptions and it's starting to become clear with this purge of truth from one that there are things about who they are that still elude them. And they either have to overcome the assumptions and see both sides of the truth...or they have to choose to love without complete understanding, if they're ever going to come back together again.

Because all this growing and maturing and conflict for the sake of the story is starting to break my heart. In all honesty, I'm kinda glad we have a two week break until they come back so that I can get my bearings again and find my way back to being entertained and letting the story just happen.

Okay, sorry for the surplus of opining in this Ramble. Let me hear yours. And I'll try to reply to all of them this time.

A closing PSA -- I'll be in Sydney, Aus for work on the 25th, so that Ramble will be late...probably around Friday or Saturday Australia time. Hope you'll come back to check it out.

Slainte!

Comments

( 131 Tall Tales — Tell Me A Story )
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impala1967
Feb. 5th, 2014 07:56 am (UTC)
oh wow , again you sumed it up so well for me that theres not really much more I can add.

I could bitch and moan about what an asshole Sam is but come on , he's always been self centred, thinking about himself first. So tonight he just finally got the chance to put Dean in his place and set the record straight ... as if we didn't all know it when he left Dean in purgatory. I got a bit of a jealousy vibe from Sam in his rant , about Dean being the hero, coming in and saving the day ... well if he wants to be a hero one place to start is stop being a prick to his brother, the one who raised him and kept him as safe as can be.

And Dean , I wish that after tonight he would leave Sam to it. Sam has bascially said that life would go on if Dean wasn't around so I wish he and Cas would leave Sam to it ... only that entails Dean leaving a place he calls home ... so maybe Sam should go. I have to say at the end I just hung my head and cried 'Dean' . my heart hurt for him so much . Each week this is going to kill him a little more and thats why I think they need to seperate, Dean needs to find a purpose outside of Sam. I'm not happy he's hitting the hard stuff again and where is Cas when Dean needs him so much.

I have to cross my fingers and hope that 'the mark' will bring Dean close to the edge and that is what Sam needs to see that Dean is more than just a hunter to him. Am I hoping to hard, I can understand all the trials etc and the hurt now if it leads to Sam saving Dean in the finale.

I had an aweful thought before the show, if they only have 10 seasons the boys have said they want to go out like Butch and Sundance .... what if Dean is the only one to die and Sam goes on to have that apple pie life ... and tonights episode makes that seem more of an option now more than ever.

I don't want a week break but I think I might watch the last 3 episodes back to back to get it all clear in my head before the next one.

Enjoy Aussie, they are having sweltering temps at the moment

hugs

J
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 02:55 am (UTC)
I got a bit of a jealousy vibe from Sam in his rant , about Dean being the hero, coming in and saving the day ... well if he wants to be a hero one place to start is stop being a prick to his brother, the one who raised him and kept him as safe as can be.

Agreed. He sounded a bit...petulant. I have to figure that's not the way they intended him to sound, so I was trying to look at it from his POV...but not having much luck.

I have to cross my fingers and hope that 'the mark' will bring Dean close to the edge and that is what Sam needs to see that Dean is more than just a hunter to him.

I'm hoping this right along with you. I know they have like...10 more episodes to go this season which is plenty of time to get this figured out, but right now it's hard to see a clear path to where they're going with the bros relationship.

I hope I packed right for this trip! Let's see...a closet full of sweaters for a KS winter...3 days in a conference room...and swealtering temps outside. YIKES! :)

Talk soon, J! :)
spike247uk
Feb. 5th, 2014 09:51 am (UTC)
thanks for another awesome review, you really help me to put my feelings into words as I've been devastated with the last few episodes.

I don't have your eloquence (or others on here that have commented as well) - but I really am struggling with the interaction with the boys, and how Sam seems to be forgetting how he promised in S8 that he wanted to live, that he wanted to show Dean that these trials didn't need to end in death.....and now he's taking all that back?!?

I get that Sam's angry, and needs to vent at the person he blames for pulling him back and lying to him for so long. But the way he's doing it, destroying all the foundations Deans build around himself for so many years is frankly childish, and he's not pulling any punches.

As for Dean, I wish he'd bloody stand up for himself and shout back, but he won't, and the series will continue with Sam and his self righteous diatribe at Dean, and Dean just taking it.

I'm trying so hard to stay with the show and hoping it leads me out of this black hole we're in currently, but my faith is being tested every week. If this continues for much longer I'm not sure I'm going to like the show anymore, and will leave for pastures new :(
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 02:59 am (UTC)
but I really am struggling with the interaction with the boys, and how Sam seems to be forgetting how he promised in S8 that he wanted to live, that he wanted to show Dean that these trials didn't need to end in death.....and now he's taking all that back?!?

Yeah, I don't really get it right now, either. I have to believe, though, that the writers have some kind of plan -- but it's hard to see the path they have the bros on right now going anywhere positive. I'm in it for the long haul, though, and won't give up hope!

If you do decide to leave our boys, I hope you'll swing by here once in awhile and check in -- that's the worst thing about people losing faith in the show, I think. I so enjoy conversing with everyone, y'know?
palomacal
Feb. 5th, 2014 09:56 am (UTC)
Honestly, i'm really sorry to say this after 9 seasons, but I'm starting to think that this is just bad writing. How can they have Sam talking about showing the light to Dean, then saying how happy he was with their life at the bunker, then in the church saying all that about not wanting to disappoint Dean again ... and now saying all those things about Dean thinking he is his hero brother, practically saying that he's just selfish and all his motivations in life are not being alone, that he has done more bad than good ....

Please, let the next weeks prove me wrong but I don't see this going in a good direction. I get that Sam is hurt and with good reason and that there is some true in what he said about Dean not wanting to be alone and making bad decisions because of that, but to come to those conclusions .... Meh!! They've literally forgotten that all Dean had to do at the church and with Death was asking for Sam to stay with him and Sam just jumped on that wagon. I really hope they adress those facts in the future. It's like the arguments are lacking consistency (I hope this literal translation from spanish makes sense in english).

