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I am made of fail.

I fully intended to have this completed last night when I returned from book club, but we were discussing “I Was A Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids,” and if there is anything 8 women can discuss for hours upon end, it’s the ups and downs of motherhood.

Upon returning home, I barely made it to bed, let alone to the TV, so I sacrificed my work-out this morning to watch our boys. I think I chose wisely.

Because? This episode was a kick in the ass. Figuratively and literally. *HUGS SHOW*

I loved this episode. I love how it slipped against my life. I love how it shook Dean up and set Sam sideways and gave them back that synchronicity that they needed to see in each other. My hope from last episode—the hope that Sam cared so much for Dean that he was afraid of losing him, not convinced that Dean was worthless in this fight—was renewed.

As the Kinks roll out with A Well-Respected Man we are treated to a snazzy-dressed (we’re talking tie, collar/cuffs, suspenders, the works, baby) Dean steaming his morning cappuccino in his ultra-modern, very stainless steel, direct from the Ethan Allen catalogue apartment. He heads outside to his *gulp* Pruis and turns off rock ‘n roll in favor of *doublegulp* NPR. No offense to you NPR-lovers out there, but… *yawn*

Heading in to the high-rise office of Sandover Iron and Something (didn’t catch it), he does the nod/wink to fellow corporate forward-thinkers, slips into his office where his nameplate says Dean Smith, Director of Sales and Marketing and slips easily into the Jerry MacGuire BSing role of telling people what they want to hear. Eating salad (SALAD?!) at his desk with dead eyes staring at a computer, he continues his day with his boss stepping in to say “Good stuff” and “Big things” (WTF??), then writes down a recipe for weight loss because of his sad, sedentary lifestyle.

If I might slip into the gutter briefly, the man could wear a burlap sack and I think my pulse would quicken. Make no mistake—I love me some holey jeans, a gray T-shirt, flannel, leather, our Dean. But the corporate suit? The suspenders? The styled hair? Dude, I’d take it if those eyes were staring out and those lips were serious and pursed in my direction. He. Was. Yummy.

Okay, so, the only thing I knew about this episode was what we were shown in the previews from last week, and honestly? I was so shaken up by the events of that epi that I didn’t really let the ramifications of what this episode would include sink in. Now I’m watching my hero live the life so many of us have been doomed to—existing on survival mode because what the hell else is there, learning to like coffee because we need the legal hit of a stimulant and sometimes because we need to fit in. Finding the crack of promise in a two-word compliment from the person that holds your financial livelihood in their hands.

God. Just… God.

Quite literally MOMENTS before watching the epi this morning, I had said to my good friend Ash (and yes, I do have a good friend named Ash) that I wasn’t who I was supposed to be. I’m not kidding—you can ask her. We had been talking about being Mothers the night before and I said that I wasn’t the same person now that I was before I had Mo Chuisle and I didn’t know who I was now, but that I wasn’t sure I was who I was supposed to be. I wasn’t meant to simply be her mom. I had a different journey. She was a crucial part of that journey, but she wasn’t the end of it.

Many of the other ladies said that their destiny was to be a Mom. They are satisfied with this point, but some were fearful of what was going to happen when the kids no longer needed them as they do now. I don’t have that fear. I have different fears, like missing the point of it all, or being so concerned with what I’m not to see what I am, but all I could articulate at the time was that I was meant to be something else. Something more.

And then… I watched our boys. Dude, seriously? I felt all weird and shaky. I can’t tell you how much I loved this episode on so many different levels—the metaphor, the lessons, the correlation with real life. I’m gonna try to get that all out in this ramble if you hang with me.

JazzyIrish, who wrote this one? I didn’t pay attention. Again. Although, I did see that Kim Manners was exec producer. *sniff*

Okay, anyway, day ends and Dean Smith gets into the elevator with a nicely-buff looking Sam in a yellow shirt and khaki’s (which, oddly, worked nicely to frame that sweet ass of his). Sam is looking at Dean strangely and eventually is compelled to ask, “Do I know you?” After some uncomfortable shrug-offs, Dean shuts him down with a “Save it for the health club, pal.”

HA! *Gaelic guffaws*

We head to the yellow-shirt cube farm where Sam Wesson is working tech support, headgear framing his ear while he taps the bobble head of a cartoonish vampire and drones, “Did you turn it off then turn it back on?”

First of all? Smith and Wesson? Oh. My. God. *LAUGHING SO HARD* The writers had an awesome time with this episode. I have never wanted so badly to have been in that room while an episode was being born.

Second? I now feel extremely guilty for all the many times I’ve had to call tech support and/or the IT guy to help me fix something that turned out to be so flippin’ simple he must have just wanted to kill me. I learned a lot from him, though. Enough that I can now run my business from my own house. I only have to call Geek Squad like, oh, once a quarter. *ahem*

ANYWAY, Sam has a rapport with Ian, the flannel-shirt-wearing, devil-may-care tech guy who likes to “shop” in the office supply closet. Sam has shared with Ian his dreams about fighting ghosts and vampires, the most recent being that he saved a grim reaper named Tessa. Ian chortles saying “thank God we have Harry Potter to save us from the apocalypse!”

“Dick!”

“Wizard!”

*snicker*

Bored out of his skull, Sam falls asleep at his desk and dreams quick flashes of Season 1 and Season 2. Jerking awake, another day has ended and he heads to the elevator where he’s eventually left alone once more with Dean Smith, who is looking highly uncomfortable under Sam’s scrutiny.

