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Stream of Consciousness, Epi 9.18

So sorry this was late!! I really enjoyed this one. Despite having to wait to see it. And then watch it on a plane. On my Kindle. I may even rewatch it. Just ‘cause.

But, before I start, just a quickie PSA. I had someone message me this week to let me know she was removing me from her friend’s list due to these rambles. It made me sad as she was someone I’d had on my flist for some time and I liked hearing from her. She was kind, and I respect her decision, but before anyone else decides to do the same, let me just say that these rambles are simply one fan’s opinion.

I have always been pretty up-front that while I love the relationship between the brothers and enjoy Sam’s journey, my heart lies with Dean. He is my ‘hero’ and muse. But that in no way implies that I hate Sam or feel that Sam is  bad and wrong.

I very much enjoy the comments left to each review – regardless of if you agree with me in part, in whole, or at all. All I ask is that we all play nice, and truly I believe everyone has. It’s a pleasure to interact with each of you and I apologize to those who may not have spoken up, as my former flistie did, to say that the ramble and/or comments have upset you in any way.

So, with that, and with hopes that those of you who enjoy these streams of consciousness reviews continue to come back, I say let’s Ramble On.

I’m writing this from the plane, which is interesting because it’s one of those smaller, United Express jets and there’s approximately one breath of space between me and my sleeping seatmate. Typing on a tray table with your elbows in makes for some occasional finger cramping. Right now, I’m jealous of Metatron’s cozy writer’s den with the Masterpiece Theater mood music, crackling fire, large oak (or, y’know, walnut, whatever – some sort of dark tree) desk.

Though, I don’t envy the typewriter. How pretentious was that, I ask you? To be so confident of each word, each sentence that he didn’t even use a laptop or have even one bottle of White Out next to him? Pfft.

Before we knew that Metatron was going to be on the list of Big Bads, I remember rambling that I liked his view of writing and storytelling. I liked his turn of phrase and philosophy when it came to stories. It resonated with me then…and it does now. Despite the fact that it has my radar squelching loudly; if I were a dog, the hair on my back would be standing on end.

The idea of someone manipulating and/or in some way capturing the boys' journey isn't new. In season 5, we discovered that Chuck had been chronicling the Winchester’s lives. But with that situation, it was a story, essentially, delivered to him as a prophet. He wrote what had happened. Not what would happen. He didn’t create the reality as it appears Metatron is capable of doing – at least that’s how it seemed to me, based on his creation of the end scene with Castiel and his “flock.”

It’s scary, honestly. How much power does Metatron have to manipulate this reality? How much has he orchestrated already? Clearly there is more to Metatron than meets the eye.

(Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.)

The really intriguing thing, though, is that – as is their apparent destiny – the Winchesters were able to surprise him. He’s clearly not an omnipotent God-like entity or else he would have foreseen Dean and Sam grabbing Gadreel. I like that he can’t predict what they’re going to do; it makes for a bit of a balance with his whole “masterpiece” approach. The concept of creating compelling  characters and then seeing where they lead you as a writer resonates with me – as does the writer knowing the ending of the story, just not exactly how they are going to get there (harkening back to that ‘compelling characters’ thing).

His concepts ring true. But the idea that he “knows the end” of the story is what troubles me. It was obvious before he pointed it out to Castiel that Metatron sees himself as the hero of this story. And in the majority of stories, the hero’s journey ends in victory. The question is, though, what sort of victory would Metatron be looking for?

Himself ‘crowned’ King of Heaven and ruler of the angels? Defeat of the Winchesters? The end of Earth as we know it (aka the 2nd Apocalypse)? Or…would he prefer his story to be chronicled in some annals of history, martyring him to the cause that could have saved Heaven – had the masses only listened? Would he want to follow the path of some of the tragic heroes in the stories he loves so much? He loves a good 'twist' -- but would he love it if the twist completely reversed the roles in his own story?

Honestly, I don’t know at this point and that’s what bothers me.

The thing that helps is that the Winchesters are unpredictable. They caught him by surprise. Knowing our boys, they’ll keep doing that, too. And my hope is that though Cas took up the mantle of leadership and called the angels to him, much to Metatron’s storytelling delight, he too will surprise the angelic scribe and compel the rebellious, disenfranchised angels to defeat whatever plan Metatron has in place.

Because I can only think that plan to be nefarious on some level. There is no way letting Metatron win turns out well for any of our heroes. And Castiel is due for a win. He’s tried so hard for so long to do right. Each time he’s attempted to make a positive difference, he’s veered down the wrong path and only ended up making things worse for him, for the boys, and/or for the world.

If he’s going to lead the angels, it must end in a victory for him. Or nothing. It must.

Storytelling-wise, it would just be dull to recycle the “Cas tried to do the right thing and ended up screwing over the world” approach. And character-wise, Cas has come too far and learned too much about life and humanity and good vs evil to end up in the same situation again. Says me.

Then again, Metatron did say that the 1st rule of writer’s club was to steal from the best. So…who knows. At this point, really, it’s an anything is possible storyline – which I like. It makes me nervous…but I like it.

As I do the way they’re evolving the brother’s individual characters and relationship. Going back in my mind to Sam’s angry declaration several episodes ago that he wanted to keep things “just business” and that Dean thinking he was ‘poison’ wasn’t the real problem with them, coupled with his reveal that he wouldn’t make the same choice Dean did when he allowed Gadreel to possess Sam as the only way to save his life…I think he still means that.

But I think it’s evident he’s softening. Honestly, how could he not? Just as there are no atheists in foxholes (as the saying goes), when you’re forced to fight side-by-side with someone, alternately preventing their death and being saved by them simply while doing your job, it’s difficult to maintain a “just business” relationship with that person. Especially when that person is your brother. And you carry a crap-load of history wherever you go, whatever you claim about your current connection.

Sam’s concern about Dean’s level of “okay” was clear in just about every glance he tossed his brother’s way, not to mention the almost protective nature of his stance when around Dean. I said last episode that he’s not seeing what’s happening with Dean – or not wanting to see it – but after this episode, I think I change my mind. He sees that something is happening, he’s just not sure what it is. Or what to do about it, yet.

IMO, Sam’s never been one to readily admit he might’ve been wrong. And (again, IMO) admitting you’re wrong is not the same thing as apologizing. I don’t think the question here is that Sam needs to apologize about what he said. I think he, as he told Dean, was just being honest. His honesty doesn’t have to be the same honesty as Dean’s. Sam honestly would not take Dean’s choice to live or die away from him. Dean honestly would do the exact same thing he did before if it meant saving Sam’s life. IMO (one more time) that doesn’t make either of them wrong. It…just is.