I'm afraid that what we are going to get is a more "mature" Dean accepting that Sam is right and his feelings be dammed. I'm even hoping to hear Cain say how worthy he is and not exactly as a killer because I seriously don't expect Sam thinking it any time soon. I was even happy to hear Crowley say it. It's depressing to see the character being put down in such a way after everything he's been through for his family and for all the innocents they've come across. I feel like he is being diminished.

Anyway, I'm one of those lurkers that always read and never comment but that truly appreciate your efforts at reviewing every episode. You are going to laugh at this but lately I always have to read your comments straight after finishing watching the episode to try and "suck out" your optimism ;). I wish I would have discovered you in season 4.

Hasta siempre.
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:03 am (UTC)
How can they have Sam talking about showing the light to Dean, then saying how happy he was with their life at the bunker, then in the church saying all that about not wanting to disappoint Dean again ... and now saying all those things about Dean thinking he is his hero brother, practically saying that he's just selfish and all his motivations in life are not being alone, that he has done more bad than good ....

Right??? It has to be going somewhere.

People say random things when they're hurt/angry. I really hope that's what this is, too. But this time, Sam doesn't have a spell or a siren or a curse to blame it on. It's all him. And the things he's saying don't add up -- even to things he said earlier this year (at the boys' home, for example).

Your translation is spot on and I agree with you -- and so pleased you "de-lurked" to comment. I hope I can continue to infuse optimism into each review so that you find the joy that we all look for when watching our boys.

Slainte!
(Anonymous)
Feb. 5th, 2014 10:21 am (UTC)
Maz
Thanks for the ramble - your thoughts always crystallise my own.
After last week's debacle of an episode didn't even want to read or think any more about it - it was so depressing in so many, many ways but this week at least brought some fun (Dean's hairnet. the sheriff, the donut sugar....). However, all that stuff at the end? It's really dull and lazy IMHO how the writers for the last three weeks are sticking all the emotional exposition onto the end - they're paid for this stuff, they should at least have the skill to work it into the flow of the story line a bit, y'know just for variety and, well, realism. The actors have the ability for it and it would break a boringly predictable pattern. I mean, the guys are in the car for hours, they share a room - but they always wait til they're home to have these discussions just for the "duh,dud duh" effect. It irritates!
As to Sam's words.... yeah, well, I guess the writers have to keep the Winchester angst going somehow right? but really sometimes it's like they don't know these characters or their stories at all.
I could *kind* of see Sam's reasoning and my only hope for it is that Dean is finally going to get an epic life threatening plot line (Cain!Cain!Cain! so much awesome possibility in there at last) that will negate all that Sam has said - let him face the sort of decisions that Dean has had to face for once and let's see where he goes.
Oh and the only thing I need to say about recent eps .... Jensen Ackles! Beautiful! The man does hurt (god, that last look!), funny and badass better than ANYONE.
Have fun in Aus.
Maz X
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:07 am (UTC)
Re: Maz
MAZ! I'm so pleased to see you. I don't know if you'll come back to see this comment, but in case you do: (((HUUUUGS))).

they're paid for this stuff, they should at least have the skill to work it into the flow of the story line a bit, y'know just for variety and, well, realism

That made me LOL! :)

Jensen has been AMAZING in these last few episodes and has looked even better (if that's even possible). I just love love love LOVE the way he plays Dean Winchester, even if the show has me WTF-ing all over the place. :)

I'm at the gate waiting for my flight to Sydney and there's a flight going to London across the way. Wish I were heading that way to see you. :)
hunenka
Feb. 5th, 2014 10:28 am (UTC)
Hi, long-time lurking fan of your rambles here. I don’t usually do this, but this episode hurt me so much I felt like I needed to voice my thoughts somewhere, so I figured I’d do it here, in reaction to your wonderful recap/summary, with which I wholeheartedly agree.

On the topic of Dean willing to make sacrifices as long as he’s not the one being hurt:

1. What about the events of Swan Song? Back in that episode, Sam asked Dean to trust him, to let him jump in the Cage with Lucifer, and Dean did. Sam is the most precious, most important thing in Dean’s life. And he knew what was waiting for Sam in the Cage – an eternity of torture with the Devil himself, without doubt so much worse than what Dean’s gone through during his own stint in Hell. It’s practically Dean’s worst-case scenario. And still he let Sam take that jump. If that isn’t a sacrifice that hurts Dean, then I don’t know what is.

2. The same could be said about Trial and Error. Again, Sam asked Dean to trust him, to let him do the Trials, which they both knew was extremely dangerous. And again, Dean let him.

Also, Sam said in that episode that he wanted to survive the Trials, he wanted to live, probably go back to that normal, apple pie life he's always dreamt about. He wasn’t considering it a suicide mission like Dean was. So later, in Sacrifice, when all the weight of the Trials pulled him down and he forgot about his dream, about his whole “I wanna survive it” speech, Dean was there to remind him, and finally managed to convince Sam to want to live again. Sam gave up the Trials willingly so he could live. So how the hell can he now blame Dean for not letting him die in I Think I’m Gonna Like It Here?

So, I totally get that Sam’s pissed about the whole angel possession deal, because that was a huge violation on Dean’s part, no arguments here. But being angry at Dean for convincing him to fight again? Especially after that scene in the church where Sam clearly expressed his desire to live by giving up the Trials? That’s low.

And what’s even a lower blow is saying that Dean did it just because he couldn’t stand being alone. As you said, there is a big chunk of truth to that, but it’s definitely not all there is. Going back to Sam’s speech in Trial and Error, Sam said he sees the end at the end of the tunnel, and Dean said repeatedly all throughout the second half of season 8 that he wants to see Sam have that life. But Sam having that normal, happy life? Would totally mean Dean hunting on his own (because Dean sees himself as being a hunter until the day he dies), not having Sam by his side all the time. So no, Sam, Dean didn’t save you just so he wouldn’t be alone.