“Can I ask you a question?” leads to “What do you think about ghosts… vampires.” Dean says he’s not given them much thought and Sam confesses that he’s been having these dreams… Dean does a public service and says to Sam, “You overshare.” *smirk*

Sam returns to his “turn it off/turn it on” excitement and Ian says he got an email to report to HR, hoping they “spank him.” Oooookay then. Paul, an older techie who was previously shown to be REALLY into his work, starts to have a massive freak out about losing a days worth of work and when left behind for the day completely loses his shit, heads to the break room, and stuffs his head in a microwave.

I KNOW! I was skeeved out beyond measure. I mean… guuuhhhhhh.

So, next day, Paul’s body is being wheeled out and both Dean and Sam are watching, both obviously feeling something isn’t right about this. They individually figure out that poor Paul was two weeks away from retirement before he zapped himself. Sam brings this up to Ian, who is now wearing the Yellow Shirt and is as focused on work as Dead Paul had been prior to the whole microwave incident. Sam’s all, wtf, dude, and Ian gets a call to go up and see a manager.

Said manager just so happens to be Dean Smith, who simply wants him to fill out a TPS report. Or something. Anyway, Ian flips out, runs out of Dean’s office with Dean hot on his heels, heads to the bathroom to stare at himself in the mirror with complete self-loathing. Cool air, water and soap coming on and Dean’s creeped out. He demands that Ian Look At Him (and that voice, mrroww).

Ian turns, grabs one of the pencils he’d stolen, then jabs it into his jugular. GORE! Just before calling for help, Dean sees the reflection of an old man in the bathroom stall door. As the police are questioning him, Dean sees Sam standing in the crowd of onlookers looking on and something crosses his face.

So, at this point I’m watching going… okay, what’s the deal? Trickster? Demon? Are they under the same ghostly spell and aren’t themselves??

Dean calls Sam to his office (where he’s changing his shirt like a good little corporate executive) and they start in on the whole what’s the deal conversation. Both started 3 weeks ago, both have an “instinct” that something is going on here that’s all ghosty and stuff. Sam reveals that both Paul and Ian were sent a memo to report to HR in room 1444. Dean reveals that HR is on the 7th floor. Duh, duh duhhhhh.

“You want to check this out?”

“Right now?”

“You’re right… it’s getting late.”

“Dude, I am dying to check this out right now.”

“Right?!”

Dean’s word for the episode was “Right?!” Loved it.

So now I’m thinking, okay, so this is a lesson for Dean, to teach him what he’s meant to do, right? But if that’s right, then why is Sam dreaming? And why have ghosts in what is essentially an AU? *shut up and watch, Gaelic*

Okay, so they head to 1444, hear some hollering inside from another wayward Techie that has been attacked by the ghostie. Sam kicks the locked door open and Dean’s like “Whoa!” They struggle, fight, and Dean grabs a wrench and swings it at the old man ghostie (that reminded me a lot of the doc from Asylum) and the ghost vanishes.

“How did you know how to do that?”

“I have no idea!”

*Gaelic claps ‘cause she is loving them working together*

I mean, was it me, or were you all feeling a distinct Season 1 vibe through most of this epi?

Okay, so back at Dean’s stainless steel pad, they’re regrouping. Sam wants a beer, but Dean’s “on the cleanse” and got rid of the carbs, so he hands Sam a bottle of water. The conversation segues into “we’ve done this before” territory – but not like Shirley McClain before. Sam’s speech in that moment totally hit home for me.

“Don’t like my job, don’t like my clothes, don’t like my own last name (AWWW!)… think we should be doing something else… something in my blood (ha!)… like we’re destined to be doing something else.”

Dean, however, doesn’t believe in destiny he says. He believes in dealing with what is right in front of him.

How incredibly true to form are both those statements? From the beginning, Dean has been black and white, Sam has been gray. Sam has been the visionary, the “what if” guy. Dean didn’t believe it until he could see, smell, touch, taste. I loved that. I love that they were so very THEM in that moment.

“What do we do now?”

“We do what I do best, Sammy (AWWW! He said Sammy! *sniffs*). Research. “

*Gaelic guffaws at the role switch there.*

We even got a Season 1 throwback of “don’t call me Sammy”… although, seriously? I love love love how easily it rolled off of Dean’s tongue. *pauses for a moment to think about Dean’s tongue*

Annnndddd… high-larity ensues when Dean cries Jackpot and says “I just found the best site ever.” OMG… I needed that laugh. I really did. It came from the belly.

So, we get a little Ghostfacers montage with instructions about what to do (figure out what you’re up against) and how to get rid of it (salt, iron, all that). They bring up the Winchesters – which gets a bit fat nothing from the boys as they watch the “instructional video” – and say that no matter what they learned from the “douchenozzles” that they still sucked.

So, Mr. Smith and Mr. Wesson learn that their ghost is none other than PT Sandover, the founder of the company. They realize that he wasn’t afraid of the wrench, but that it was the iron in the wrench. They figure that the ghost appears during times of great economic stress (17 suicides in 1929 – yipe!), and that they have to dig up the remains (which, as the ‘facers point out, is illegal in some states. Make that all states.) They find out the Sandover was cremated—but are told by the ‘facers to NOT PANIC. There is some genetic material (who says milk teeth anymore??) left behind.