But I think Sam might be realizing that he was wrong to say they can’t be brothers and need to keep it “just business.” His attitude during this episode was one of a brother. Not a hunting partner.

And if he were able to retract that, or say he changed his mind, or maybe that he has a different opinion now – basically, if he were to give Dean a signal that he wants to be brothers again – Dean might feel safe enough to talk through the turmoil that is so clearly eating him up inside. I don’t think it matters that Sam wouldn’t do for Dean what Dean did for Sam. They’re not the same person. Saving someone doesn’t have to be done in the same manner.

What Dean needs to hear is that he isn’t alone. I don’t mean in the physical sense, either. For him, it’s not about having a hunting partner by his side. He can be by himself, has been by himself, will be by himself. It’s in the emotional sense. It’s in knowing that he has someone on his side. In his corner. That he has a brother.

If he knew that – if Sam were to say that – then there would be a chance for Dean to survive the Mark. Because he’s starting to slip, that much was clear in the episode. It’s been a slow, almost sneaky unraveling all along, but it’s starting to ratchet up and while he’s been able to maintain his control so far, I think it’s only just.

When Metatron told Cas that his stolen grace was going to burn out and would burn him up, I couldn’t help but think of how that very same thing could be said of Dean. The burden of the Mark is burning him up and he can feel it chewing away at his self. What I loved about Dean in this episode, though, is how quietly explosive that slow burn was.

Jensen’s performance often leaves me in awe at how he can convey so much while saying so little. This episode had me wanting to climb inside of it and wrap it around me. I would love to see the script – see what sort of direction he was given in three particular scenes. See how much is him so fully embodying Dean and how much is the writer/director “Metatron” effect.

The first one was the (oh, so brief) moment in the shower. That was interesting on a couple of levels, I thought. The symbolism of cleansing – being unable to wash away the feel of the Mark, the disorder inside of him – was compelling. But on another level, often times a shower is where the world catches up with you.

I mean, how many times has an idea for a work project or a story popped into your head in the shower? Or that forgotten item on your to-do list?  Or the one item you meant to pick up at the grocery store? Or the perfect come-back to an argument you had yesterday? The water cancels the noise of the world and you’re left with only your thoughts. Dean’s thoughts are SCREAMING at him. And it’s all he can do to not slip sideways.

The second was when he was in the bathroom at that abandoned warehouse/factory/thing in Utah. Staring at himself in the mirror, seeing something dark…and yet powerful. It harkened back to the flashback scene in Season 4 after he’d returned from Hell and remembered the nightmare of blood and screams and his own breaking as he stared at himself in the mirror.

In this moment, however, he didn’t remember anything (that we saw, I mean). He just stared with tragic, destroyed eyes set in a stone face, trying to reconcile the words Gadreel had flung at him, while attempting to goad him into killing, with the truth that he wants so badly to believe in his heart. When he looked down at the Mark and back up at himself, you could see the screw it expression slip like quicksilver across his face.

That damn angel had tricked him, betrayed him, killed his friend, and ruined the one relationship that Dean counted on as ‘stone number one.’ And Dean was more than powerful enough to end him. That angel was going to talk or die, that’s all there was to it.
Dean looked scary dangerous as he stalked out of that room, and he hadn’t said a word.

The third one was when Sam returned to find Gadreel on the floor, beaten to a bloody pulp, and Dean sagging against the wall near him, his knuckles bloody and bruised. The way Dean spoke, the look on his face, it almost seemed like he’d been the one beaten instead of the one doing the beating. He sounded shell-shocked, exhausted, almost groggy. His voice was ragged, his words dazed, and he didn’t quite seem to be able to track his vision toward Sam at first.

The way he said that Gadreel wanted to die and that he was going to kill him, but stopped because he knew they needed the angel to talk showed in just a few simple words how much effort that control had taken. The person who is Dean didn’t let the person the Mark was creating inside of him take over. He pulled the killer back, shoved it into a corner, but it took so much out of him that he was physically weak. Of course they didn’t show it, but I wouldn’t have been surprised if Sam had to literally haul him up off the ground to get him to his feet.

In fact…I kinda want to write a missing scene with that moment. *considers*

We have five more episodes, and while not all of them will focus on the primary storyline, they’ve set things up nicely for our a truly compelling journey to the finale for our heroes: Cas as the reluctant leader, hopefully thwarting Metatron’s plan; Sam as the reluctant brother finding his way back to trust, acceptance and forgiveness; Dean as the reluctant killer trying to harness a power inside of him bigger than any he’s faced, fighting to keep the focus on defeating the bad outside before it destroys the good inside.

I can’t wait to see what they bring us next. We’re flying over mountains (CA to KS) now, so I’ll get to the lists, but if the air stays this bumpy, I may make the recap portion of the ramble pretty brief. *blergh*

LOVED:

  • The shower scene. For all the deep, meaningful things I chronicled above, but also for the wonderful eye-candy that is Dean. And his lashes.*needs .gif pronto* I may be heading to tumblr soon….

  • Sam’s angry, “Let’s just find Gadreel and beat some answers out of him.”

  • Angel!Cas acting human (taking and sending a pic of the angel beacon, casually tossing his keys on the motel table, driving, the different inflections in his voice). I think this is my favorite version of Cas.

  • “What’s honorable about a miniature bar in a motel room?” “Everything.”

  • Gabriel. Even though he wasn’t really real. And is also probably still really dead, though we all hope not. #amIright

  • “I used most of my juice to get back into porn. That came out wrong.”

  • Dean and Sam trapping Gadreel in holy fire; that was teamwork at its finest.

  • Sam’s snarl just before he belts Gadreel followed very closely by Dean backing him off and shepherding him away. *toe curl*

  • “You want to sneak onto the Death Star? Take out the Emperor?”

  • The boy’s dual looks of surprise when Castiel recognized the Death Star reference, and was down for going after the Emperor.

  • “Dammit, Dean.”

  • “Hey, Sam. You keep an eye on him.” *much love for that one*

LIKED:

  • Metatron’s musing about who gives the story meaning – the writer, or the reader (watcher/fan)? I actually would put this up under love were it not for the fact that it was posed by Metatron and that just feels wrong. The question made me think long after the episode ended – we as a fandom are proof that the answer is subjective. The meaning the writer of anything intended is not always the same meaning the reader (watcher/fan) takes away from it.

  • Gadreel’s black hoodie/leather jacket combo. I dug it, man. All he needed was to trade the Ford wagon in for a motorcycle and I might’ve been rooting for the bad guy.