Edited at 2014-02-05 10:28 am (UTC)
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:09 am (UTC)
Hello there!

Thank you so much for "de-lurking" to comment. I've enjoyed reading your thoughts! I hope you return.

Back in that episode, Sam asked Dean to trust him, to let him jump in the Cage with Lucifer, and Dean did.

RIGHT?! That plus copious amounts of other examples has me TOTALLY NOT GETTING where Sam was coming from when he said that.

Sam said he sees the end at the end of the tunnel, and Dean said repeatedly all throughout the second half of season 8 that he wants to see Sam have that life. But Sam having that normal, happy life? Would totally mean Dean hunting on his own (because Dean sees himself as being a hunter until the day he dies), not having Sam by his side all the time.

EXACTLY. *sigh*

I hope we get some clarity on where Sam's head is at with all of this, because he's frustrating me all to pieces at the moment.

Thanks again for commenting.
kitap
Feb. 5th, 2014 11:04 am (UTC)
Dean gave up a normal life at the Boy's Ranch place to return to the family. Dean gave up his childhood for Sam. Dean let Ben and Lisa go. Hell, Dean let Charlie go. Dean had himself killed to go make a bargain with Death.

These are not selfish choices with no repercussions. Dean also knew and accepted the results.

The episode amused me- I liked how the husband was all "fat sucker? We'll open a spa resort! We'll make millions!"

That said I believe her name was Maritza not Marissa.
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:13 am (UTC)

The episode amused me- I liked how the husband was all "fat sucker? We'll open a spa resort! We'll make millions!"


HAHA! I know, right? That's hilarious.

Oh, Maritza? Huh. Oh, well...I'm too lazy to go back and change it now. I believe you, but it was hard to tell when listening. :)

Thanks for commenting!
eastofwind
Feb. 5th, 2014 11:59 am (UTC)
My thoughts - It's Brutal
Hi there :)

My thought on this episode is that the writers is pushing Dean further to the abyss and the only friend he's got is an angel and a demon literally.

The belief and foundation of Dean is torn apart and I don't know what the writers plan but it's brutal.

At the kitchen,when Dean said about research on the Mark of Cain, Sam just took it like a very normal thing to have the mark. While Dean, looking for the flip-side of getting the mark. He is not suicidal but albeit too focus on one thing the other can be fix later.

When the situation is reverse, Sam always go to the extreme like;
1. The Kids Are Alright - in cahoots with demon
2. Mystery spot - killing Bobby (even though it not actually Bobby)
3. Time Is on My Side - making Dean a living basically Zombie
4. Lazarus Rising - again with demon
5. On the Head of a Pin - drinking demon blood and supercharge Sam to the rescue
6. When the Levee Breaks - choose Ruby with righteous anger that he's doing it for Dean
7. Good God, Y'All! - when Sam feel that he's justified with the decision he made to kill Lillith
8.The Curious Case of Dean Winchester - he gamble with his life
Just some the example... :p

As Sam said that Dean couldn't life alone, he did give Sam choice to leave the hunter life. Dean reason for this is, it's a least Sam get the normal life while Dean can focus on the hunter life. Plenty of time Dean try to get Sam leave but SAM did chose the life of a hunter. Now to throw it all back at Dean, its just mean and vicious.

Sam did chose to live but all that is buried under righteous anger. :)

Love your rambling and pardon my English.


Edited at 2014-02-05 12:58 pm (UTC)
darkrose_9
Feb. 5th, 2014 09:33 pm (UTC)
Re: My thoughts - It's Brutal
I think I see what you mean. Basically, Sam doesn't want to hunt (which involves making choices in which people get hurt) because it's gotten to the point where if he commits fully, he turns into a monster.

Sam hasn't really been "Sam" since season 5. He was soulless in season 6, crazy in season 7, trying to reconnect with Dean (who had been missing for a year) in season 8, and possessed for a half of season 9.

I'm interested in where show goes in the future with Sam's character. I don't think they'll have too much long to fix this.
Re: My thoughts - It's Brutal - gaelicspirit - Feb. 24th, 2014 03:16 am (UTC) - Expand
sl_walker
Feb. 5th, 2014 01:10 pm (UTC)
Totally random lurker who wants to give you kudos for mentioning Maclean's quite masterful writing. ;)
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:17 am (UTC)
*virtual high-five*

Love the book, loved the movie. And can't get over how many things I can apply his words to in my life. :)
cathy1967
Feb. 5th, 2014 01:16 pm (UTC)
Another wonderful ramble. When this show ends, what will I do then? I can't even imagine life without your rambles. :)

I agree with you every step of the way. Heck, even Jared agrees with you, if his tweet "@jarpad: sam can be a real jerk sometimes.... ‪#‎Supernatural‬" is anything to go by. :)

And yes, I think he's being a bit of a jerk. He may be hurting and he may feel wronged ... but, come on, man. Can't he see that Dean's hanging on by his fingernails? Now he wants him to go waving his hands around? - Metaphorically speaking, of course.

And his comment that he would let Dean die if the shoe was on the other foot? Uh ... no, you wouldn't, you bitch. He's sacrificed a life to save Dean from dying. I mean, what the hell? Where does he get the right to come off all righteous all of a sudden? Just because he was willing to die? Dean was willing to die back then, 8 frigging years ago. If Sam had done what he now claims he would, Dean and the whole frigging world could have been spared a truckload of agony. So, get off your high horse, Samantha. Sheesh!

