Gaelicspirit (gaelicspirit) wrote,
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Stream of Consciousness, Episode 6.15

*claps* Well done, Show. Well done.

Cut, print, check the gate!

 

Okay, so I said last week that I’m not really a big fan of meta episodes. I didn’t NOT like Monster at the End of this Book and The Real Ghostbusters. They just weren’t my favorites. I enjoy the escape, the fantasy. I enjoy living in their world during this time and allowing myself to believe, just for an hour a week, that these guys are real and they’re out there fighting. I mean, that’s always been the great thing about fiction for me: pretending that there is a world where dragons are slain and the servants get to be princesses.

I didn’t read much about this one going in—no spoilers and all—but I couldn’t help but hear tidbits here and there, especially after the previews from last week. However, because it’s our show and these guys are our heroes, I decided to remain cautiously optimistic and not jump to any meta-conclusions before I hunkered down in my yoga pants with my clutch pillow (standard SPN-watching attire).

It paid off. I really enjoyed myself.

Was it omg the funniest thing on TV in the history of ever? No, but it was pretty darn funny. And what’s more, I appreciated the humor and what they were doing. Why take one of the last episodes we have left this season and go out in left field with it? Because they can. Because they aren’t like any other show out there. Because they know we love them and will continue to watch. Because they don’t take themselves seriously.

And in my opinion, that. is. awesome.

I gotta say, I enjoyed this one as much as I enjoyed the Buffy musical, “Once More With Feeling.” And I bought that CD. What? It was good! *hums Walk Through The Fire*

Aside from the antics—and oh my, but there were antics galore (Sam and Dean as actors…good Lord) that I’ll get to in a moment—there was a thread of the mytharc through the episode (some in rather strange, is it real or is it not ways) that we really needed. Well, I really needed, anyway. Plus? We got the brothers coming together again and again and realizing just how lucky they are to have each other and their scary, dirty, angel-filled world. Getting a chance to appreciate what you have when you’re standing in what some consider greener grass is a blessing not many people receive.

Maybe it was funny because I didn’t feel like they were poking at fans directly—more at themselves, really. Though, no one was left out—creators, actors, and fans alike.

Okay, so, blah blah blah, Gaelic, get on with it, right?

So with the THEN, we see enough to remind us about the angel Civil War, Meg and her blood phone, and a quick, remember Ruby? In the NOW, the boys are at Bobby’s researching something…squicky looking. It’s storming to high Heaven, no pun intended, and Dean’s sitting at Bobby’s desk, mournfully trying to tap out the last few drops of whiskey into a tumbler.

Sam walks in with an armful of books and asks where Bobby is. Dean tells him that he’s gone out to get supplies. They’re out of “hunter’s helper.” Heh. Sam’s face does that twitch where he instinctively wants to remark that Dean shouldn't be drinking so much but stops himself because by now he knows that drinking is sometimes—quite literally—the only thing that gets Dean through the day. Which…hmmm.

But, that’s a bigger discussion for a different ramble.

Before Sam can do much more than twitch his eyebrows, Balty bops in very British and in a big stinkin’ hurry. Dean stands up quickly and the boys gape at the angel all, buzzahhh….

Balty (without preamble): You’ve seen The Godfather, right? You know the part where Michael Corleone sends his men to kill his enemies in one, big, bloody swoop?

He’s moving around the room, obviously looking for something. Dean backs up a step and mumbles, “Hey, Balthazar.”

He has to be having a mini-freak-out inside…especially if he has any idea what Balty told Sam the last time we saw him—how much he hated Dean. How much he wanted to see him dead. ‘Course, we have no idea if Sam even remembers that. Which made this little show of Balty’s rather suspicious...until the end.

Balty pours salt (I think?) into a caldron while recounting the deaths of each of the baddies (so to speak) in The Godfather.

Dean: I said ‘hey.’

Balty (patting Dean’s shoulder with a placating smile): You did. Twice. Good for you.

He starts to mutter, “Blood of lamb….” looking around. He kinda whooshes to the fridge, opening it up and peering inside.

Balty: Beer…pizza…blood of lamb! Yes!

Bobby’s got himself one freaky fridge. You look in mine you’d see milk, Gogurt, Coke, leftover chicken, beer, pizza, and *goes to check*…nope. No lamb’s blood.

Sam: Why are you talking about The Godfather?

Balty whooshes back over to the caldron and says, “Because that’s what we’re in right now. And, in the role of Michael Corleone, the Archangel, Raphael.

Dean moves around to stand next to Sam, keeping his eyes on Balty, demanding to know what the angel is talking about. Balty starts tearing up Bobby’s desk looking for something and finally finds the bone of…some kind of Saint. I didn’t catch it. Either time.