  • “What if I fail again?” Oh, Cas. Bless your angel/human/stolen-grace-angel heart.

  • “I hate continuity errors.”

  • “You have been around since scaly things crawled out of the muck! Would it have killed you to pick up a book? Watch a movie?” Gotta say I agree with the little guy there.

  • Cas getting a massive download of books/TV shows/movies. Also kinda jealous about that, tbh.

  • So…there actually is a door to Heaven. If they don’t play Bob Dylan at some point, I’ll be bummed.  However, one of the final episodes really should be named ‘Stairway to Heaven’ to keep with Kripke’s (and Dean’s) Zeppelin love. I’m just sayin’.


MEH:

  • The writers insisting on spelling Castiel’s nickname as “Cass.” Just…no. There is only one s in his name, what is the point of adding the other one? It looks like a female version of the name and totally makes me think of Mama Cass from The Mamas and the Papas. I don’t care if that spelling is technically canon. I refuse to spell it that way. *crosses arms and lifts chin with a huff*

QUESTIONS:

  • Okay, I know I was watching on my Kindle on a plane, so I could have missed it, but did they drop that thread about the kid who had helped them in Utah before? Dean mentions a case in Ogden, Sam says it was a witch thing, Dean tries to remember the kid’s name…but then nothing came of it? Or did it and I missed it?

  • Was anyone else waiting for Gadreel to kill Metatron there at the end? I was honestly surprised when he simply turned and walked away. The look on his face as he listened to Metatron prattle on about well-written characters and knowing the end had me almost convinced he wasn’t buying what the little guy was selling and was ready to cut the line and head straight to the front. After all, he’d come really close to being trapped in chains once more, which had to be terrifying after having spent centuries in Heaven’s jail. I would almost be happy if Gadreel took out Metatron. Something in me still kinda wants him to find redemption.

ABBREVIATED RECAP

The beginning was an interesting fake-out with Metatron’s “Masterpiece Theater” music and his musing about what gives a story meaning. When he says that he’s going to, “tell a story and let you decide,” it appears that he’s actually stomping on that 4th wall and speaking to us. The Heavenly “Metatron” replacement of the opening title card further emphasized the fact that this was not going to be your typical episode.

Thankfully (IMO), we find out later that he was actually speaking to Cas. But before that moment, our friend Cas has to go through a bit of a journey. He discovers a warehouse/factory of some kind (clearly, the United States is littered with such buildings), following a beacon of some kind – tearing the lining of his trench coat as he enters – and finds a dozen dead angels, only one – Hannah – having survived the attack. Castiel heals her and finds out that Gadreel caused this destruction.

He informs the brothers – managing to manipulate his Smart Phone enough to take a picture of the Angel Beacon that he sends it to the boys while they’re talking. While Sam’s doing some google-fu, Cas muses about the honor bar, prompting Dean to speak up for the first time.

I liked the soft smile that crossed Cas’ face when he heard his friend’s voice. Profound bond or no, these two have been through fire together and for each other, Purgatory being only part of it. Both brothers are clearly important to Cas – as proved by the way Cas worked to build Sam back up post de-angeling him – but Dean’s friendship is the kind that keeps Cas human. In a manner of speaking. Dean is his person. We’ve all got one. Or…most of us do. Those who don’t have a much harder go at life.

Dean asks Cas how he’s doing and Cas says he misses his wings.

Cas: Life on the road smells.

Dean = understanding smile.

Sam discovers the symbol had been reported at a bunch of homicides in Utah, near where Cas is. They can see that Gadreel is moving north and identify the next two big cities. They tell Cas to head to Auburn and they’ll go to Ogden and meet in the middle. Prior to this, though, is when Dean had his moment of self-reflection/self-loathing in the shower and emerged rubbing at the Mark, which prompted Sam to ask him if he was okay.

Shrugging off Sam’s concern with a hearty, “Let’s get to work!” Dean shoved his issues down, as he always does. This mission to head to Ogden was the perfect distraction from anything he might’ve seen inside himself that morning.

Back with Castiel, though, before he’s able to leave the room to head to Auburn, the lights flicker, the TV comes on, and Casa Erotica is playing, which Cas, predictably, deems “inappropriate.” However, in moments, our favorite mustachioed angel shows up on the show, then blinks into the room and says he needs Cas’ help.

Admittedly, I’m ashamed I didn’t see through the return of Gabriel sooner. He was just really,really Gabriel with the wit and the sarcasm and it was all a bit overwhelming, for Cas and for me. Gabe convinces Cas to take him with – only instead of heading to Auburn, they head to the bunker. He makes a convincing argument for where he’s been – hiding in Heaven until Metatron upset the fruit basket and it was raining winged men. He also knew about the “Crowley vs Abbadouche” fiasco and the angels rebelling against Metatron.

And his statement that he was tired of running from everything and wanted to take a stand and lead the angels against Metatron was both brave and clearly heartwarming for Cas to hear. He also revealed that the beacon being used to call the angels was his (Gabriel’s) horn. Huh.

It honestly wasn’t until he oh-so-casually stated, “We’re low on gas, aren’t we?” while looking out the passenger window that my Spidey-sense tingled. It was a clear set-up, that Gas-n-Go. When Metatron’s Minion’s showed, up, Gabe valiantly said he had enough Archangel juice to hold them off while Cas got away and took his place as leader.

Castiel’s, “What if I fail again?” kind of broke my heart. It made me want to give him a giant hug, too.

Gabe would’ve gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t for a meddling tear in Cas’ trench coat. Cas realized quickly that Gabe wasn’t real – though, Gabe’s enigmatic eyebrow waggle left me wondering if he was, in fact, really dead – and that he wasn’t in the Gas-n-Go or the motel room.

Cas: Was any of this real?

Gabe: None of it was real…but all of it was true.

Gabe tells Cas that Metatron is actually trying to help him and Cas, sounding much more human than angel, asks, “Really. How?”

Gabe: Errr…Sorry. I didn’t read the whole script. Just skimmed for my parts.

A piece of me wonders if that’s a Richard Speight, Jr., inside joke…. *smirk*

That’s when we see that Metatron had him bound and gagged and the whole “what gives story meaning” soliloquy was to Castiel, not to us.

Meanwhile, Gadreel was busy – in Ogden, as it turns out. The boys ‘won’ that coin toss. He was searching for the really random ingredients for the spell required to make Gabriel’s Horn work – Griffin feathers and Faerie bones. He saw ‘hunters signs’ on the door of an herb shop-like place and asked for the ingredients, answering the hippie sales clerks question of, “What the heck are you hunting, man?” with a clipped, “Family.”