So, they arm up with salt and andirons, unsure where to or how to get guns on short notice, and head to the skyscraper to look for ancient DNA. They synchronize their Swatches—er, I mean cell phones—in case they get lost, and head to room 1444 (which, they found out, used to be Sandovers office once upon a time).

Still with me? Good. Okay, so Sam gets caught sneaking around by a well-intentioned security guard and Dean is left to keep looking. Sam and Guard are in the elevator when it starts to wig out and I got EXTREMELY NERVOUS. We’re talking, roll into a ball and chant omgomgomgomgomg nervous. So, while Dean is finding a picture of some bridge that gives him a clue as to where the ancient DNA is, Guard pries the elevator doors open and shimmies out while Sam’s like, uh-uh, no thanks, I’ll wait.

You totally knew what was going to happen, but still, hearing the Guard say something about waiting the rest of his life just before the elevator literally cuts him in half, splattering his blood all over a shocked and shaken Sam while his legs (ACK!) are still kicking in reaction… GORE!!! Sam answers Dean’s “are you okay” page with a trembling “call you back.”

Dean tells him to meet on the 22nd floor while Sam implores him to “take the stairs.” They find PT Sandovers gloves and…. FIGHT! And, dudes, it was awesome. None of the angst or the stomach clenching of this season. Just straight up swinging iron bars and flinging salt and getting tossed and Sam yelling “DEAN!” and figuring it out in the nick of time and burning the gloves and a “that was awesome” and a “right?! Right?!”

*CHEERS!* Loved it loved it loved it.

Later, Dean claims that was the most fun he’s had in his life while he’s getting bandages out for both of them. Sam says that they should just do this – think of all the people they could save. Dean scoffs asking what, are they going to live on stolen credit cards, greasy diner food, bad motels… Sam’s like, those are just details. Dean argues that the details are everything. They can’t fight ghosts without health insurance. *frowns*

Sam tells him that in the ghostie dreams he had, Dean was there. They were friends—more like brothers. He doesn’t think they’re living the right life. Dean’s like, dude, I went to Stanford, father is Bob, mother is Ellen, sister is Jo. *HA!!* Sam’s like, yeah, he moved here because he broke up with his fiancé Madison, but he called her number and all he got was an animal hospital. *DOUBLE HA!* I’m telling you, the writers had a BLAST with this. I certainly did!

Dean’s like, you’re saying my family isn’t real? Sam’s like, I have a feeling in my gut that we’re supposed to be something else. I know you.

And I swear to you, it was like gears literally fell into place for me. I didn’t quite get it until the very end—the whole WHY that I’d been looking for throughout the entire episode. But it was that statement from Sam that made it clear. I’ll get to it in a minute, but I know you all are already there. You were there last night, man.

Dean says that Sam doesn’t know him and tells him to leave. Sam complies. Next day, Sam is back in tech support staring at the phone while it rings and rings and rings and bloodyhellmaketheflippinthingstop rings. Took me back to my Admin Assistant days when I just wanted to beat the phone to death. And then? Sam does. I’m not kidding. Stands up and beats it to death with a crowbar. “I quit.”

*CLAPS AND WHISTLES!!!!*

Dean is in his office typing typing typing. Mr. Boss Man comes in and I narrow my eyes at him. I didn’t trust him completely. I don’t know if it was because in this universe he was The Man, or because he gave off a vibe, but… yeah. He sits down and tells Dean he’s willing to reward him for his hard work with a generous bonus because he “wants to make sure you’re not going anywhere.”

Ah-HA! Demon! Right?! Wrong.

Dean gives notice, thanking Mr. Boss Man for his generosity and says he very recently realized that he has some work he has to do that’s very important. “This is not who I’m supposed to be.”

“Dean, Dean, Dean…” And, our hero is touched by an angel, returning to himself in a rush, horrified by the fact that he’s wearing a tie and STARVING. *laugh*

Turns out Mr. Boss Man is Zachariah, Castiel’s superior. After the unfortunate incident with Uriel, he decided that he needed to pay them a visit. Dean gets flippant and Zach says, “starting with your attitude.” Dean’s all…wth is up with the hallucination or whatever and Zach says “you should see my decoupage.”

“Gross. No thank you.”

*BWAH!!!*

Turns out this is a real place, a real haunting, but Zach took the boys and dropped them in there without their memories. Basically for this:

“To prove to you that the path you’re on is in your blood—you’re a hunter. Not because your dad called you, not because God called you back, but because it’s what you are. You love it. You find your way to it in the dark because you’re miserable without it. You will stop it.”

Dean’s listening, his face set, his eyes deep, his lips twitching. At this he bellows with the jaw muscle rippling along his cheek, “Stop what? The apocalypse? Lucifer? Be specific, man!”

“You will do everything you’re destined to do. All of it. I know, I know, you’re not strong enough, you’re scared, you’ve got Daddy issues…”

Dean: “Angel, or not, I will stab you in your face.” ATTA BOY!!!

“You get a chance to change things,” Zach continues. “Save people. It’s not a curse, it’s a gift. So quit whining about it. There are plenty of fates worse than yours.”

The screen goes black with that call to action and Dean lifts his face, his eyes meeting the angels and something shifts there. A light. A purpose.