Balty: Your Mr. Singer does keep a beautiful pantry.

Mixing his concoction, Balty heads over to the window by the couch and says that Cas has gone deep underground and Raphael put a hit out on every Samaritan who has helped him out—including the brothers and Balty. Now, here’s where I knew there would be some kind of twist at the end because no way Balty was all about getting the brothers out of there just because an angelic hit man was after them.

Sam maybe, but not Dean. He hates Dean. So, something else was up, that much was clear.

Balty paints some kind of symbol with the blood mix on the window.

Sam: You expect us to just believe you?

Balty: Or don’t. He’ll go through you either way.

There’s a snap-fizz sound like electricity and Balty straightens up with a, “That’s all the time we have!”

He pulls his coat aside to retrieve something and exposes a wound on his side—apparently Raphael sent one of his “nasties” after Balty. He was flattered. He grabs something and hands it to Sam—turns out it’s a key, like the kind you get at a gym locker—but I couldn’t tell that at first. An invisible force of power throws Balty across the room and a scary-looking angel hit man dude stalks forward from the kitchen area. Balty screams, “RUN!” and thrusts his hands out, lifting the boys off their feet and throwing them through the window where they land…

…on a big stunt air mattress.

They look up, totally baffled, as the crew claps. A crewmember walks over and says, “Great fall,” before smacking Dean on the rear. No, seriously! *wants to be that crew member*

The boys are still looking around with twin, what the ffffuuu…expressions as the director calls out, “Jensen, Jared, great job!”

And….marker.

I love our show.

The boys stand up, still on the mat, and look back inside “Bobby’s house” while the Director and the (I’m guessing, I know nothing about who does what in film) Assistant Director talk about the shot.

Sam (peering around him and then at the crew): So…no angels. Should we be killing anybody?

Dean: I don’t think so.

Sam: Running?

Dean: Where?

Now, to give our guys their due, this ain’t their first alternate reality rodeo. After all, they’ve been trapped in a world of TV shows where Dean was shot and Sam turned into a car. Dean’s been in a djinn-poisoned reality where Mary never died. They know that alternate realities are possible when you tangle with the powers angels wield. This is a good thing because they were able to (disconcertedly) roll with this situation rather than curl up on that stunt mat and bawl like babies.

Which is probably what anyone else would have done, *cough* Misha *cough*.

The crew continues to talk about resetting the shot because of…a lighting issue? I think? And the AD says it would take 90 minutes to reset the window and that would mean they’d have to blow the scene where the boys sit on the Impala and talk about their feelings.

Director: HA! Right. You answer the hate mail!

*cackles* What? We love our emo scenes as much as the bad-ass fight scenes. We are a complicated group, we fans. *grins*

Meanwhile, the boys are still looking around, befuddled. They pick up a piece of glass and realize it’s fake—made of some kind of wobbly plastic. The crew agrees to a freeze-frame after the boys fly out the window and call out a “wrap on Jensen and Jared.” The lighting goes up and Sam looks over with a vague, “Who are….”

Just then, Assistant #1 comes over and takes his arm, pulling him one way while Assistant #2 takes Dean’s arm and pulls him another way. Asst #2 sits Dean in a chair and says she’s just going to help him take off his make-up.

Dean: I’m not wearing any—oh, crap. I’m a painted whore.

Heh.

Elsewhere, a Trish Evian is interviewing Sam while Sam looks around, puzzled and trying to get a grip on what’s happening. Trish, speaking so rapidly I’m convinced she’s the Micro-Machine Man’s daughter, says, “You beat the devil, lost your soul, and got it back again, what’s next for Sam Winchester?”

Sam’s like *blink* *blink*.

Sometime later, the boys are walking away from their respective locations and meet back up again.

Dean: They put freakin’ make-up on us, the bastards!

Sam: I know what this is—it’s a TV show.

Dean: Ya think?

Sam: No, here. This place—this Twilight Zone that Balty zapped us into is a place where our lives are a TV Show.

Dean: Why?

Sam: I don’t know.

Dean: No, seriously, why would anybody want to watch our lives?

Dean, sweetie, there’s not enough hours in what remains of this day to list the reasons. *sighs happily*

Sam: According to the interviewer, not very many people do.

(Yeah, but what we lack in number we make up for in passion.)

Sam: We’re somewhere where you’re Jensen Ackles and I’m something called a Jared Padalecki.

Dean: So, what, now you’re Polish?

HA!

They head outside soundstage 4 and Dean immediately sees the Impala. His body sags with relief.