Sorry ... I generally like Sam. Honest, I do. But he just overstepped the line. And there's no buffer between Dean and this truckload of horse manure Sam just dumped on him. Somebody needs to slap some sense into him. *pets Dean*

Okay, I'm done. And now we have to wait 20 frigging days for the next episode? *grumbles* You're not making it easy on us, are you, Show?

Thanks for your time. I'm looking forward to the next one. And I don't care that it'll be late. As long as it's coming. :D
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:21 am (UTC)
Maybe after the show ends I'll write something else you'll want to read. :)

Heh -- I didn't realize Jared tweeted that. Funny.

He's sacrificed a life to save Dean from dying. I mean, what the hell? Where does he get the right to come off all righteous all of a sudden? Just because he was willing to die? Dean was willing to die back then, 8 frigging years ago.

Right??

And there's no buffer between Dean and this truckload of horse manure Sam just dumped on him

That's the part that really stings. There's no spell or siren or curse that can be blamed for this. This is all Sam. *frowns*

Thanks for reading and commenting. I'll get the next one up as soon as I can. :)
alleysweeper
Feb. 5th, 2014 01:23 pm (UTC)
The first thing that struck me is this was the second episode (in a row, no less) where the MoTW (Marissa) was not evil. They chose to let her live. I'm wondering if this is setting up a background for the spin-off.

Dean: Rudy was on. (I'm with Dean - have to watch this every time it's on TV.) Then Unforgiven.

LOL...I heard the names and thought Supertramp and Metallica


Sam seems to have suffered some selective memory loss. He's not the paragon of virtue he's claiming to be here:

S1 - Faith - Sam took Dean to a faith healer without his consent which ended up with the death of an innocent man on Dean's behalf. A death that Dean shoulders the blame for.

S3 - Time is on My Side - Sam misleads Dean into looking at zombie case while he tries to get a journal on eternal life to use on Dean.

S3 - Jus in Bello Sam is willing to sacrifice the virgin. 'Nuff said.

S3 - Robo!Sam is willing to do anything, including killing Bobby, to get his brother back.

S5 - Sam takes up with Ruby and drinks her blood to gain strength to save Dean from Hell. He even tries to make a crossroads deal of his own.

S5 - The End The brothers went their separate ways a few weeks before. Sam gets the Hell scared out of him by Lucifer (no pun intended)and immediately calls Dean and wants to get back together . Like every kid, he runs towards safety.

S2 - The whole season ALL we heard was Sam whine about turning evil and Dean did what? He reassured and comforted, the bastard. What a shitty brother.

S4 - Dean gets out of Hell and Sam did what? He BooHoo'd Dean and left him alone with his nightmares while he sneaked out with Ruby to suck blood.

Dean didn't want to be alone. He's never wanted that

I think to Dean, alone isn't just being by himself. As a child he was 'alone' with Sam's welfare front and center. This meant fear and hunger and responsibility that only DEAN had to shoulder and starting at such a young age, in such dire conditions, 'alone' must have been a terrifying place. He will never want to be alone again. And fucking Sam throws a hissy fit if Dean makes a friend.

Anyway, great Ramble, as always!

Rock On!
Alley


Edited at 2014-02-05 01:29 pm (UTC)
qultng1
Feb. 5th, 2014 02:46 pm (UTC)
What a shitty brother indeed!!!
(no subject) - darkrose_9 - Feb. 5th, 2014 09:39 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - gaelicspirit - Feb. 24th, 2014 03:25 am (UTC) - Expand
ladyarcherfan3
Feb. 5th, 2014 01:42 pm (UTC)
Thank you for your insightful and entertaining Ramble yet again. Sometimes it is one of the few things that helps me process an episode (which is kinda sad that I need to emotionally process an episode of any TV show...)

I was rather disappointed with this episode, though your Ramble did help me pick up a few of the highlights, even if they were just pretty things. But the first thing that annoyed me was the MN accent thing. It was all "Yay, MN!" Then "no, I strongly doubt the accent is that thick in Stillwater. I've been there." It's a stupid little thing, but still. :)

I did have hope that the brothers would actually make steps forwards to working out their issues, with how Sam reacted when Dean was drugged - all the "Hulk Smash who's put my brother (and other people) in danger?" and the general badassery of them hunting towards the end. But apparently not. And I'm either calling bad writing (cuz that's what it felt like, you cannot tell me that Sam has forgotten all the insanity he did when Dean's life was on the line, as least further in their past if not so much recently. If they had wanted to show some sort of growth away from the codependency from Sam, the lines maybe should have had something like, "not any more, I've learned my lesson about messing with the natural order" or something.) But there is also a theory I saw running around on Tumblr to do with the mythology of The Mark of Cain, that " curses the bearer from living as a family unit." I haven't done much digging yet to see where that idea came from, but if that's the deal, at least they are tying Sam's words into the mythology, albeit clumsily.

(I feel as if I vented all over you with this comment. I am sorry.)

Have fun in Sydney, and I look forward to seeing your Ramble for the next episode whenever you get it up. :)
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:28 am (UTC)
Hon, I am always emotionally processing this show! LOL! So you're among friends there. :)

The accent made me think more...Fargo than MN, to be honest.

Vent away! That's what the ramble is for! :)

But there is also a theory I saw running around on Tumblr to do with the mythology of The Mark of Cain, that " curses the bearer from living as a family unit." I haven't done much digging yet to see where that idea came from, but if that's the deal, at least they are tying Sam's words into the mythology, albeit clumsily.

Oh, interesting -- I haven't seen that. I wonder....

Now I'll be watching with a bit of a head-tilt on this theory. ;)

Thank you for reading and commenting!
amberdreams
Feb. 5th, 2014 02:22 pm (UTC)
My feelings pretty much match yours except I'm probably less angry with Sam - I think some of what he said was justified, and I suppose I'm not surprised he added some 'extras' that hurt, because that's what families do. They know each others' weaknesses and when the knives come out they are extra sharp - Dean's done the very same thing when he's accused Sam of things that happened when he was soulless, for instance.