When the boys arrive, the head to the shop and find the poor hippie dude hanging on the back of the storeroom door, his eyes burned out, ala Kevin. QUESTION – was that the guy they were referring to before? The one who had helped them with the witch?

The brothers know Gadreel is close, and because they are the best at what they do, are able to set up a holy fire trap. Gadreel is getting into his car, sees Sam moving stealthily down an alley, ducks into the shadows and waits. Sam “calls” Cas to ask for help (so fake – haha!) and Gadreel moves forward to attack, only just before he does, Dean calls out from above, “Hey, douchebag.”

Gad looks up, and Dean calmly drops his lighter, igniting a circle of holy fire, trapping Gadreel. Sam approaches looking ominously angry and growls, “Remember me?”

They take him to one of those plentiful abandoned warehouse/factory locations and chain him up. Sam is across from him, staring laser-beam daggers into the angel’s skull, while Dean stands to the side, arms crossed, silent and seething.

Gad is saying he won’t talk and Sam can’t make him. Sam’s like, “Oh, yeah?”

Gad: I’ve been inside you, Sam Winchester. Your insides reek of shame and weakness.

Sam = RRRAAWWWRRR!

He hauls off and belts the guy but hard. Dean is instantly in action, saying his name repeatedly to get his attention, and easing him back, hands to chest, then moving him away from Gadreel to a safer spot. He tells Sam that Gad isn’t going to break that fast.

Sam wants to “hack him like Crowley hacked me.” Dean has no desire to contact Crowley at this point – which was encouraging – and says they need Cas.

However, Cas isn’t answering Dean’s calls or texts and his GPS shows he hasn’t left the town he was when he called them – so he never got to Auburn. Dean tells Sam to go find him; he’s too close to this. Sam’s like, uh, hello pot, this is kettle. You’re black.

Dean: We’re here 10 minutes and you’re going Liam Neeson on his ass. I got this.

Sam agrees and leaves; Dean heads back in to Gadreel who’s all, oh, so you’re the good cop, huh?

Dean: I don’t care if you talk. You’re gonna pay for what you did to [Sam]. And for Kevin.

His voice sounded so freakin’ scary right there. Dangerous, man. I would not want to be on the receiving end of that voice.

Meanwhile, the reason Cas hadn’t been answering his calls, clearly, was that he’d been kidnapped by Metatron for the purpose of convincing him that he had to lead the angel rabble against Metatron. After giving Cas a massive book/TV show/movie download, he was able to more easily share his theory that every hero needs a villain. Only in this story – according to Metatron the author – Castiel was the villain. If he led the angels against Metatron, the angels would of course all die, but Cas would be saved and have a nice warm seat in Heaven.

Cas is basically like, get bent.

So, Metatron tries to sweeten the pot by telling him that the stolen grace inside of him is burning out and would burn him up. Metatron has the good stuff and could hook him up with an unlimited supply – he could get his wings back, even. Alllll he had to do was knowingly lead the lost, scattered angels that had been dumped from their home against Metatron The Hero so that they could all be slaughtered.

Cas, heroically, still says no.

But then Metatron finds out that the Winchesters have Gadreel. And things shift.

While Sam is away, though, Dean tortures Gadreel with the angel sword to get information…and Gadreel verbally works over Dean, claiming that while he was inside Sam he learned that Sam wouldn’t trade his life for Dean’s.

Dean: Sam’s already told me all of that. Hell, he’s told me worse.

And yet, despite that, when Gadreel mocked that it was the two of them against the world, Dean instantly replied, “Damn straight.”

*loves*

Gadreel yelled that Sam had always felt that way – it wasn’t just since the whole angel-possession thing. He tells Dean that Sam sees him as a scared little boy who’s afraid to be on his own because Daddy never loved him enough.

Dean is struggling. He keeps his face as impassive as possible, but his eyes…flinch.

Gadreel: He’s right, isn’t he? To think you are a coward. A sad, clingy, needy—

Dean = BAM! He punches the angel just as hard as Sam had…maybe harder.

Dean: Keep it up!

Gadreel: —pathetic, bottom-feeder who cannot take care of himself. Who could rather drag everyone through the mud than be alone. Who would let everyone around him die!

Dean – spun up tight by those words – launches forward with the angel sword, ready to stab it through, but at the last second, pulls himself up short, breathing hard.

Gadreel: DO IT! KILL ME!

Dean (drawing back): You’d like that, wouldn’t you? That’s what that whole speech was about? You’re not afraid to die…you’re afraid to be left in these chains. You can stay here and rot, you son of a bitch.

Dean walks away and Gadreel looks…small. I can imagine being chained and left behind does terrify him after centuries in Heaven jail, but I also wonder what Dean was thinking as he walked away. Not that Gadreel goaded him into almost killing him, but if there were any kernel of truth to what he said. If those had been Sam’s observations, musings that the angel had just twisted to hurt…but were still somewhat true.

The next scenes were artfully done as they cut between Sam and Dean, ratcheting up the tension and Dean’s increase turmoil. Sam arrives at Cas’ motel and heads inside, gun drawn. Dean goes to the bathroom at the abandoned warehouse/factory – and as an aside, I thought it was a little funny that the sinks and mirrors were visibly dirt-and-grim covered…and yet the water still worked, and the power was still on. Sam sees Cas’ cell on the floor of the room. Dean has a staring contest with a lonely, sad, resigned, weary looking reflection.

Dean splashes water on his face, trying to pull himself together. Sam faces down Metatron (I liked Sam's brief start when he turns to see Metatron behind him). Dean looks at the Mark. Metatron offers an even trade. Dean is slipping, visibly losing his grip on anything but the killer inside. Sam calls him just as he grabs the angel sword and storms out of the bathroom, leaving his phone behind.

This next scene is actually one of my favorites in the episode – yes, even over the shower scene.

Sam returns to the warehouse and rushes inside, sees Gadreel’s empty chair on its side, shouts out for Dean and sees his brother across the room, sitting on the floor, slouched against the wall, one leg bent under the other, staring blankly at his hands. Gadreel is out for the count near him, his face a bloody mess.

Sam rushes over and crouches down, doing that, “Dean, hey….” thing he does when he’s worried/scared about/for his brother.

Dean’s hands are a mess and he looks dazed.

Sam: You okay?

Dean (sounding groggy): Yeah…you gotta stop asking me that.

Sam: I’ve been calling you –

Dean (not tracking): He won’t talk!

Sam: I figured.

Dean (looking up at Sam finally, with a plea in his eyes so loud he could have been shouting HELP ME through a megaphone): He wanted to die…and I was gonna kill him. I was. But…then I stopped. Because I knew we need him to talk.