Dean: At least my baby made it!

He spies a prop guy dousing the car with dirt and his face twists up in rage. Calling out, “Hey!” he heads toward him, but pulls up short when he sees multiple Impalas, all in various conditions—some beat to Hell. He puts his hands out to his sides and Sam looks at him worriedly.

Dean: I feel sick. I’m gonna be sick.

Sam gapes at the Impala harem silently. They start walking through the set, eyes down, but looking around.

Dean: I wanna go home. I feel like this whole place is bad touching me.

Sam: Yeah. I know. Me, too.

Dean: What do you think?

Sam: Cas?

Dean: Our best shot. If he’s still alive.

They duck off into a side alcove and Dean bows his head, praying, “Dear Castiel, who art hiding in Heaven, we pray that you have your ears on…breaker breaker?”

Just then, through the fake alley, they see Cas standing off alone, trench coat and all. Relieved they hurry over and start bombarding him with questions.

Dean: What did Balty do to us?

Cas pauses, drops his chin and in a very Batman-esque voice rumbles, “To keep you out of Virgil’s reach, he’s cast you into an alternate reality, similar to ours in some respects but dramatically different in others.”

Okay, I admit to Friday-night brain-fade. It took me until mid-way through the episode to realize who the heck ‘Virgil’ was—the angel hit man. In fact, I thought Cas said “the Virgin’s reach” at first and only later realized that it was Virgil when I figured out who the heck ‘Virgil’ was. I think I need to figure out the CC on my TV. *laughs at self*

Dean: So, like…bizzarro Earth.

Cas: Um…yeah, well, no time to explain.

He asks Sam for the key (which was my ah-ha! It was a key! moment) and says it’s to a room where Balty holds all of Heaven’s weapons and with those weapons, Cas can rally his forces. Which, is actually what happens, but it’s totally bizzarro world because here, it’s all scripted and fake—so some things are fake, except that they're actually real, and others are fake because they are fake.

Got it? Great. *glances to the side*

Anyway! Sam gives Cas the key and asks him what was up with all this TV crap.

Dean: Amen, Padaleski.

Sam: Lecki.

Dean: Huh?

Sam: Pretty sure.

Cas—in a very not-Cas voice—begins flipping through a script and says, “Man! Did they put out new pages?”

*LAUGH!*

Dean: What?

Sam: Is this some kind of a cosmic joke?

Dean grabs the script and looks at it, growling, “This isn’t Cas! His name is Misha.” He looks at Misha. “Misha?!”

Misha: You guys wanna run lines or what?

Sam grabs the key back from Misha and the boys exit stage left, Dean muttering, “Misha? Jensen? What’s up with the names around here?”

*giggles*

Misha calls out to them: Guys! You really punked me! I’m totally gonna tweet this one! (typing) Hola! Mishamigos. J2 got me good.

Dean: I just want to dip my finger in my brain and scratch until we’re back in KS.

Ooo—scratch at your brain? Freudian slip, Dean? *considers*

Misha (still typing—after all, there are 140 characters): Really starting to feel like one of the guys.

*BWAH!* Misha’s ‘tweets’ cracked me up.

As they’re stalking away, they start to pass by a BIG trailer. Sam sees the name “J. Ackles” on the side.

Dean: Hey, that’s fake me. This must be fake mine!

They go inside. There is a big ol’ fish tank on one side and a remote-controlled helicopter sitting on a table. Playing on the far wall on a big flat-screen TV are dailies (and what looks like possible excerpts from a gag reel, based on the play-time Jared gives the camera) and a laptop sits open on another table. Sam sits down at the laptop ready to see who “Jensen Ackles” really is.

Dean: He’s not a hunter, but he plays one on TV.

Dean picks up a recent SPN mag and scoffs, “Look at these male model sonsabitches. Nice Blue Steel, Sam.”

*grins*

Sam: Apparently that’s our job.

He sits back and tilts his head in a matter of fact manner, then says, “Okay, you’re from Texas. Says here you were on a soap opera.”

He shows Dean a clip of Jensen from Days of Our Lives…something about Eric Brady caring about the girl’s health…very dramatic and…soapy. Dean closes the laptop quickly with a look of horror.

Dean: I don’t like this universe, Sammy. We need to get out of this universe.

They figure they’re out of ‘soul phone’ range, so they’re on their own. But Dean watched Balty’s every move (that’s our boy) and not only that, Balty rattled off the ingredients of his…potion…thing, so he figures they just need to recreate the spell and bam. No place like home.

They head back to “Bobby’s house” and realize, belatedly, that there’s nothing there they can use—it’s all fake.