When I've had time to reflect some more, I think I will say this was a really good episode... But I am apprehensive of where this is all leading us (and them!).
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:30 am (UTC)
They know each others' weaknesses and when the knives come out they are extra sharp - Dean's done the very same thing when he's accused Sam of things that happened when he was soulless, for instance.

Fair point about family. I guess I saw what Dean said to Sam about things that happened when he was soulless differently -- but perhaps that's because I tend to be 90% sympathetic to Dean's side.

I'm also apprehensive, but ready to see where they take us!! :)

Thanks for reading and commenting.
(no subject) - amberdreams - Feb. 24th, 2014 08:50 am (UTC) - Expand
qultng1
Feb. 5th, 2014 02:43 pm (UTC)
I don't know. I just don't know. The end of this ep just tore me apart. I wanted to shake Dean and ask him why he thought it would be different...Sam didn't even look for him when he was in Purgatory.

I also said earlier to someone of FB that I wanted to chase after Sam and grab him so I could climb on that box and slap him HARD; hard enough to knock him off that high horse he's riding. His holier than thou attitude is wearing a little thin.

For the most part I enjoyed this ep and Hubs even watched it with me. :D I'm really not enjoying the bumpiness of this part of the road, tho.

I too am glad for this break for the Olympics. I'm going to watch some amazing people do amazing things and give myself a break. Hee
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:32 am (UTC)
I wanted to shake Dean and ask him why he thought it would be different...Sam didn't even look for him when he was in Purgatory

Because you always hope. Because when you've made someone the focal point of your life, you always want to believe they'll return the same to you, or they'll see you for who you are, or they'll love you for what you've done. Because you can't give up, not even when they push you away, simply because you don't know how to give up on them. It's not in your DNA. It would be like cutting off a limb and then letting yourself bleed out.

And until your comment I totally didn't realize the break was because of the Olympics! LOL! :)

Thanks for reading and commenting.
lausbub0402
Feb. 5th, 2014 02:44 pm (UTC)
OK, deep breath - I stumbled over your episode reviews right after we got back from hiatus and although I'm mostly a lurker in the background (sorry) I just had to leave a comment this time (please excuse my English, it's not my first language).
I dunno how you do this, but right after I finish watching the episodes I come here to read what you have to say about it and please believe me, so far I have always agreed with every single word and thought of yours. Sometimes I feel like you must be in my head, able to read my thoughts and feelings and the way you express them here, it's just wow.
I mean I've read some of your stories so I already knew how awesome you are with words and getting into the characters of Sam and Dean, but this? Just wow!
I can't thank you enough for doing this. The last couple of episodes I've been so upset with the endings, but reading your reviews always helps to calm me down. Geez, I feel so sorry for Dean right now and I have no clue where the writers are gonna take this, but one thing's for sure, I will be back for your next review and looking forward to reading it as much as I'm looking forward to a new episode.
Le dea mhein!
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:33 am (UTC)
Welcome! Your English is just fine and I really appreciate you commenting! If you for any reason want to read past reviews, all of them are collected here: http://gaelicspirit.livejournal.com/75190.html

I love that the rambles resonate with you! :) I just watch, then react, so I'm glad that it all works for you. :)

Dean's breaking my heart and I'm ever hopeful that the writers are taking us all somewhere we want to go! :)

Thanks again for reading and commenting.
yohkobennington
Feb. 5th, 2014 02:54 pm (UTC)
I think Cas is looking for Gadreel and the other douchebag I can't remember his name without thinking of Metatron.

I read on tumblr: The Mark of Cain actually comes with the curse, which , amongst other things, curses the bearer from living as a family unit. It takes away your family. It took away Cain’s family, and it’s taking Sam away from Dean. As to explain why Sam is being so harsh to Dean, and that maybe that's part of the price you pay for wearing the mark.

Well, maybe, who knows.

I just know know one thing:

Sam Winchester,
 photo tumblr_mhpodoehJq1qf6wdno2_250_zpse755db0c.gif

Edited at 2014-02-05 02:54 pm (UTC)
yohkobennington
Feb. 5th, 2014 03:15 pm (UTC)
You do not kick a person when it's already down.
No you know what no, Im still pissed. That wasn't enough.

Because where does Sam comes off to say those things to Dean. Like don't you see he's not sleeping, the empty bottle of whiskey next to him? And you ask if he's okay. Wow, are you stupid of just playing one?

Being angry does not give you the right to be an asshole.

Sam is being such an hypocrite with the I wouldnt save you shit. Yeah, right because when Dean was going to die from his heart and was ready to do so, you let him die. And okay, that was back then and people change. But the situation never would be the same because Dean would do anything to stay alive if it means keeping Sam safe.

And that's the core of it. Dean can be alone. What he cannot do is not having Sam safe, because it was drilled into him and it's not something he can just freaking turn off. So accusing him that he saved Sam for merely selfish reasons is going too far.

If this is not the Mark of Cain doing, I am done with Sam. There is no way I can like him anymore if he's being this spiteful all on himself. The Sam I liked was the emphatic, let's see the shades of grays, and find a nicer solution Sam. Not this asshole.


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queeberquabbler
Feb. 5th, 2014 03:21 pm (UTC)
I think Sam's anger was justified. He was hurt, he was wronged. I've never denied that. But the words he's now choosing in order to express the results of processing that anger are hurtful and in many respects untrue.

This exactly. As the old saying goes, it's not what you say, it's how you SAY it. He could have been truthful without being hurtful. That is why I'm having a lot of problems sympathizing with him right now.
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:36 am (UTC)
He could have been truthful without being hurtful

Yep.