Sam looks Worried. He gets Dean to look at him again when his brother’s eyes wander away.

Sam: Dean, listen. Metatron has Cas. He’s offering a trade.

Dean (dazed again): We can’t trust Metatron.

Sam: I know that. Obviously. But this is the 1st time we’re gonna know for sure where he is. Let’s take Gadreel, meet up, and trap him.

Now, I think the old Sam might’ve seen the state Dean is in and maybe pulled back a little. Tried to get him to rest, get some help, something like that. But this Sam – despite his worry and confusion over Dean – is still focused on the job. What has to get done. How it has to get done. That’s where the “just business” part of him is still kicking in, despite his evident worry.

We see a shot of the Impala on the road and it daylight again. The boys wait for Metatron…who is late, but when he does show, he says he was just waiting for them to set their trap.

Metatrion: Am I hitting my mark?

Dean lights the holy fire ring and Metatron fake seizes for a minute, then laughs and asks if anyone brought S’mores. He blows out the fire, and when the boys pull their angel swords, he slams them back against the car. Heading to the trunk, he opens it, erases the angel warding, and hauls Gadreel out. A car pulls up and two minions drag Cas out for the trade. Dean asks him why he’s doing this and he’s basically like, because I can.

Metatron: Because you can’t stop me, but I’m going to enjoy watching you try.

Later that night, at the motel, Sam, Cas, and Dean are trying to figure out what the hell. Cas says that Metatron is playing God and Sam, recounting the whole blowing out holy fire like it was a birthday candle incident, thinks he’s doing a pretty damn good job.

Dean: What if there is a stairway to Heaven? Let’s find it and get the drop of the guy.

Sam (eyebrow raised): You want to sneak onto the Death Star? Take out the Emperor?

I don’t know…it’s not a bad plan. It worked for Luke, right? Of course, he did almost die and his evil-turned-good father had to save him, but still!

Cas: I’m not sure what a fictional battle station in space has to do with this but if taking out the Emperor means taking out Metatron, I’m on board.

The Boys = Buzzzah….

Dean: Did you just…understand the Death Star reference?

Cas: Yeah. But not what it has to do with Heaven.

Sam (glancing at Dean): Half-way, I guess.

Dean (to Cas): You sure you’re all right?

Cas: Yes. Are you? There’s something…different about you.

Dean (small smile, pats Cas on the shoulder): I’m fine.

Cas grabs his arm before he can pull it back, shoves up his sleeve and sees the Mark.

Cas (angry/scared combo): What have you done?

Dean: It’s a means to an end.

Cas: Dammit, Dean.

Sam looks nervous.

Dean (uncomfortable and needing out of that space, heads to the driver’s side): You find Heaven, you drop a dime. In the meantime, I got a Knight to kill.

Sam (to Cas): Be safe out there.

Cas: You, too. Hey, Sam? You keep an eye on him.

*LOVES*

Sam nods and gets into the car. He had been anyway, but if even Cas is worried about Dean, he's definitely going to be watching out for his brother.

We have a bit of a montage at that point with Metatron writing and talking to Gadreel – after being reassured that “the door” is secure and “the way home is safe.” He confesses to Gad that his “play” didn’t turn out like he planned (thanks to the Winchesters) but that every writer likes a good twist. Which is one of the reasons I can’t figure out what would satisfy him more – the twist that the ‘villain’ (Cas/the boys) is actually the hero, or the triumph of the intended hero (Metatron).

He talks about compelling characters, waiting to see where they lead him, knowing the ending, though not seeing the way there. Gadreel just listens with an enigmatic look on his face, then turns and walks away. Metatron puts on a record and while the Walker Bros’ “The Sun Ain’t Gonna Shine” plays, we see Cas tearing down the hunting clues he’d posted in his motel room and painting Gabriel’s Horn on the wall, the boys in the Impala – Sam stealing worried looks at Dean, while Dean stares stoically ahead, jaw tight – Metatron gleefully writing about Castiel’s “flock” joining him.

He ends the page with, “God watched over them, smiling at his good works. TO BE CONTINUED….”

*creepy*

That’s all for today, folks! They’re going to tell us to put up our tray tables here in a sec, so I’ll end here.

Again, sorry this was late! Thanks for your patience. I should be on time with the next five – and it looks to be quite a ride to the end of this season!

Hope to hear from you.

Slainte!

Comments

( 89 Tall Tales — Tell Me A Story )
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yasminke
Apr. 18th, 2014 05:38 am (UTC)
Love you, love your work (I'll read it later) — let's do lunch!

Air kiss.

Love,

Another fan
gaelicspirit
Apr. 18th, 2014 05:44 am (UTC)
*kisses back*

Always up for lunch with you, darling. Only this time, how about you fly across the ocean. ;)
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dreamsofspike
Apr. 18th, 2014 06:09 am (UTC)
For the record, agree or disagree, I very much enjoy your reaction posts :) *hugs*

And also for the record, on this episode I agree with you almost 100%. :P

***And Castiel is due for a win. He’s tried so hard for so long to do right. Each time he’s attempted to make a positive difference, he’s veered down the wrong path and only ended up making things worse for him, for the boys, and/or for the world.

If he’s going to lead the angels, it must end in a victory for him. Or nothing. It must.***

You're so completely right. This is how I see it. If they have Cas do the whole "I'm taking the deal with the devil but I'm secretly doing it to screw him over in the end" thing AGAIN, it's just insulting to the character. He HAS come so far, so much farther than that. :/

Of course... I think Metatron made a fatal flaw in his strategy when he gave Cas all that information. He probably knows it's risky. He probably thinks he just made Cas more of a "worthy opponent". But I think he just handed him the victory.

After all, Cas is the ONE ANGEL in all of history who managed to "rip up the ending" in the last big story, right? ;) What's to say he can't do it again? :)
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 01:59 am (UTC)
I think Metatron made a fatal flaw in his strategy when he gave Cas all that information. He probably knows it's risky. He probably thinks he just made Cas more of a "worthy opponent". But I think he just handed him the victory.

I want to think this very same thing. I want Metatron to have been so arrogant that he was the hero in this story that he gave Cas all the fuel he needed to outright defeat the scribe.