Meanwhile, the Director and AD are watching and remark that at least they’re talking to each other. Reminded me of an oft-quoted line (in my family, anyway) from the movie City Slickers: “We’re lost, but we’re making good time.”

I agree with Dean—they need to get out of this universe.

They decide that they need to get into the real world and head to the dirty Impala, realizing too late that the reason the car is running so badly is that it’s a prop. It’s one thing to be zapped into a world of make-believe TV shows…it’s quite another to have your LIFE turned into a TV show. How bassackwards the world had to seem to them!

So, they get a driver—Clif, naturally—to drive them into town. Clif asks “Jensen” if he wants to be dropped somewhere and Dean’s like, “I’ll just tag along with…”

Sam: Jared.

Clif: Since when are you guys talking?

Sam: I, uh, think we’re gonna go back to my place and…

Dean: Work on our acting. For our characters. In the show.

“Clif” glances back at them in the rear-view mirror all oooookay. Dean peers out through the windows muttering, “Where are we, anyway?”

They pass the sign for Vancouver just then.

Dean: Dude. We’re not even in America.

He sounds so irritated it’s endearing. Though…perhaps not for our Canadian friends. *clears throat*

They pull up to a GINORMOUS house—seriously, we’re talking Daddy Warbucks here. They head inside and it’s decked out with wood and tile and those multi-colored, life-size Warhol photo-slash-art things that rich people always have of themselves on TV shows.

Sam: Wow. I must be the star of this thing.

*BWAH!!* Oh, now that is funny. Especially since in this bizzarro world, so much of what we know to be true about our guys is the opposite—them not talking for example—and yet…some of it is true, just a tongue-in-cheek exaggeration of the truth. This, though, had me smirking with a tip-of-the-hat respect to Ben Edlund and his raised-eyebrow approach to the “who gets more attention” continuing debate among us.

They see a tanning bed in the entry way.

Sam: What am I? Dracula?

Dean lifts the lid, exposing the tanning lights.

Dean: A George Hamilton Dracula.

Dean spies a nicely appointed liquor cabinet and makes a beeline, but before he can pour himself a drink, he hears a noise and peers through the curtain-covered window.

Dean: Dude…you have a camel in your backyard.

Just then, Genevieve Padalecki shows up at the top of the stairs, dressed in a pretty black cocktail dress and looking contemptuously down at Dean.

Gen: It’s an alpaca, dumbass.

The boys turn in unison and gape.

Dean (fearful): Ruby?

Sam looks at Dean with a very clear what the hell expression of near-panic.

Gen lifts and eyebrow and continues down the stairs. “Ruby. Right. ‘Cause that one never gets old.”

Gen walks up and kisses Sam—as any wife would when their husband comes home—and Sam stiffens awkwardly while Dean looks on, his face the picture of “YIKES!”

As realization seeps in, Dean exclaims, “Wait…you and Ruby?”

Gen: Do you honestly think that’s funny, Jensen?

Dean’s scrambling to cover his obvious blunder so that they can continue to fit in until they get what they need.

Dean: You’re not…Ruby. You’re the lovely actress who plays Ruby and you’re in Jared’s house because you two are (he glances up on the mantel piece and sees a wedding photo)…MARRIED! (he looks at Sam) You married fake Ruby?!

Sam’s face is priceless. The expressions of wtf combined with she’s really hot and peppered with I have no idea what to say here is hilarious.

Gen looks at Sam, puzzled and asks what he’s doing.

Sam (quickly): WORK! (with a forced relaxed expression) Work….

Dean: I just thought I’d pop in and say hey. (pause) Hey. Maybe run some lines….

Gen: You’ve never even been to our house.

Dean: Well, now that I know there’s an alpaca out back, I’m definitely coming back.

*LAUGH!*

Gen: Well, alpaca’s are the greenest animal.

What?? *laughs more* She was killing me. I thought she did a great job playing ‘fake Sam’s fake wife’. Nicely done.

Dean: Yeah. That is so important

Gen looks at Sam and says she has to get to that thing. When he looks clueless she huffs a little and reminds him of the “International Otter Adoption charity dinner.” Sam’s like, oh, right. She kisses him goodbye and Dean looks to the side. They both watch her walk away and Sam says quietly so that only Dean can hear, “I should figure out her name.”

In Sam’s office—which, seriously, this show…the computer screen is bigger than my desk and flanking either side of the gigantic desk are suits of armor and behind him is a rather LARGE picture of JP dressed up John Wayne-style—the boys are looking up the ingredients for Balty’s spell. Sam finds the bone of a Saint thingy they need and Dean calculates how long it would take to travel there to steal it and get back.