*shakes head*

Wonder where this is all going to lead.....
jj1564
Feb. 5th, 2014 03:50 pm (UTC)
'But if Sam thinks that's the only reason Dean saved him, then he really doesn't know his brother at all. ..... He didn't save Sam because he was afraid of being alone, he saved Sam because he didn't want to lose Sam..... The fact that Sam doesn't think about this side of the truth with that statement he threw toward Dean has me shaking my head.'
Thank you, this exactly summed up how I feel about 'bitch face' Sam! And to say Dean only makes sacrifices that don't hurt him was just so wrong!
Dean is at such a low point and every bitter word from Sam is like the stab of a knife, slicing away at Dean's self-worth. Poor Dean, it's relentlessly awful for him right now, but thankfully he looks freaking lovely when he's sad!
By the way, I loved that shot of him stretched out on the bed and the messy hair too!
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:37 am (UTC)
By the way, I loved that shot of him stretched out on the bed and the messy hair too!

UNF -- right??? I mean, what was about that?! LOL! He just makes me want to cuddle him and climb him at the same time. (was that out loud?)

Thanks for reading and commenting. :)
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grean
Feb. 5th, 2014 04:02 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much for this review. You manage to put most of it in perspective without resorting to bashing Sam's head. I was so angry last night and so hurt for Dean so again thanks. I can't add to your wonderful summary you caught it all in closing I love yohkobennington's adorable gif and I second it.
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:38 am (UTC)
Well, good. I mean, I don't want to bash Sam...I just want to understand where he's coming from and right now...that's hard.

Thanks for reading and commenting. :)
tarynelliott
Feb. 5th, 2014 04:03 pm (UTC)
Seriously...my head hurts. Seeing both sides of the argument is exhausting.

But I do. </p>

And yet my sympathies do lie w Dean. I don't know if Sam realizes the amt of reprogramming it will take to make Dean see this. His formative years were all about protecting Sam. Those ingrained habits are hard to break in the best of circumstances let alone when they're constantly put in danger. There is no real downtime in their messed up lives. And the world continually puts them both in peril. ESPECIALLY Sam.

Dean never has a moment to feel safe. And he surely never thinks Sam is safe.

And I'm going to give an unpopular opinion. Sam has allowed himself to be put in this situation. Yes there are other things at play and HELL YES Dean has done wrong. But Sam has got to show Dean that he can stand up alone. That he wants to live. That he doesn't have a death wish. Because all Dean sees is that when he does try to let Sam find his own way it ends in disaster or martyrdom.

gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:39 am (UTC)
I don't know if Sam realizes the amt of reprogramming it will take to make Dean see this. His formative years were all about protecting Sam. Those ingrained habits are hard to break in the best of circumstances let alone when they're constantly put in danger. There is no real downtime in their messed up lives. And the world continually puts them both in peril. ESPECIALLY Sam.

YES!

Sam has allowed himself to be put in this situation

WORD!

Thank you for taking time to read and comment because YES -- I totally agree. And I'm now forever anxious about where this is all going. *meep*

belbelleb
Feb. 5th, 2014 04:27 pm (UTC)
The writers MUST have something up their sleeves, because this storyline is destroying me. I adore Sam, but this angry, hard, unforgivably cruel Sam is breaking my heart. No matter how angry he is, he's a better man than this.
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:39 am (UTC)
I totally agree.
(Anonymous)
Feb. 5th, 2014 05:36 pm (UTC)
I haven't seen the episode yet, but from your recap and the various reactions I've seen, I think what Sam is really trying to get Dean to understand, and what Dean is hearing him say are two very different things. I saw a comment elsewhere - I don't remember exactly where - that I thought summed it up nicely.

"Sam said, I wouldn't make that choice for you. Dean heard, Sam doesn't love me."

I know I haven't actually seen the epi yet, but I think I can surmise from past behavior that Sam was being brutally blunt because at his point he feels like this is the only way he can get his message through to Dean. I think Sam needs Dean to understand his POV almost as much as Dean needs to save him. Have you ever become so frustrated with trying to get through to someone that you just feel like beating some sense into them? I think maybe this is how Sam is feeling and why his words felt so brutal.
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:41 am (UTC)
Have you ever become so frustrated with trying to get through to someone that you just feel like beating some sense into them?

Oh, yes. Recently, in fact.

And I think you make a very good point here -- but the way Sam is saying his harsh truth that needs to be said is not getting the truth part out...it's getting the harsh part out.

He needs to figure out a different way because he's destroying his brother, which is not what he wants to do. :(
Lata Ahuja
Feb. 5th, 2014 06:38 pm (UTC)
Thanks again for such a great review, as usual.

Trying to see both brothers' sides of the argument is getting harder and harder. I am starting to get frustrated with Sam. He always claims to want Dean to respect his choices and treat him like an adult - yet it seems like whenever he actually makes a choice that turns out badly ( drinking demon blood, ending the trials), he turns around and blames that on Dean. I am not saying that Dean did not have an impact on those decisions, but they were ultimately Sam's choices. Yes - the choice that Dean made for Sam with Gadreel was a mistake, and Sam has a right to be mad about that - but I think Sam needs to accept this own role in the events leading to that point.

Dean, on the other hand, I feel takes responsibility for his choices (good or bad). I understand Sam's frustration with Dean's comment that he did the "right" thing, and that he would do it again. Sam is having some self-worth issues and is not dealing well with Dean always putting him above everyone else. I believe that's where some of his comments are coming from, especially the one about Dean doing more bad than good. Sam sees Dean saving Sam at the cost of others as bad, and to him Dean has done that too many times. The comment I can't forgive him for though, is that Dean is only willing to sacrifice when he is not the one getting hurt. I don't know where he came up with that - but, I guess he is hurt and struggling, and finds it is easiest to lash out at the person closest to him, one that he knows will forgive him in the end.