This was the kick in the ass that he’s needed. I have friends that do that for me – virtually and in “real life.” I have the ones who will pet me and offer me condolences. I have the ones that I can go to for all my justification needs. And I have the ones that will smack me around like Cher and yell, “Snap out of it!”

This was Dean’s smack. This whole illusion was placed put on so that he can see that this wasn’t thrust upon him. This wasn’t his burden to bear. This was him. And not just Dean, but Sam, too. Sam had to be in this AU for two reasons, as I saw it:

One: He is crucial to Dean’s being whole. Without Sam there, there isn’t a reason for Dean to be who he is. He needed that interaction with Sam to come back to himself. He could have done that whole thing on his own—the research, the fight, all of it. But it was the chemistry with Sam that trigger the want to do it in him.

Two: Sam had the memories, the dreams, the gut-instinct of destiny. But it was more than that—he needed to remember that it was about a journey of two. In all of his dreams, Dean was there. They were “like brothers” in those memories. And no amount of power or destiny or what have you erased that. He needed Dean to walk that path with him. He didn’t want to do it alone. And that’s important—it’s vital that they both remember that.

Zach’s vicious shake wasn’t without understanding, though. It wasn’t as if all that Dean was feeling or suffering from/with wasn’t valid and/or justified. His life has been hard. And Daddy issues suck out loud. And yeah, he’s scared and scarred and beaten and tired. But… all that aside? He’s strong enough. He’s good enough. And he can do this. He just had to be reminded. No amount of soft-eyed gazes and cryptic messages from Castiel or pleas to “get angry” from Sam was going to fix this. The only other thing that might have worked would have been John saying, “I need you to do this.”

But even that would have been a cop-out. Because Dean needed to come back to himself because HE deserves it, because he is worthy. Not because Dad asked him to.

Like I said at the beginning, I loved this episode. I love how it slipped against my life. I love how it shook Dean up and set Sam sideways and gave them back that synchronicity that they needed to see in each other. My hope from last episode—the hope that Sam cared so much for Dean that he was afraid of losing him, not convinced that Dean was worthless in this fight—was renewed.

Tune in next week when you’ll hear Gaelic say…


Comments

( 50 Tall Tales — Tell Me A Story )
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kajmere
Mar. 27th, 2009 06:23 pm (UTC)
you're reviews make me smile :)

The only other thing that might have worked would have been John saying, “I need you to do this.”

But even that would have been a cop-out. Because Dean needed to come back to himself because HE deserves it, because he is worthy. Not because Dad asked him to.



& thats what this whole ep boiled down to. Deans self worth. I hope he sees himself in a better light.
I know it will probably take more the a simple AU experience for him to realize it. but i hope it sets him on the road to recovery.

thank you for this :)
gaelicspirit
Mar. 28th, 2009 03:36 am (UTC)
Thank you for reading and taking time to comment. I love seeing everyone's thoughts on the episodes. Especially because as a general rule, they are usually much more thought-out than mine. :)

i hope it sets him on the road to recovery.

See, I think that's it right there. Nothing is SOLVED... but the journey back to himself has begun.
(Anonymous)
Mar. 27th, 2009 06:40 pm (UTC)
I loved it Gaelic! I missed the first 5 minutes so I was slightly confused at first, but I caught up quick. Seeing Dean all corporate- all I kept thinking was ZZ Tops "sharp dressed man"- yum. And Sam as tech support? outstanding. What really got me LOL ing though was the awesome website. I just knew it was going to be "the ghostfacers". I wasn't dissapointed. I laughed at the way they kept dissing the Winchesters thru the whole "class" and our boys never reacted. I know they didn't know they were "the douches" but still, fricking funny. I was wondering who or what was responsable for the whole altered reality by the time they were going to room 144 whatever- I was thinking trickster as well- wrongo!
The hubs and I have different opinions on who Zachariah is. The Hubs thinks he's really one of Uriel's supporters. I don't think so. I agree with you. Dean needed a kick in the ass to straighten out his head. And he needed a stron persona to give it to him cause let's be honest; Dean is a strong personality and all of Castiels gentle uncertainty or even Sam's beseeching him to get angry is going to get through to him.

"Because Dean needed to come back to himself because HE deserves it, because he is worthy." Bingo. Well said Gaelic.

"Tune in next week when you’ll hear Gaelic say… "
until then my dear,
Kate
gaelicspirit
Mar. 28th, 2009 03:39 am (UTC)
The hubs and I have different opinions on who Zachariah is.

I love that your hubs gets involved not only in the show but in the speculating. :) I don't think he's right in this case. I think that Zach is there to help Dean get back on his feet -- he just has an interesting way of going about it.

It kinda reminded me of the movie "Hook" when grown up Peter Pan returns to Neverland to find his kids, and the Lost Boys don't believe it's really Peter Pan, until one little boy goes up to him, smushes his face around a little and proclaims, "THERE you are, Peter!"

There you are, Dean. Remember this guy? It's not gonna go away. You don't just GET OVER it. But if you want to try, take my hand and head this way...
marta_kent
Mar. 27th, 2009 09:20 pm (UTC)
Thank you! Love your reviews. ♥
gaelicspirit
Mar. 28th, 2009 03:39 am (UTC)
Hey Marta! Thank you for reading. I hope your site still enjoys them. :)
(no subject) - marta_kent - Mar. 28th, 2009 08:36 am (UTC) - Expand
jazzyirish
Mar. 27th, 2009 10:08 pm (UTC)
Hey Gaelic, great review. This episode was written by Sera Gamble. I think that she and Ben Edlund decided to do a "switch styles" experiment. :) I thought she did a fairly good job with the humor and plot. Smith & Wesson - that was genius - just switching from the rifle to the handgun. *guffaws*

I figured from the start that an angel was responsible for the new reality for the boys. The title of the episode is a parody of "It's a Wonderful Life" in which an angel is in charge of "showing" the way. I don't know whether you noticed, but when Zachariah touched Dean on the forehead, the bright setting dimmed to our more usual colorization in the series. Very clever - just like the brightness in WIAWSNB.