Or…Sam holds up JP’s black card and suggests they just buy it. Cha-ching! Dean happily maxes out a few of JP’s credit cards buying stuff to be shipped to them for the spell. Once done, he rises, stretches, and eyes a nice, large, black leather couch.

Dean: Couch, TV star, beauty rest.

Done and done.

Sam gets up, gets a beer and starts wandering the maze-like halls of fake his house. Gen comes home and he stumbles over her name a bit. She smiles at him a bit bemusedly. He asks her if she remembers all the disasters from a year ago—the earthquakes and tsunamis and whatnot. She’s like, uh, yeah…from last season on your show.

He’s like, huh. Right.

Smiling, she takes his hand and says that he’s been Sam Winchester for too long, then leads him (rather willingly) upstairs. I think we all know what happened next. Moving on!

Clif takes the boys to the airstrip the next morning to pick up a package before it goes through customs. He wants to know if they’re doing anything illegal.

Sam: Would it make you feel better if we said no?

Back at fake Bobby’s they’re trying to set up the spell, but the director walks in all happy that they’re there early. Dean says they need the set cleared for like an hour so that they can do…actor stuff. The director is like, that’s nice. And no.

Sam is sitting over on their chairs and Misha sits down in his—positioned behind JP and JA. He sees the box and remarks, “Oh, priority! What’s in it?”

Sam, distracted by watching Dean’s conversation with the director, mutters, “A part of a dead person.” Misha blinks a bit at him.

Dean returns with a semi-nervous smile and says, “Okay, so bad news. Looks like we’re going to have to do a little…acting.”

And this? Was the funniest part of the whole episode. Seriously.

Dean, Sam, and Misha (dressed as Cas) are standing in fake Bobby’s office and Misha is talking in a (slightly exaggerated) Batman voice about Balty knowing Raphael won’t take him back. Sam freezes completely the moment they all ACTION—all except for his mouth that twitches in the most adorable flinch. Dean is staring at Misha with such concentration I expected the man’s hair to catch fire.

When it’s Dean’s cue, he moves forward stiffly, then side-steps to his mark.

CUT!

Take 8, same scene. This time Sam’s trying to figure out what to do with his arms—across the body, hands on hip, one behind him. Dean is still moving robot-like toward his mark, then manages to grind out, “Dean grimly and yet somehow you’ve got no problem with it.”

CUT!

Misha turns to the camera and mouths, what. the. hell?

I laughed so hard my husband looked up from his soccer game to toss me a raised eyebrow.

It doesn’t get much better for them. Next take (same scene) Sam is talking in an uncertain, breathy voice while staring into the camera, “That’s because we have no other choice.”

Dean (aside to him) says, “Don’t look at the camera—look anywhere but at the camera.”

So, Sam tries again, this time looking directly up. “That’s because we have no other choice.”

CUT! (The director mutters, “For the love of….”)

Dean’s shaking himself awake as they go for another take of the same scene. Sam steps forward and very awkwardly puts out one hand as if he’s gesturing in a song as he says, “If there’s a key,” then he shoves his other hand forward, fingers of both hands stiff like a Barbie-dolls, “there has to be a lock…we need the weapons,” both hands are out at this point, more-or-less thrust between Dean and Misha, “and the lock…I’d imagine we’d have the lock….”

This is repeated about three times. I was rather weak from laughter by the time they moved on to Dean’s next line.

Dean (rough and growly): We need to get all that crap!

Sam looks at him, confused: What?

Dean (in a side whisper with his face set in a snarl): That’s how he does it.

CUT!

Finally, Dean looks out at the crew and shouts, “Do we really need all these lines?! I think we covered it!”

The Director looks at his crew and asks if they have anything they can use. The boys return to their chairs and Sam is thumbing through his script.

Sam: Who wrote this?! Nobody says ‘penultimate’!

*HA!*

Dean: Gun. Mouth. Now.

They decide to move on and Sam and Dean take their box of contraband and head back into fake Bobby’s office.

Misha (tweeting): IMHO, J & J had a late one last night. ROTFLMAO

Dean and Sam are digging stuff out of the box while the director is on the phone with Sera (and I think it might actually be her voice). He says the terror alert is at orange and that the boys started talking to each other. Sera’s like, that’s a good thing. The Director—who, by the way, is Bob Singer…but I didn’t realize that until later in the episode. However, I’m tired of just calling him “The Director” so let’s just get that out of the way—it’s Bob. Bob Singer. *smiles*

Anyway, Bob says he thought it would be good, too, but now Jensen…and then I can’t hear what he says because we shift to the boys where Dean is painting the symbol on the glass in lamb’s blood. Back with Bob, the AD is saying, “Misha’s celebrity tweet says it’s a black market organ thing. I’m betting drugs.”