I also don't agree with Sam's comment about Dean only saving Sam because that was what Dean wanted. Dean is capable of letting Sam go - if he believes it is what Sam truly wants (letting him go to Stanford, letting him chase after John, letting him jump in the pit). Dean just did not believe that letting Sam die due to the trails was what Sam would have wanted - based on his comments at the beginning of the trials.

I hope the Sam that thanked Dean at the end of Bad Boys finds his way back. I just don't know if what he broke in Dean this episode can be fixed. I hope the show's writers figure a way to build Dean back up. I can't see his like this anymore!

Edited at 2014-02-05 10:03 pm (UTC)
gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:43 am (UTC)
I am not saying that Dean did not have an impact on those decisions, but they were ultimately Sam's choices.

Yep.

The comment I can't forgive him for though, is that Dean is only willing to sacrifice when he is not the one getting hurt.

Yeah, me too. That's where I got really hung up. All my listening gears screeched to a halt.

Dean is capable of letting Sam go - if he believes it is what Sam truly wants (letting him go to Stanford, letting him chase after John, letting him jump in the pit). Dean just did not believe that letting Sam die due to the trails was what Sam would have wanted - based on his comments at the beginning of the trials.

Yep. Which is why I felt like Sam had some kind of memory loss to be able to say all of that.

I hope the writers are taking us all some place we want to go! :(

See you again soon.
tyrsibs
Feb. 5th, 2014 06:54 pm (UTC)
OH, man, I really need to pay closer attention! I heard something completely different from Sam's line--I heard, "as long as you're not the one who gets left." But he did say "hurt." Ok, now I am upset at Sam, too--that's seriously selective memory. "Left" I understood, and sympathized with, since Sam after all HAS been left behind, in ways that Dean can't really comprehend. He can know about all those Tuesdays in "Mystery Spot," for example, but he can't really know what that was like for his brother. And Sam has never really explained what Dean's time in Purgatory was like for him, nor has Dean really tried to understand that point. But "hurt"? I get that Sam is angry, but that was perhaps the worst thing he could have said, not to mention untrue, as you pointed out. It leaves Dean with absolutely nothing to hang onto, and you could see how shattered he was as Sam left the room.

That said, I enjoyed this episode for the most part. The MOTW was original (though I was surprised to see another sympathetic monster story right after last week's), and there were some funny kicks sprinkled throughout--do you think Sam can hold Downward Facing Dog for 5 minutes? (I've only ever managed about 20 seconds, myself!)

I agree with your likes and loves, and would also add that detail of the lady in the gym taking off her engagement ring before weighing herself. Every little bit helps, right? I liked the actress playing the sheriff, too, her soft, blissed out look when she saw Sam in the corridor, as well as her "confession" scene--and "flying fudge"! Also liked the final showdown in the basement--love it when the brothers work in tandem as they were during that scene, and liked the shot of Sam in closeup looking back to check on Dean going around the corner at the end of the hall.

My take on Dean's wanting to kill the doctor at the end was that he was mainly testing Sam with another dig on the "just business" approach. If he was set on killing her, he wouldn't have started talking to her when he found her with the (very gross) evidence. I saw his comments as a way to indirectly say to Sam, "you don't really want to hunt like this, do you?" Of course, I don't think Sam heard it that way--and I could always be wrong!

To be honest (brutally or not), I'm just hoping that the confrontation at the end of this ep might eventually lead to positive things. Sometimes these kinds of discussions can clear the air, and I am at least glad that Sam stated exactly what was bothering him even if I think he is as wrong as he is right. I'm worried, though, that it will get worse before it gets better for Dean, since I fear that he will mostly hear once again that he's "poison."





gaelicspirit
Feb. 24th, 2014 03:45 am (UTC)
--do you think Sam can hold Downward Facing Dog for 5 minutes? (I've only ever managed about 20 seconds, myself!)

HA! I'd like to see him try. I'm with you: 20 secs and my arms are shaking.

detail of the lady in the gym taking off her engagement ring before weighing herself.

I totally missed that! LOL! *love* I'm right there with her.... :)

I'm worried, though, that it will get worse before it gets better for Dean, since I fear that he will mostly hear once again that he's "poison."

Yeah, me too. Which makes me uncomfortably anxious for the next few episodes.... *meep*
(Anonymous)
Feb. 5th, 2014 07:02 pm (UTC)
I have to say I agree with almost all the comments above on both sides of the fence. But right now I’m angry at what seems to be the characterization of Dean as a battered wife staying with an abusive spouse; because Sam’s behavior this time was pure emotional abuse, well beyond “being honest” and into deliberately hurtful, twisting the truth and going directly for known weak spots. (I know from experience that more damage can be done when cruel things are said in a reasonable voice, as in “I’m only telling you this for your own good, dear,” instead of anger; because you can fight back or deny angry words, while words that seem to be sympathetic and helpful hit your insecurities.)

And while I *think* what Sam meant to say was that he wouldn’t use extraordinary measures to save Dean, what came out was exactly what he’d said back in Asylum and Sex & Violence: “You’re pathetic” with a side of “I won’t bother saving you.” And that’s not what you want to hear from a partner.

What I *wanted* Dean to say was, “look, I don’t need a partner. I can always find someone to hunt with if I need to. I *want* a brother. So if you can’t do that, well, thanks but no thanks. Maybe we can get together for the holidays.” What I thought we *might* get (after the anvils about trying to protect a brother who was a monster, and the sympathetic monster girl saying she’d lost her whole family) was Sam realizing how much Dean had helped him over the years, by never giving up on him; by not letting him turn into a monster; by acknowledging that the two of them “keep each other human.” But then…GAHHH! And if this is yet *another* whammy (as was suggested, from the Mark of Cain) then I think it’s time the writers figure out something new. Especially if Sam is going to turn around yet again and say, “so sorry, didn’t mean it.”

So rather than go into all that again, I want to point out one thing that I haven’t seen mentioned in any of the discussions lately: Sam’s “if you’d only let me die when I wanted to then all this bad stuff wouldn’t have happened.”