Let's see what happens in the last 5 epis!! :)
(Anonymous)
Apr. 18th, 2014 06:39 am (UTC)
Epi 18
Loved this! We have had some great ep 18's in the past and this one did not disappoint! From the shower scene "fans self " to the song blushed, Impala diving final scene this was a great ride for me. You don't know me from a whole in the wall but I have read most every word you have written re Supernatural. The saddest news, at least in the small world of fanfiction, that I read this week was your declaration that you were done with multi part fics. As a dedicated, if somewhat quiet fan, that hurts. I assume you have good reasons so I will try to be brave. I wanted to write tonight since you had lost a reader and let you know that you have many silent fans that enjoy your rambles and look forward to them each week. Thanks for the time and effort you put into each of them. Shazza
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:03 am (UTC)
Re: Epi 18
I remember you -- you've shared some sweet reviews to my stories. :)

I'm sorry that my stepping away from multi-chapter fics has upset you. :( I'll miss them as well, which is why I will keep writing the one-shots (and if you've read my one-shots, you know that they're not exactly...short).

I just don't have the time I once did, 8 years ago when I started writing fanfic, and through fanfic, I realized how much I enjoy creating original characters and telling their story. I love creating the SPN fics and sharing them with you guys, but once they're done and posted, nothing else can happen with them.

So, I decided to give writing original fic a go, use the time I dedicated to writing multi-chapter fanfic to writing an original fic that I might actually be able to publish. Just want to see what happens there.

I'm not going anywhere; and you'll still be hearing from me. Just not in the 100-300K word stories. :)

Thanks for your comments and the gift of your time.

Best,
Gaelic
borgmama1of5
Apr. 18th, 2014 07:31 am (UTC)
The hippie dude was the 'boy' that helped Sam and Dean with a witch hunt a while ago.

I heard that the next to last episode is called 'Stairway to Heaven.'

I do not understand why Jensen Ackles doesn't have a hundred Best Actor awards...no one says more without saying anything!!!

And the way this story could play out has so many possibilities that I am not even guessing at how it's going to end this season, I'm just going to watch and hold my breath...
jj1564
Apr. 18th, 2014 12:20 pm (UTC)
'I do not understand why Jensen Ackles doesn't have a hundred Best Actor awards...no one says more without saying anything!!!'

HEAR HEAR! I think the only actor that comes close to Jensen in looking so broken, tragic, sad, determined and every other emotion without uttering a line is Andrew Lincoln in The Walking Dead. I think if Jensen wasn't soooo beautiful he would be taken a lot more seriously as an actor. But then again I wouldn't want him to look any different!
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impala1967
Apr. 18th, 2014 08:09 am (UTC)
I love your rambles, so sorry to say you are stuck with me. They often put all my churning thoughts after an episode into a sembalence (?) of order and you write what I am trying to articulate (what is with the big words tonite, must be a chocolate rush ).

Again I really liked this episode, and even thought I'm not a big Gabriel fan I liked him in this episode, maybe cause he was all serious, which really should have given the game away immediately. And I thought metatron was good as well.

And 4 HOT guys on my TV at one time, I could only ask that I was there with them to make it any better :)

SHOWER SCENE .... why wasn't there more, more, more!!! We need to start a petition to get an exteneded scene on the dvd release lol. I did read one comment where somebody said that carver was just using flesh to get people to watch, hogwash, your explanation of the scene fit perfectly ... just wouldn't mind more Dean+Shower scenes ;)

Loved that little interaction between Dean and Cas over the phone . It made me smile, them being best buds again. And WTF now 'Cass' is canon, bloody hell!

And I heard that people where shitty with this episode , over I think what Gad said to Dean, but lets face it, its not like Dean hasn't heard it before stright from the horses mouth, so what is there to get annoyed over.

I loved your explanation with Sam. I see him as realizing that he is concerned about his brother, yes you are brothers Sam, but because of all that he has said he can't find a way to get Dean to open up. He can't find a way to be brothers again without having to apologise .... you of course put it much better than I did.

I am really enjoying this season, maybe cause Dean is getting a better shake out of it, but it feels like Kripkes seasons again. And I also have not idea how it will end ... hopefully with Cas (I love Cas) fixing heaven and feeling like he got this one RIGHT .... and hopefully with Deans mark storyline carrying on into S10.

Well thats about all from me, catch you next week

*hugs*

J

gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:08 am (UTC)
Hey, I'm happy to be stuck with you. *virtual fist-bump*

Y'know what else I liked about the shower scene? It was real. I mean, we know these guys are human so they do human things, but I like it when they SHOW us. Like when they show them sleeping, or that time they were Impala-camping on the side of the road and Dean was brushing his teeth. I like the shower scenes because it reminds us that they're not...super heroes. Y'know?


And I heard that people where shitty with this episode , over I think what Gad said to Dean, but lets face it, its not like Dean hasn't heard it before stright from the horses mouth, so what is there to get annoyed over.


Oh, for goodness sake. Sometimes I think people search for things to get pissy about. And like both you and Dean said, it's not like Sam himself hasn't said that and worse to Dean just like...5 episodes ago.

I am excited to see what the next 5 epis bring us. These boys just break my heart. And I love them for it. What's ~wrong~ with me??
milly_gal
Apr. 18th, 2014 08:33 am (UTC)
I'm mid-way through reading, but I just had to make a quick drive-by and say, in no way should you feel the need to defend your rambles, because a) they are a joy, well thought out, articulate, objective (despite your self confessed Dean fettish ;D) and worth every second it takes to read and b) they're just awesome sauce ;)

I find myself completely dug into your ramble reviews and I may not always comment (I'm a little sucky at that) but I always read and I think the fact that you can string a single sentence together after watching, is impressive.

Love your work hun, keep it up :)
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:09 am (UTC)
Thank you! :) I'm pleased you enjoy and thank you for taking time to let me know. Means a lot to me.

Hope to see you sometime over this last month of epis! :)
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hunenka
Apr. 18th, 2014 08:35 am (UTC)
Personally, I was kinda disappointed with this episode, simply because I find Metatron annoying and boring and the same goes about Castiel's endless repeat of the "I'm not a leader"/"I will reluctantly lead you" plotline. (So at least I'm glad he made up his mind now and I hope he'll emrace his leadership and stop with the insecurities - because I really want BAMF!Cas back.)

But of course, I loved all of Dean's scenes (it's a testament to Jensen's talent that I still can't watch the shower scene and just take it as eye candy - he just looks so miserable that I'm worried sick about him, want to wrap him up in a blanket and give him a hug).

I also loved Gabriel's return (although I knew the second he showed up he wasn't real), Ezekiel was great (I've loved Tahmoh since Dollhouse) and I liked Sam's growing concern for Dean. And then there were those two brief interactions between Cas and Dean - they just warmed my heart so much. I miss their friendship.