In the shallow end of the pool, I thought Dean looked HOT, HOT, HOT. Loved the taste of the person in charge of wardrobe. And I cracked up when he threw his tie over his shoulder when he was eating his salad of all things. On the other hand, I thought Sam looked like a dork and that takes some work since he is such a good looking guy. Canary yellow - so not his thing.

I really liked the interaction between the boys as they "discovered" this new life, the way they trusted each other almost on instinct, and they had each other's backs. Oh to go back to those days again...

I agree that it would have been a blast to be a fly on the wall in that writing room. Sera did a good job. I could even stomach the Ghostfacers - which is saying a lot - since that is my all-time least favorite episode. But that could be because a few minutes of them is a whole lot better than a full episode of them.

I thought that Zach's message to Dean was right on. Right?! *ha* He basically told Dean that his life had meaning, had purpose, and a damn good one at that. Dean has everything in him that he needs to succeed, to fulfill his fate - all he has to do is pull himself up by the bootstraps, and like you say, "snap out of it". I'll be very curious to see how Dean is acting in the next episode, if we see a significant change in him.

Fabulous review as always. You really make the episodes twice as enjoyable and I love your insights.

Catch ya' later,
Irish
gaelicspirit
Mar. 28th, 2009 03:42 am (UTC)
I don't know whether you noticed, but when Zachariah touched Dean on the forehead, the bright setting dimmed to our more usual colorization in the series.

Come to think of it, I did notice that. It just didn't hit me the first time around.

He basically told Dean that his life had meaning, had purpose, and a damn good one at that.

Yep. And while it seems that some aren't pleased with HOW the message was delivered, the point was, Dean started to hear it. Loud and clear. For the first time. And while he's still trying to swallow not only the fact that he started this, but also that he has to finish it, he might now be able to take a deep breath instead of barely keeping his head above water.

Thanks so much for reading and offering me your thoughts. I knew I could count on you.

Oh, PS.
I just saw a flash in the previews for next week, but was the author on those books Carver Edlund? As in two last names of SPN writers?? How clever!
(Anonymous)
Mar. 27th, 2009 10:50 pm (UTC)
I just love reliving episodes through your words, Gaelic.

I totally loved last night's episode. It was great to see the boys working together again even though they didn't "know" each other. Instinctively they did and it was wonderful.

Jensen looked fantastic in all those suits AND managed to make suspenders sexy (IMHO). hehe And Jared--holy cow--he is so freakin' fantastically gorgeous. (Crazy but I loved him in khakis!) I imagine because of the brighter lighting, both boys' eyes were beyond belief--glowingly beautiful. There were lots and lots of close up shots last night that just made my heart flutter. (Including a good number of butt shots and full frontage shots. ROFL)

I was way late on catching that their last names were Smith & Wesson. I paid more attention to Sam's last name being Wesson than I did Dean's being Smith. The friend who was over to watch with me last night (Heidie--a co-worker and friend who went to ChicagoCon with me last November) caught on a split second before I did.

I loved Dean and the whole cleansing drink thing--very funny.

And Sam with his IT guy helpfulness--"Did you try turning it off. Turn it off. Now turn it back on. Did that help--is it printing?" Oh so patient and sweet. But then at the end, the total destruction of the phone. I was laughing my butt off.

The deaths of the three employees and the ghost who was killing them were all appropriately creepy. (Especially the scene when the ghost kept popping up behind each of them so fast.) Harkening back to the old days of Season 1, which was really, really nice to see.

And I, for one, liked Zachariah. I know many didn't. I thought was did a good job giving Dean a pep talk. Possibly a little pushy maybe--but I thought he was just determined to get Dean to see he was meant to be a hunter. I do wish that we would have had a tad bit of Dean and Sam at the very end--like say Dean rushing out of his office after the talk with Zachariah to find his brother and then running into Sam just as they reach the front door of the office building and Sam saying something like "Dean, what the hell--what--were we just..." And Dean just saying, "Yeah." as the screen fades to black. They could have cut a minute out of each of the death scenes to give us three minutes of S&D closure at the end.

But other than that minor complaint, last night's episode rocked.
(Anonymous)
Mar. 27th, 2009 10:51 pm (UTC)
Sorry--that was my comment above.

Vanessa
(no subject) - gaelicspirit - Mar. 28th, 2009 03:46 am (UTC) - Expand
sojourner84
Mar. 27th, 2009 11:06 pm (UTC)
:)
This episode was soooooo needed. I'm glad it's starting to take a turn, and I'm interested to see how Dean takes the message to heart. I think it's gonna take a lot more than just this AU to prove it to himself. I'm just be glad that the brokenness at the end of 'On the Head of a Pin' is starting to mend.