So, I think whatever Bob said to Sera that I couldn’t hear/understand was something about Jensen being a bad influence on Jared. Or whatever. Bob tells Sera that they lost any shred of talent they ever had and just then, the boys come crashing through the window—the spell having very obviously not worked. Dean grunts a low, “Ow. That one hurt.”

They head back to J. Ackles’ trailer and are frustrated because they did the spell exactly right—only it didn’t work. Sam concludes that it can’t…because monsters and demons are all pretend in this world.

Dean: No demons, no Hell, no Heaven…no God?

Sam: No angels.

Elsewhere, however, on a motel room set, that symbol appears on a window and Virgil The Angel Hit Man comes crashing through.

Duh duh duhhhh.

The boys are walking around the set, passing a fake fight on green screen by a fake Impala talking about getting back to America and away from Hockey Talk. I’m not sure where they’re heading, but they look lost. Sam wants to go one way, Dean another, and Dean heads down a fake alley. Sam goes to follow and suddenly sees Virgil standing there. He calls out Dean’s name in alarm and warning but is too late. Virgil reaches out and presses his hand to Dean’s head and…

…nothing happens. It’s a mojo-free-zone, which means it’s on. The boys take on the angel, fighting in a good dual rhythm and starting to win when the stunt coordinator sees this, calls the two stunt guys who were fake fighting to come help him and they pull the boys off the angel. Just before he runs away, though, Virgil grabs the key from Sam.

Sam tries to wrestle out of the grip holding him back and Dean bellows at the fleeing angel, “I’m gonna break your friggin’ neck!”

That made my toes curl a bit. Don't judge me.

We head to a conference room were Bob, Jim (?) and the AD are sitting around a spider conference phone, talking to Sera. She’s like, “I’m trying to understand, Bob….”

Bob: It appears that Jensen and Jared were seen beating an extra to death.

Jim: It wasn’t all the way to death. Only partly.

AD: He could still run.

Hee!

Bob: I think the real issue here is that the boys seem to be on some kind of extended psychedelic acid trip.

Sera wants to come and talk to them, but the men are all, not a good idea, they don’t even know who you are, you’re new…. Bob wants Kripke to come up and Sera is like, “I’m supposed to be running this show! Besides, Eric is in some cabin writing his next Pilot.”

Bob: He sold Octocobra? My God. They’ll buy anything.

*cracks up*

The boys are somewhere on the set talking about Virgil breaking through to this universe and how he’s stuck here with them. Dean still wants to kick his ass. Elsewhere, Misha is leaving for the day (wearing a rather unfortunate choice for a sweater) and climbs into his car all happy-faced and grinning. He pauses after buckling up, then digs out his cell.

Misha (tweeting): Ever get that feeling that someone’s in the back seat? Frowny-face.

And then, Virgil the Angel Hit Man pops up from the back seat and presses a knife against Misha’s throat causing him to totally squeal like a girl. Virgil tells him to drive. Uh-oh.

Boys head to fake Bobby’s and director Bob is there waiting for them and wants to know if this act of theirs is about getting more money. Dean scoffs that they pay “these two jokers” enough money as it is. Bob is like, “I’d like to think that we’ve worked together long enough you don’t think of me as Director Bob or Executive Producer Bob Singer, but more like Uncle Bob.”

Dean: What kind of a douchebag names a character after himself?

Sam: Oh, that’s not right.

*cackles*

Bob: You can’t come to work on poppers and smuggle kidneys in from Mexico and make up your own lines. Think about your careers!

Sam, meanwhile, is realizing that the key is no longer in his pocket. Whoops.

Sam: Screw our careers, Bob.

Sam takes off and Dean steps forward, staring Bob down.

Dean: You heard my brother. That’s right. I said brother. We’re not actors. We’re hunters. We’re the Winchesters. Always have been, always will be. Where we’re from, no one knows us, but we matter to that world. Even saved it once or twice. And here…maybe there are some fans that give a crap about this nonsense. But tell me this, Bob Singer—if that is your real name—what does it all mean?

I tell you what, I wanted to cheer when he was done. *mini cheer* It was good to hear Dean say that he matters to the world. I mean, sure, he said it in the context of ‘we’ meaning him and Sam, but he was part of that equation and he realized that he mattered. Even if it was only to shove what he perceived as a crapload of crap down some guys throat, he said he mattered. *loved that*

Bob, however, missed the point completely: Okay! This is good! I mean, we’ve all had our psychotic breaks, right? We can work with this!