Sorry, Sam, but you’re not that important. IT WOULDN’T HAVE MADE ANY DIFFERENCE.

If Sam had NOT agreed to give up the trials (which, as everyone has pointed out, was his choice), maybe the gates of hell would be closed (though they never explained the ramifications of that) and Crowley would (maybe) be out of the picture. BUT:

Abbadon would still be around and wreaking hell (literally) on earth. That was on Henry Winchester, not Sam or Dean.

Metatron would still have taken over heaven, because if you’re assigning blame, that was Cas’s fault, and nothing to do with Sam or his trials.

The angels would still have fallen (including Gadreel), and the angel wars begun.

Kevin would STILL be dead, because Metatron couldn’t let a prophet (who could undo his lockout) live. Whether it was Gadreel in someone else’s body or some other angel, it was a done deal as soon as Metatron took over. It might have taken longer to find Kevin, but it still would have happened.

The only thing that Sam’s death would have done was prevent HIM from feeling guilty. He could go happily into the light without caring that it would leave Dean in the middle of a battle, devastated and without ANY support at all (especially since Cas at that point was gone, too…) And if he’d died in 9.1 without closing the gates (when he was “ready to die”) it would ALL have been pointless, and not even a heroic death. Might I say selfish?

Like others, I’m angry that all the blame falls on Dean, and I’m afraid that the resolution will be Dean admitting he’s wrong about everything and trying to become exactly what Sam wants, and Sam never having to take any responsibility for his own actions. Growth has to be on BOTH sides, or it becomes (once again) Dean giving up what he truly believes just to make Sam happy.

So at this point I think Dean needs to get away from Sam to process and rediscover his own identity and then come back and say, “sorry, but this is who I am. We both have to work together to come to some compromise or you can go and find your own life. But since you’ve been accusing me of ignoring your needs, the least you can do is try to accept some of mine.”

Nancy

darkrose_9
Feb. 5th, 2014 09:43 pm (UTC)
Sorry, Sam, but you’re not that important. IT WOULDN’T HAVE MADE ANY DIFFERENCE.

If Sam had NOT agreed to give up the trials (which, as everyone has pointed out, was his choice), maybe the gates of hell would be closed (though they never explained the ramifications of that) and Crowley would (maybe) be out of the picture. BUT:

Abbadon would still be around and wreaking hell (literally) on earth. That was on Henry Winchester, not Sam or Dean.

Metatron would still have taken over heaven, because if you’re assigning blame, that was Cas’s fault, and nothing to do with Sam or his trials.

The angels would still have fallen (including Gadreel), and the angel wars begun.

Kevin would STILL be dead, because Metatron couldn’t let a prophet (who could undo his lockout) live. Whether it was Gadreel in someone else’s body or some other angel, it was a done deal as soon as Metatron took over. It might have taken longer to find Kevin, but it still would have happened.

The only thing that Sam’s death would have done was prevent HIM from feeling guilty.


MTE
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keywester
Feb. 5th, 2014 07:46 pm (UTC)
hey gaelic-it's meggin
Ramble 9.13 The purge

So proud that you carry on the fight to stay fit! I’ve been dealing with dietary issues for the past 30 years, unsuccessfully I might add, and am glad to hear success stories because it still gives me hope (((You)))

I’m fine with some monsters being good. I think it is more natural and infinitely more realistic (as realistic as you can get in the SPN world -wink!) to have characters that are shades of gray.

And apart from that who wouldn’t want an entity that could exist in a symbiotic relationship with humans by providing a much needed and “green” service of living off our extra pounds? Win Win I say! (LOL)

Shared loves: Wasn’t Sheriff Hanscum’s voice a hoot! So Minnesotan. So Fargo-esk! And who doesn’t love a powdered sugar coated Dean-Yum! Think of what kissing those lips would taste like!!!
Sam in a tank and that camera pan slowly through his downward dog-ahem.
Dean roofied with Pudding and passed out on the sweet potato bags.

Shared likes: Dean’s use of the word “cushion” oh mmmy. Reminds me of a line in the play “last of the Red hot Lovers” Where the middle aged hubby tells his wife that his middle aged butt is just fine because “you can’t drive a spike with a tack hammer” Woot!
Hairnet-what got me was the look on Dean’s face while he held those tongs in the promo ads- remember Bill Murray’s use of the Spatuala in Stripes? (fan’s self)

RE: cupping actually is a real thing and part of acupuncture/pressure. I’ve had it done and only got humongeous bruises as a result but the acupuncture itself did work.

Now Sam is telling Dean that Family is not the most important thing. The most important person in Dean's world just told him that the most important thing Dean believes in is...not important.

“The bottom line is, he's saying he wouldn't do the same thing Dean did because it's not what he would have wanted. So, in a weird way, while he wouldn't be saving Dean's life, he would actually be doing the same thing -- Sam would be doing for Dean what Sam wants and not what Dean wants, just as he accused Dean of doing for him what Dean wanted, not what Sam wanted.”

And that is what hurts Dean the most the fact that Sam told him to his face
that if roles were reversed Sam would have a DNR on him if he had been lying in that hospital bed instead of Sam.

Which is, as you said, exactly as wrong a thing to do to Dean, although it fits with what Sam would have wanted for himself, as Dean sacrificing himself and others to always save Sam feels wrong to Sam.

Oh boys. (pets them)
darkrose_9
Feb. 5th, 2014 09:45 pm (UTC)
Re: hey gaelic-it's meggin
The most important person in Dean's world just told him that the most important thing Dean believes in is...not important.

...Oh SHIT.

This could send Dean into a depressive spiral. And he's got the mark of Cain.

SHIT.
Re: hey gaelic-it's meggin - gaelicspirit - Feb. 24th, 2014 03:50 am (UTC) - Expand
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