Things I laughed at (which--laughter during an episode. I missed that) or found cool:

1) Dean listening to NPR, so totally reminded me of the hubs. *laugh*
2) Dean on the Masters Diet/Cleanse--No idea if this was a nod to the Office and their weight-loss episode, but all Dean had to say was lemon juice and I was shouting at my TV "Don't do it! Not the Masters diet!!" His "why am I so hungry" comment at the end...*shakes head*
3) Smith and Wesson...*snicker* Nice.
4) Poor Sam...tech support...knowing a few people that do that. My sympathies, Sammy. Taking a fire poker to the telephone...I wanted to do that today at work. *laugh* Kinda wanna do the whole Office Space thing sometime...take our fax machine out to a field with a bat...*cough*
5) Kripke and co must have seen Last House on the Left (microwave death), The Happening (pencil death), and Resident Evil (elevator death)...or well I did, and had flashbacks during those scenes. *shivers*
6) The Ghostfacer's video blog. Dear. God. I muttered "I love this show" in between fits of laughter.
7) "Angel, or not, I will stab you in your face." *sighs* Now there's Dean.

Your review as always was a joy. This:

"I wasn’t who I was supposed to be."

God, know that feeling all too well...

"I mean, was it me, or were you all feeling a distinct Season 1 vibe through most of this epi?"

I think that's why I was grinning through the whole thing instead of grabbing the tissues.

"I’m telling you, the writers had a BLAST with this. I certainly did!"

Agreed!

"Zach’s vicious shake wasn’t without understanding, though. It wasn’t as if all that Dean was feeling or suffering from/with wasn’t valid and/or justified. His life has been hard. And Daddy issues suck out loud. And yeah, he’s scared and scarred and beaten and tired. But… all that aside? He’s strong enough. He’s good enough. And he can do this. He just had to be reminded. No amount of soft-eyed gazes and cryptic messages from Castiel or pleas to “get angry” from Sam was going to fix this. The only other thing that might have worked would have been John saying, “I need you to do this.”

But even that would have been a cop-out. Because Dean needed to come back to himself because HE deserves it, because he is worthy. Not because Dad asked him to."

Very well said.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

-SJ
gaelicspirit
Mar. 28th, 2009 03:57 am (UTC)
Re: :)
Wheee!! What awesome feedback and thoughts!! *does dance* Thank you thank you for coming by and sharing. :)

I'm just be glad that the brokenness at the end of 'On the Head of a Pin' is starting to mend.

Absolutely. I mean, it's not like Dean's all "you're right, I'm better, thanks for that..." but he had some light in his eyes that had been completely gone prior to last night. It was like... a dimmer switch had started to crank up. And there is a long road ahead for him, and I'm sure there will be so much more pain involved (they are Winchesters after all), but I actually have hope that he might walk through the fire.

Thanks again, girl. Love love love to hear from you!!
Re: :) - (Anonymous) - Mar. 28th, 2009 12:26 pm (UTC) - Expand
qultng1
Mar. 28th, 2009 01:33 am (UTC)
I loved this episode just like you did and for mostly the same reasons. :) My destiny is a little less ahead of me now, but I always wondered what it was.

I caught the Smith & Wesson almost immediately. An ol friend had some kittens named Smith & Wesson. LOL There was a lot of fun here, like you said and it was wonderful to see Dean into the hunt and energetic and seeming so normal again. *I love that little thing he does with his tongue! sigh*

I, too, thought there was something about the boss and was thrilled to find out who/what he was. Woohoo! Dean needed this, Sam needed this, and I needed this. I'm thrilled and no longer too worried about the rest of the season. :D Yippee!

I'm thankful that there will only be two epis that I'll miss while gone, but Tara's gonna watch them with me. That will be stupendous!

Anyway, I adored your review and we seem to adore the same things. *wiggles eyebrows*
gaelicspirit
Mar. 28th, 2009 03:59 am (UTC)
Hi Nana!!

Okay, I will keep emailing the link to you when you're down under so you can laugh at me and my frenetic lunacy with Tara. Who, speaking of, hasn't posted HER thoughts yet... where is that girl??

I am so happy to see your comments and love that you enjoyed it as much as I.

Anyway, I adored your review and we seem to adore the same things.

And that's why I love ya, lady. :)

Slatine!
parisindy
Mar. 28th, 2009 01:43 am (UTC)
love your review :)

hmmm really not quite sure what my reaction is.

this one didn't really sit right with me

last weeks was so so awesome then....this weeks left me just not knowing what to think

I liked the message..but i still think dean shouldn't be able to just get over it.

it felt a bit like a cop out

i liked the message about being meant for something more and following that,...loved how it felt like season 1....just, i mean... he cant just get over it... he has been through some heavy stuff.. you can't just say 'oh i will think more positive and it will all be fine'

i liked the ghost hunters whining about the Winchesters, and giant sam in the teeny tiny cubicle, and dean constantly saying 'i know right!'
i liked it...i just didn't love it...it just felt anti climactic after last week

its just weird, i expected something bigger
i need to let it sink in a bit

i just feel a bit deflated

love that you loved it though...i'm kind on the fence with this one
i'm not sure what i feel

iontas
Mar. 28th, 2009 03:17 am (UTC)
I am struggling with this one too. I liked most of it, but the interaction between Dean and Zach at the end bugged me. I was fine with what he was saying until he got to the daddy issues and the whining comment. Then it just felt disrespectful of everything Dean has endured. If the conversation had been more like, "hey you are Dean Winchester, of course you can do this!" I would have been happier.
(no subject) - gaelicspirit - Mar. 28th, 2009 03:55 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - iontas - Mar. 28th, 2009 06:13 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - parisindy - Mar. 28th, 2009 08:56 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - gaelicspirit - Mar. 28th, 2009 03:52 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - parisindy - Mar. 28th, 2009 09:04 am (UTC) - Expand
novembersguest
Mar. 28th, 2009 04:21 am (UTC)
I have different fears, like missing the point of it all, or being so concerned with what I’m not to see what I am, but all I could articulate at the time was that I was meant to be something else. Something more.