Sam hurries back and grabs Dean, saying that Virgil has the key.

Dean (to Bob): We quit.

Meanwhile, Virgil makes poor Misha pull over into some alley and forces him out of the car and down the alley. Misha is totally crying and Virgil roughly shoves him up against the wall, lamenting that there’s no magic in this world and Misha should thank him for what he’s about to do. A homeless man sees this and stands up from his little alley alcove.

Just when I was all they wouldn’t…they totally did. Virgil cuts Misha’s throat and calls for Raphael’s help on a blood phone. So that’s why they showed us Meg at the beginning. Huh. Gotta say—didn’t see that coming.

Back at ginormous casa de Jared, the boys are figuring they’ll just put out an APB on Virgil since he’s normal like they are and Gen comes out, bawling—mascara running down her face, the works. She cries out that Misha’s been stabbed to death.

In unison, the boys ask, “Where?”

Incredulous, Gen replies, “Where?!”

Y’know, it’s funny, but it’s not. It was hard to say if this world meant so little to them—because it was totally not real as they define reality and therefore the people here were not any more real to them than the people in the djinn-induced reality were—or if death has come to mean so little to them after all they’ve been through. I have to think the former because the death of either one of them now would pretty much destroy the other.

Apparently she tells them where Misha was killed, because they show up at the crime scene—I’m guessing Clif is driving them around everywhere?—and walk past the body covered up by a sheet to spy the homeless man telling the cops that the killer called out to Raphael, “…like the Ninja Turtle.” Oh boy.

The homeless man hesitantly (because it sounds flippin' crazy to anyone else but our boys) tells them that he heard a voice that said for Virgil to go back to the place he jumped through and Raphael would reach through the window and pull him and the key home. Dean gives the homeless man some money—Canadian.

Sam: If Virgil gets back with the key, Cas is dead and our world is toast.

Dean: Then we stop him. How bad can an angel with no wings be?

Oh, Dean! Don’t say that! Have you learned nothing?! Asking how bad it could be is like saying, “we have all the time in the world.” Famous last words…..

So, we see Virgil in a gun store buying a handgun and asking for a pump action all Terminator-style. He tells the sales man that he’s the keeper of Heaven’s weapons right before he cracks him in the face with the butt of the shotgun, then shoots the next customer coming through the door. Yikes.

The boys are waiting at fake Bobby’s. At first I couldn’t figure out why they were there, but then I realized they didn’t know that Virgil came in a different way from them, so they were waiting for him to return. Dean is pacing, Sam leaning against a doorframe. Both seem lost in their own thoughts until Dean speaks up, warning Sam that if they drop Virgil and get the key, they could be stuck here. He’s wondering if Sam might be okay with that.

Dean: No Hell below us, above us only sky….

Sam: Our friends are back there.

Dean: Yeah, but here you’ve got a good life. Back there, the hits have been coming since you were six months old.

*rubs heart*

Aw, Dean. Of course you’d look at it that way—it’s what you do. Put him first. His well-being, his happiness. But the last twenty-six (or so) years haven’t exactly been a cake-walk for you, either, buddy.

Dean: Here you’re a bazillionaire, married to Ruby, the whole package. It’s no contest.

As Dean’s talking, Sam’s lips do that fold down, you’ve got a point frown. But then he just shakes his head.

Sam: You know you were right. We just don’t mean the same thing here. We’re not even brothers here, man.

And that’s enough. And that’s what matters. And that’s what I think we’re supposed to walk away from this with—aside from a good laugh at ourselves and some (minor) forward movement with the Civil War. Dean will put Sam first because that’s what Dean does, and he’s okay with that and it’s how he feels it’s supposed to be. That, and they’re brothers, and that’s the main thing that matters to them, the one thing that will keep them swinging, keep them coming back, make them remember that they matter.

Doesn’t mean that there won’t be something else outside of the Winchester Code for each of them—a new destiny, a new story, a path to take. But this is what I think they were telling us, ultimately, with this story. Sam’s soul is back, and Dean said a (temporary, hopefully) good bye to his surrogate family, and now they face what comes next (whatever it is, because they haven’t really given us a lot of solid clues) together.

Dean: Let’s get our crazy show back home.

That says it all, doesn’t it? Any way you want to interpret it.

Out on the lot, a car pulls up and “Eric Kripke” gets out. I don’t recognize the actor, but he’s built a lot like the real Kripke. He heads up to Bob Singer all coiled energy, talking like he just finished his 5th Red Bull.