Huh. Now that I've written it all down it doesn't really seem like such a bad episode... *is confused*

Oh, and the most important thing - DO WRITE that missing scene with Sam helping Dean get to his feet!
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:11 am (UTC)
[I]want to wrap him up in a blanket and give him a hug

You and me both, sister.

I credit Tahmoh for me wanting Gadreel to redeem himself before this is all over. I adored him as Helo in Battlestar Gallactica (never saw Dollhouse), so I'm right there with you.

Huh. Now that I've written it all down it doesn't really seem like such a bad episode... *is confused*

LOL!

I'm stuck in an airport, waiting on my plane to visit family for one day and it's not going to be a great day, so I'm seriously contemplating writing that missing scene. We'll have to see if time allows..... :)
anactoria
Apr. 18th, 2014 09:10 am (UTC)
That enigmatic look at the end... I kind of hope Gadreel does have something else up his sleeve. I hate Metatron. I hate his smug face. (I think he's the only major SPN villain I've actively hated, so kudos to the actor on that one.) The show's so self-aware and knows how fandom engages with it and definitely knows that the author is not God, I think -- so hopefully Metatron's hubris is going to bite him on the arse in the not-too-distant future. ;)

IA with you and dreamsofspike about Cas. He's learned a lot since last time he tried to lead, and his reluctance to do so is testament to that. I think (desperately hope!) Metatron's made a big mistake by thinking he can be predicted.

I also wonder what Dean was thinking as he walked away. Not that Gadreel goaded him into almost killing him, but if there were any kernel of truth to what he said. If those had been Sam’s observations, musings that the angel had just twisted to hurt…but were still somewhat true.

Yeah, some of those things really are true. Dean is such a lost boy -- he is afraid of being alone, he is still trying to be what John wanted of him, and he is sad (who wouldn't be, after what he and Sam have been through?). And Sam is clearly aware of that. But I don't for a second believe he sees them as reasons for contempt, as Gadreel suggested. Dean has hurt him and he's justifiably angry, but that's not the same as thinking somebody is worthless. Fundamentally, Sam's still a compassionate person, and I don't think he'd still be around if he didn't believe Dean was capable of earning back his trust. (Whether Dean is capable of interpreting these things as anything other than 'NOBODY LOVES YOU, YOU SUCK' is another matter, of course...)

They're clearly going to have to go through the fire before they get close to fixing things, though. Dean was seriously scary in this episode. (And Cas's little freak-out over the Mark in the car park? Ouch, my heart.)
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:15 am (UTC)
I hate his smug face. (I think he's the only major SPN villain I've actively hated, so kudos to the actor on that one.)

I pretty much hated Dick, too. But I know what you mean.

Fundamentally, Sam's still a compassionate person, and I don't think he'd still be around if he didn't believe Dean was capable of earning back his trust. (Whether Dean is capable of interpreting these things as anything other than 'NOBODY LOVES YOU, YOU SUCK' is another matter, of course...)

I completely agree with you. What I had been attempting to say was not that Sam thought those things to the degree Gad spat them out, but if Dean embodied those attributes. I worry, like you said, that he's not capable of being self-aware right now and say, yeah, I have some of those traits, but I can't let them take me over. He's more in the YOU SUCK frame of mind right now. :(

Yeah, I'm ready to see where they take us the final 5 episodes. Meep!
tabaqui
Apr. 18th, 2014 11:38 am (UTC)
I'll read and comment later, but just gotta say - meh. Your rambles are easy to scroll right past. I'm sorry you lost a friend.
*smish*
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:16 am (UTC)
Yeah, I guess I figured if you were reading them, you either were doing so knowing I'm more of a Deangirl or would figure it out pretty quickly. Sam is important and I care about the character, but he's not who I gravitate toward. I just feel bad that others were upset by what they read. Or at least one other.
jj1564
Apr. 18th, 2014 12:34 pm (UTC)
I don't understand why someone would remove you from her friends list because she doesn't like your rambles, she didn't have to read them!! People are strange....!!

Anyway, as always, I loved your POV about this episode, I liked the stuff about storytelling and writing, it did strike a chord. My only problem is that I really find Metatron super-creepy, which I know he should be but I don't even like watching scenes he is in! I so wanted Gadreel to chop his smug head off his shoulders at the end!

I loved seeing Gabriel again, perhaps they could bring Balthazar back too! Miss him! Like you, I loved the fond little smile Cas gave when he spoke to Dean and the fact that both Sam and Cas now seem more concerned about Dean.

This is exactly how I felt about Dean's fight with Gadreel...


'The way he said that Gadreel wanted to die and that he was going to kill him, but stopped because he knew they needed the angel to talk showed in just a few simple words how much effort that control had taken. The person who is Dean didn’t let the person the Mark was creating inside of him take over. He pulled the killer back, shoved it into a corner, but it took so much out of him that he was physically weak.'

And yes, we should have seen Sam helping Dean to his feet. I thought both Jensen and Jared were fantastic in this episode, both saying so much with just a look and their body language, especially Jensen and his eyes in the shower scene looked like he hadn't slept for a week.

Despite my utter dislike of Metatron and foolishly reading some less than favorable comments before I watched it, I actually liked this episode. Thanks for posting - ramble on!





Edited at 2014-04-18 12:35 pm (UTC)
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:18 am (UTC)
Metatron is super-creepy, isn't he? Especially that little wicked grin of his. *shudders*

I thought both Jensen and Jared were fantastic in this episode, both saying so much with just a look and their body language, especially Jensen and his eyes in the shower scene looked like he hadn't slept for a week.

TOTALLY agree. Love our boys.

See you after that next one! :)
lemmypie
Apr. 18th, 2014 12:55 pm (UTC)
HI! I just wanted to say… I've always been annoyed that people write and tell you they are going to stop being your friend…. WHY? Just unfriend? Why make a production? Anyway. You KNOW I"m not active here at all anymore however I do tend to come by and read your recap. If I'm short on time I just read the first part. But I do come and read.
I have a question! Do you think Metatron HA! Get it METAtron. I'm a dork.
Back on track! Do you think Metatron knows about the Mark? Do you think he is so focused on being the hero that he is oblivious to it? I wonder?
Anyway! Hi! Keep writing, it doesn't matter if someone stops reading because you can me sure there are many still reading along at home.
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:22 am (UTC)
I think she was trying to break it to me gently -- like she knew I would notice and didn't want it to come as a surprise. Which it would have. But I get what you're saying, believe me.

I didn't know you came by and checked out the ramble occasionally! That made me grin.

Do you think Metatron knows about the Mark? Do you think he is so focused on being the hero that he is oblivious to it?