Yeah, I totally get that. I wonder all the time, what is my real purpose here on Earth. What is it that I should be doing?

Sometimes, I think I think too much :).

Anyway, I have to say, I thought Jensen was super-hot dressed like that--and his hair was cute and he was clean shaven! I swear, its impossible for him to look bad! He looked like a model for GQ or something.

I found this episode to be a very interesting contrast to WIAWSNB. It would seem that in WIAWSNB, Dean felt that if he had not had hunting in his life, he'd be a loser--irresponsible, selfish and practically a drunk...but it was neat that when his memories of his life were gone, when hunting was removed from the equation of his life, he was still successful, honorable, responsible even! You could see that all the traits that make Dean a great hunter are DEAN'S traits and not something hunting forced him to be, which is how I felt all along.

This ep only confirmed for me that WIAWSNB was Dean's version of who he would be without hunting and NOT how he actually would be. I think if Mary had never died and all the rest, he'd still have found some way to help people and be an all around good guy.

I also noticed the parallels of this ep to "Faith." It would seem that regardless of what the circumstance or playing field, Sam is always the one with the open mind, willing to believe there's MORE out there, while Dean is the skeptic. It was neat to see their roles stay true after this much time had passed between eps.

Also, another something I noticed--even when Sam had "normal," it wasn't enough for him. Granted, his job was pretty boring, but it was more than that. He MISSED the hunt. He had a genuine desire to do it. Huh.

Another interesting thing...of the two of them, Dean was the one who had a hard time letting go of normal. He was the one who seemed more reluctant to give up the "apple pie" life--which really doesn't surprise me...but it was interesting to note that the writers played it this way. Especially given that Dean didn't have bad memories to send him running into the "safer" life. And yet again, he was willing to give it all up to do the right thing despite the cost to him.

Thatta boy, Dean!!!
gaelicspirit
Apr. 1st, 2009 09:37 pm (UTC)
Goodness, it's taken me half of forever to get back to these comments and reply. I am SO SORRY that I left you hanging!

Okay, so love that you noticed the parallels to Faith -- I didn't pick up on that until I read your comment, but as soon as I did I was like, "oh, yeah!"

And yet again, he was willing to give it all up to do the right thing despite the cost to him.

This is totally our boy, right? Right?! ;) I mean, seriously, I think that's what draws us close time and again.

Yay for new epi tomorrow!!!
(no subject) - novembersguest - Apr. 2nd, 2009 04:59 am (UTC) - Expand
lovinjackson
Mar. 28th, 2009 10:18 am (UTC)
Since I had managed to watch the episode before I read this for a change I waited until just now to read it at all, wanting to get my thoughts out first before I lost it lol and I just realised i put my mood as "hopeful" too hehe I enjoyed this episode, I enjoyed writing about it and it was just so good to be able to watch and review it with a happy heart :) I love this show, I love it every week but man it tires my emotions so this was just sooooo good.

I cant say much more to this review but WORD!!! :) Talk soon hopefully

"Hugs*

gaelicspirit
Apr. 1st, 2009 09:37 pm (UTC)
Hey there -- we've already discussed this to pieces, especially since you wrote that fantastic tag. But I had to say thanks for coming by and commenting. I love that I can always count on you for that!! :)
roweenac
Mar. 29th, 2009 10:56 am (UTC)
Hey hunny, first of all I am glad I took the time to read this SoC...
for two reasons:
1: I missed yer take on the show and especially YOU!
2: I totally agree with you! Loved the epi and not only as a great episode of my fav show but because it spoke to me on a very personal level too!

Then: *smacks gaelic across head* You're NOT made of failure! Or at least you're not alone in it. Heh. Life can be a b***h, RIGHT? (LOL)

OK. As usual, you did a great job in this review/recap. You do them so much better than me. I am lacking the words to express what I mean mostly and I end up reiteratin' and ramblin'. I will tell those who read mine to head over to your journal and see the real stuff... *envies gaelic*

The first thing I have to say about this episode is how much it spoke to me (see? reiterating already!). How much Zachariah's words meant to me. I needed the pep-talk as well as Dean. I mostly feel like a silly, messed up failure lately and the words just encouraged me to find the strength to face my issues. I love that about the show. I can relate to many of the boys' issues. Aside from the supernatural elements this show is about normal guys with normal issues...

And about Zachariah... I knew he was an angel from the get go. His name Adler is German and translates to eagle. So all I could see were feathers... By the way, wasn't he a little too emotional and humorous (making Dean eat salads and wear a tie, HILARIOUS) to be a normal angel?

I dunno if anyone already said it, but Sera Gamble wrote this one. She did a fine job. Liked it. Normally, all she does is make Sam cry and get naked (not that I'd complain)... But this time the whole epi revolved around Dean or both brothers. Nice job!