Kripke: Bob! Dude! What the hell, right?

Bob and Kripke talk (quickly) about how Misha’s death, while tragic, did actually get them on the cover of Vanity Fair. Kripke decides he’s just going to go into the boys’ trailers, guns blazing and—just then, though, the “extra” that Sam and Dean beat up arrives on set and Kripke’s all, “I’ll handle all of this now.”

He approaches Virgil bellowing, “Extra!” like a 1920’s newsie and Virgil pulls out the shotgun and starts blasting away. With spaghetti Western-type music playing in the background, Virgil blows away Kripke in a totally bloody (and not at all symbolic...*cough*) display, then turns his gun on Bob Singer and takes him down before heading onto the parts of the set and shooting other crew members.

Drawn by the sound of gunfire (I assume) the boys show up. Sam yells out at Virgil and distracts him while Dean sacks him in a football-worthy tackle. The force of their fight carries them into another set—which just so happens to be the motel set that Virgil entered through. Working together, the brothers knock Virgil cold, grabbing the key. Just then the symbol on the window starts to glow and the brothers realize they’re in trouble. They try to run, but too late.

Raphael grabs them through the window—and we freeze-frame just before the commercial. Fake Bob Singer would have been proud.

They land hard in the real world, pushing themselves shakily to their feet to face…a striking-looking African American woman. Okay, that I didn’t see, either. And it just occurred to me that poor Virgil is now stuck in fake world with no powers. That’s gotta suck.

The woman turns out to be Raphael’s new body as Balty turned his other one with the lightning wings into a pillar of salt. I liked the other body better, but I’ll roll with it.

Dean: Dude looks like a lady.

Raphael raises the Fist Of Pain and the boys double over. Raphael grabs the key from Sam’s limp hand, and just then, Balty shows up. Raphael releases the boys, who half-stand, watching the angelic exchange while working to catch their breath. Balty tells Raphael that the key she—she? He? Ack, that’s confusing. The key will open a locker in a bus station—he doesn’t have the weapons anymore. He needed to buy some time to move them, so he sent Sam and Dean on this whole alternate reality wild good chase to distract Raphael and give himself the time he needed.

I knew it had to be something like that—using them. No way was he trying to ‘save’ them by sending them there. Raphael moves in to strike Balty down when Castiel shows up. In a very cool display of wings and a shiver of power he tells Raph that he has the weapons. Dean’s face as he looks at the real Castiel is a mixture of relief, awe, and disbelief.

Cas tells Raph that if he/she doesn’t want to die tonight, he/she should go. So, Raph does. Which, personally? I needed more info as to why he just let Raphael go free if he now had enough power to kill him and stop this. Except for the fact that Castiel is a good angel and Raphael is, technically, his brother, so…. *huffs* I think I just want more. They had a really good opportunity to give us more details about this whole war and Cas' role in it and why he's shifted from acting like he and Dean have a 'profound bond' to being cold and harsh about Dean's choice to save his brother's soul. I wanted to know just what kind of pressure Cas has been under that's making it not only that he isn't able to hang out with the boys and help when they call, but is also now pulling them into the trouble.

Cas sends Balty off and then zaps the boys back to Bobby’s. Dean’s a bit put out (and rightly so) that Cas knew about this crazy plan of Balty’s to send them to bizzarro world, but Cas just said that it had to be done, and that if he loses against Raph, everyone loses.

Dean: We know the stakes, Cas! It’s all you’ve told us!

Yeah! Exactly! We need DETAILS, man!

Cas just says he’ll explain when he can (which I predict to be around episode 21) and poof, he’s gone. Dean rubs his face in frustration, but Sam makes his way over to the doorway where he was standing just a little while ago in fake Bobby’s house, waiting to jump Virgil. He pounds on the doorframe it a couple of times, then turns to his brother, declaring that it’s real.

Dean: Home sweet home, chock-full of crap that wants to skin ya. Oh, and we’re broke again.

I wonder what he did with all that gold he got from the dragons? *shrug*

Sam (with a half-smile that said more than his words): At least we’re talking.

*deep breath*

I feel like we passed some kind of hurdle. We survived the meta and it wasn’t that bad. Not only that? It was entertaining and tossed some brotherly thoughts our way. Now we can move forward with the storyline. And next week…I don’t even know. I couldn’t assimilate the images it shoved at us in the previews beyond a discordant, “Eeeee!”

If the schedule I saw was right, we have next week (6.16) and then we’re on another hiatus until April 15th. Let me know if you heard anything differently.

Slainte, all. Thanks for reading.

 

Tags: stream of consciousness
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