I wondered that myself -- I am leaning toward no. I think his focus is solely on defeating/overpowering/ruling the angels and he's missing the whole other battle that's going on -- Abbadon v Crowley. Or if he's not missing it, then he doesn't see it as an important storyline, so anything connected to it -- like the Mark -- would be a secondary storyline as well.

And, as awful as the Mark is becoming when it comes to Dean, the fact that Metatron doesn't know about it (assuming I'm right) could be the thing that saves them....

Keep writing, it doesn't matter if someone stops reading because you can me sure there are many still reading along at home.

Thanks for that. Made my night. :)
qultng1
Apr. 18th, 2014 01:14 pm (UTC)
I did enjoy this episode a lot more reading your ramble than I did actually watching it, certain things aside. For me it was one that I needed to gel a bit with before deciding if I liked it. Your timing with the ramble worked out beautifully for me. :D

When Metatron was writing/talking at the beginning, I thought, "What?! Does he think he's Chuck?!?!?" It kind of showed me that he's trying desperately, but can't really cut the whole "God" thing. He'll fall. *she said confidently*

I, too, thought Sam was weakening a bit this week. I have total faith that when push comes to shove, he'll be "Sammy on the spot" and there for his brother. :D

I'm really glad we don't have any more breaks before the end of the season, but that means we'll be at the end of the season! :( Anyway, as always I'm along for the ride wherever we go, no matter how tempted I might be to jump off. lol
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:24 am (UTC)
I agree. Metatron is way too arrogant NOT to fall.

I have total faith that when push comes to shove, he'll be "Sammy on the spot" and there for his brother. :D

I want this to be true so bad. I'm going to have faith right along with you. :)
jesters_tear82
Apr. 18th, 2014 01:23 pm (UTC)
Hey you! You're such a dear for rambling on the plane, don't think your effort goes unappreciated, ok? There're plenty of us who will stick by you even if our opinions don't always match. I don't think you've been mean to Sam at all, on the contrary, both you & I have been trying to see his side & analyze his actions with our brains rather than our hearts (which go out to Dean mostly). Besides, I truly believe the world would be a boring place if all of us thought exactly alike.. perceptions are subjective & change from one person to another, just like Metatron's been trying to teach us :)

- Gabriel's alive, I'm telling you, alive!! ;) What a pleasant surprise, right? Even if he wasn't real, would have loved to see him meet the boys too, brings me back to old trickster days..

- I too found the episode mind provoking & I kept thinking: "Gaelic would so agree with this!" when Metatron spoke of the story, the characters & their relationship with the writer. Initially I couldn't figure out why he wants Cas to fight him so badly, but then when he declared himself the hero it made sense. Still, I kept expecting the twist he was talking about, & just like you was sure Gadreel was going to do something shocking. Anywho, Metatron may think he has the upper hand right now but the Winchesters are a bag full of surprises, & the twist just may come from them ;)

- Cas is now a pop culture expert! so cool even if he still doesn't get it :) I've missed him the last few eps. His favorite line for me was when he told Sam to keep an eye on Dean. Finally he too knows about the Mark & hopefully will play a part in saving Dean when the time comes.

- Really love your shower theory, the cleansing water trying to wash over the mark without success, & then Dean looking in the mirror & you gotta wonder what he's seeing looking back at him.. & the voices in our head are really strongest in complete silence, when there're no distractions. Look, I'm not just trying to find an excuse for naked, drippy Dean, not at all *blushes*

- Sam is worried about Dean, even Robbie Thompson who wrote the ep twitted Sam said so to Cas but it got cut in editing. Lucky thing is, just like Jensen is rocking Dean's Mark of Cain, Jared really brought it this ep with the way he looked & talked to Dean, you could really feel the care. I just wish he'd let Dean know in a few words he's there for him, convey somehow that they're far from perfect still but brothers non the less. Also: MAJOR LIKE for the missing scene!

- You got your wish, ep 9.22 is "Stairway to Heaven"! & the last for the season is called "Do You Believe in Miracles", which I love, & I do :)

See you next week!
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:28 am (UTC)
don't think your effort goes unappreciated, ok? There're plenty of us who will stick by you even if our opinions don't always match

Thank you! :)

Anywho, Metatron may think he has the upper hand right now but the Winchesters are a bag full of surprises, & the twist just may come from them

I agree! :)

Sam is worried about Dean, even Robbie Thompson who wrote the ep twitted Sam said so to Cas but it got cut in editing. Lucky thing is, just like Jensen is rocking Dean's Mark of Cain, Jared really brought it this ep with the way he looked & talked to Dean, you could really feel the care. I just wish he'd let Dean know in a few words he's there for him, convey somehow that they're far from perfect still but brothers non the less

Aw, man! I am bummed it got cut! Extended scene!! :) And I agree -- Jared has a great way of bringing me back around to Sam's view point even after he's said or done things that have been incredibly erg!

I LOVE the name of the last two epis!! First -- ZEPPELIN! But also, the finale title gives me hope. *crosses fingers*
yohkobennington
Apr. 18th, 2014 01:38 pm (UTC)
Sorry your "friend" decided to unfriend you when it's so easy to just...uh...I don't know, not read the rambles? /shrugs Whatever.

I'm just going to drop this
 photo tumblr_n43qwr8M831rxmwhyo1_500_zps5a3d28fb.gif
and go my merry way because I've nothing to say about this episode.



ETA: I just the eyelashes comment:
tumblr_n43qsf444I1qjakk2o1_500
I got a lot of them on journal because I lost my shit with that opening scene so...xD


gif is not mine

Edited at 2014-04-18 03:08 pm (UTC)
jackfan2
Apr. 18th, 2014 08:06 pm (UTC)
*HUGS YOU TIGHT FOR THESE GIFS*

Just saying... 'cept now, I can't stop watching. Dean's. Eyes. Blinking. Rapidly. *bites fist*
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(Deleted comment)
gaelicspirit
Apr. 21st, 2014 02:32 am (UTC)
You are still a wonderful friend and I like communicating with you about other stuff! Also you could flat out tell me that my most favoriteded show of all time that I spend most of my time with is utter garbage and I would STILL love you to itty bitty pieces.

I don't feel the need to agree with everything my friends online say or do ... just like they don't have to agree with me.


((HUGS YOU TIGHT))

Thank you, my friend. I appreciate that.

I know you won't judge. And to be honest...I think I do kinda need to talk. But I just have to keep going, going, going. I have to much I have to take care of and then other stuff I want to take care of and suddenly time is gone.

One of these days I may post a personal update. You guys have been my sanity check for several years now. :)
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