And the season 1 (and 2) vibes totally rocked. The ghost reminded me of Sanford Ellicott, too, as did the action scenes. The lines they spoke were so like the early seasons. Maybe they had to say them again to somehow walk/talk the path again that made them the hunters they are today.

Being a sucker for gore, I LOVED THE KILLINGS. Awesome, twisted and bloodthirsty. Nice contrast to the bright and colourful scenes too.

The boys were so much themselves even in this AU! More than lately with all the role reversal and demon-blood issues, the apocalypse... It felt like a nice break from all that, time to regroup for the final episodes... (geez. I am not sure I will survive the summer. The last episodes were awesome and I fear that the finale will rock even more and change the show forever... *bites bottom lip until blood surfaces*)

Did you notice how the colour changed when Zachariah touched Dean? That was some great photography...

I agree that Dean needed a "spanking" (hehe, love Ian). A wake up call. And Sam head to be there for exactly the reasons you mentioned. And for himself. He needed to be reminded of the basics of the life as a hunter, too. Hope, Sam learned a few things himself. But I don't think so. I fear he is going to go even darker...

That's it for today. Back to work... keep avoiding it... damn the "normality". I want to be a hero too!

Hugs ya, Ilka
gaelicspirit
Apr. 2nd, 2009 02:02 am (UTC)
Okay, I'm scrambling to reply to these fantastic comments before tomorrow gets insane and then there's a new episode. I just wanted to say THANK YOU for coming by and commenting. I love reading your thought process here. I haven't been to your page to read your speculations yet, though. I think I might chicken out 'cause I want to just be surprised, y'know? Or see how Kripke has it planned.

And then go read yours and see how close it was. :)

You're right, it was definitely a nice break, but I just *know* the angst is still to come. It's too heavy and too much has happened for a simple "snap out of it" to fix EVERYTHING.

Still, it was good to take a breath. :)
thruterryseyes
Mar. 29th, 2009 02:04 pm (UTC)
I did read this but i didn't have time to do a nice comment like I wanted and then I forgot as usual. So instead of the long comment I was gonna leave, which require me to read this again to find all the stuff i wantred to coment on and would again leave me without time to comment since I have to go to work I'll just say, both show and review were wonderful. You alwayus pick up on stuff I miss and since I did miss the first couple minutes I never got the Smith and Wesson joke so ta for pointing that out to me. I think I missed alot of stuff becauser every time Dean came on screen looking like THAT my mouth fell open and my brain passed out. I did however LOVE the part especially where the guys head got chopped off and his feet were kicking. PROOF that you dpon't have to show the severed head to get the required affect.

And smashing the phone with the poker....loved smashing the phone with the poker...
gaelicspirit
Apr. 2nd, 2009 02:03 am (UTC)
I want to smash a phone with a poker. *sigh*

I love love love that you came back and gave me this. Thank you. THANK YOU.
thruterryseyes
Mar. 29th, 2009 02:05 pm (UTC)
oh, and I figure I must be the friend who smacks you and says snap out of it....
gaelicspirit
Apr. 2nd, 2009 02:03 am (UTC)
I always told you that you reminded me of Cher. Now you know why.
looselyspeaking
Mar. 29th, 2009 05:17 pm (UTC)
I loved this eppy and I loved your review.

For once I did actually get it from the go get, well after seeing the two boys new lifestyles, the penny dropped, makes a change for me.

Dean, what can I say, suited and booted is just yummie, absolutely love a guy in well cut threads.

Jane :)
gaelicspirit
Apr. 2nd, 2009 02:04 am (UTC)
Hi there!! Yay for you getting it from the go get! :) Hee.

absolutely love a guy in well cut threads

See, the funny thing is, I'm more inclined to fall for the blue collar man, but this look of Dean's... whooo... boy. Shoot, just DEAN. :)
jennygeee
Mar. 31st, 2009 06:16 pm (UTC)
I'm late replying to this Gaelic because to be honest I don't really know how I feel about this episode.

I started watching it and had a huge smile on my face - I love the Kinks (not necessarily that track though) and wow wasn't Dean beautiful in this!

I liked the 'feel' of the episode but to be honest I would have been much happier if it had been a Trickster again.

I’m worried that this is the end of Dean’s PTSD, and now he’ll be back to 'normal' when I was looking forward to lots more angst! How can 2 minutes talking to an angel – albeit a ' high up on the ladder' angel - cure 40 years in hell!!

After last weeks episode I expected so much more and was disappointed, I hope I'm wrong because how on earth could Dean get over what happened last week - just like that.

I suppose we'll find out soon enough, but, although this is not my least favourite episode by a long way, it's the first time I've really been disappointed. Probably after the enormity of last weeks eppy.

I did, however, feel a little better after reading this.
xx
jennygeee
Mar. 31st, 2009 06:24 pm (UTC)
Just read some of the other comments and can see that I'm not on my own (thought I might be). I have to add that I cringed when Zac(whatever) told Dean to stop whining!! urghhh!!!! My heart went out to Dean last week and then this week he had an angel telling him to 'pull himself together'. Just don't think he would be able to get over it that quickly and easily - But I do trust Kripke and I can't wait to see how it pans out.
xx
(no subject) - gaelicspirit - Mar. 31st, 2009 07:05 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jennygeee - Mar. 31st, 2009 07:26 pm (UTC) - Expand
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